//
...............I don't even.........just........What Is This?......just read it.

...............I don't even.........just........What Is This?......just read it.

Posted March 6th, 2013 by BearWithAStrawberry

by bwas
in denial.

 

?

A/N: coughcoughcough no message here cough

Unedited. Feast on the hideousness.

Please don’t try to comfort me.

?

?

?

Pain.

That one, simple, plain word slices like a knife down your throat.

Pain.

I like pain.

I feels like a drop of caramel, slowly melting into my body.

I like pain best in the silence of night, when my only witnesses are blood and the moon.

I relish a bittersweet dizzy feel.

I love the cold that tingles up my spine.

I like the pain that shoots through my body.

No pity, no dirty looks, no mirrors…..

That’s the way I like it.

No heat, no shorts, no sun…..delightful.

No sneers, no snickers, no therapists….

wouldn’t that be nice?

Pain, darkness, hesitation….isn’t that perfect?

But the question is why.

Why

Do there have to be imperfections?

Why do there have to be butterflies on our arms?

Why

Are there slammed doors, drawn curtains and shattered glass?

Why

Are there bruises and scratches.

Because there is pain. There are tears, and there are razor-sharp objects. Because we have feelings, because we aren’t made of marble. Because.

Pain makes us miserable.

I’m different.

Pain.

The feel enlightens my very soul. Like a fresh tub of ice-cream on a hot day, sitting next to tortured others.

Pain.

Hurt.

Enjoy.

 

A/N 2: this is not a poem. the formatting just happens to be like this.

 


See more stories by bwas
Well-written, artful,

Well-written, artful, somewhat masochistic, very well done. I very much love the mood that you gave this... sort of a rebellion to the world as we know it and how we view pain and emotional suffering. :) It was nice seeing emotions like this conveyed in a mature, creative way like this. :) Thank you for posting!  

 

~~There's no Canada like French Canada, it's the best Canada in the land~~

Posted by Sandy on Wed, 03/06/2013 - 17:06
thank you very much,

thank you very much, Sandy.

it means alot to me that you would read and comment on my work.

thank you.

and yes, i am somewhat masochistic.

the sweet regret of getting punished......

 

 

 

Posted by Sunsets (S.E)An... on Wed, 03/06/2013 - 17:32
not a big fan on the title

not a big fan on the title you used to get people's attention, (i don't really like profanity, whether you spell it right or not, or even if your say it in another language, i find it rude and ugly, {unless of course you get scared...then its understandable}) But otherwise your poem is really good.

 

 

"Not stealing, just borrowing with intent to keep" ~Paelen from Pegasus

"I used to like math, then it turned into algebra." ~ Me

"I am more than you ever imagine" ~Iris

I need a good name for my book but can't decide! Help me choose!http://www.kidpub.com/poll/i-need-name-book-i-am-writing-which-one-sounds-more-catchy-2437135492 .

Posted by Leighla on Wed, 03/06/2013 - 19:23
It was not used to get other

It was not used to get other people's attention.

It's called a title.

No, it is not a poem.

thanks, you made me feel a whole lot better about what i'm going through.

Posted by BearWithAStrawberry on Wed, 03/06/2013 - 19:47
1. I wasn't trying to be

1. I wasn't trying to be rude.

2. I am well aware of what it is...

3. I am entitled to my opinion just as much as you are.

4. Whether it is a poem or not, I like it.

 

"Not stealing, just borrowing with intent to keep" ~Paelen from Pegasus

"I used to like math, then it turned into algebra." ~ Me

"I am more than you could ever imagine" ~Iris

 

Posted by Leighla on Wed, 03/06/2013 - 21:07
/le slow clap/ Quite a

/le slow clap/

Quite a debater, are you not?

Posted by Sunsets (S.E)An... on Wed, 03/06/2013 - 22:39
yes actually i am...I guess

yes actually i am...I guess that would make me good in politics, if i ever get into them, still leaning in on the vet job.

 

 

"Not stealing, just borrowing with intent to keep" ~Paelen from Pegasus

"I used to like math, then it turned into algebra." ~ Me

"I am more than you could ever imagine" ~Iris

Posted by Leighla on Thu, 03/07/2013 - 13:22
Heh. I was forced against my

Heh.

I was forced against my will to debating class.

-_-

don'task

Posted by Sunsets (S.E)An... on Thu, 03/07/2013 - 18:07
Overall, this is a beauitful

Overall, this is a beauitful piece of writing. The darkness that peek between words is quite well-written, and the descriptions give a nice visual that paints a picture in the mind. You have great writing skills. I do, however, hope that you're okay.

 

~~Hey you; get off of my cloud~~

Posted by Poison Ivy {Lena} on Wed, 03/06/2013 - 19:42
yeah, thanks :) i hope i'm

yeah, thanks :)

i hope i'm okay too.

Posted by Sunsets (S.E)An... on Wed, 03/06/2013 - 19:47
Oh my gosh. Okay, I feel

Oh my gosh.

Okay, I feel strangely drawn to this. I feel a milder form of this piece (not calling it a poem. :3), and you wrote it very well, with just a few sentences telling a dark tale. Faving. And if this is about you, I hope you're okay. You're an excellent writer, by the way.

 

~

Me

Ever wanted to get sucked into a book?

~

Posted by strawberry on Thu, 03/07/2013 - 00:45
:). it is about me, but

:).

it is about me, but thank you, Sravani.

you're the best!

Posted by Sunsets (S.E)An... on Thu, 03/07/2013 - 16:43
I am sorry, but I must agree

I am sorry, but I must agree with some other kidpubbers. The title is not very appealing.

 

So if I punch myself and it hurts, does that mean that I am really strong, or really weak?

Posted by Megan on Thu, 03/07/2013 - 01:59
sure, i appreciate CC, but

sure, i appreciate CC, but this isn't constructive.

if you don't have anything nice to say, don't.

it's my story, is it not?

i'd appreciate a good dose of sarcasm and critisism, but there's got to be a real meaning on the side.

What's this supposed to mean?

Posted by Sunsets (S.E)An... on Thu, 03/07/2013 - 16:48
I love the words. How they

I love the words. How they all are meant to be together, it's like you were just the right person to write this... piece. It's like it's directly from your thoughts. Which, I suppose, it probably is. I like the simplicity of some of the lines and how they blend with some of the lengthy lines. I love this. I have favourited it (I did it before I commented :3 ) and I think it's really wonderful. I'm really glad you decided to post this, in a way, because it does tell a lot about you, whether you meant it to or not. It shows you're strong, but you feel like you're weak but it also shows that you aren't cruel, and you have a sensitive side. Maybe people miss that sensitive side and that's what makes you feel this way. Although the title wasn't exactly perfect for a kid's website, it did draw me in and it did make me want to know what's the matter or what has happened, again whether you meant it or not. I also found it interesting how you referred to Summer on more than one occasion. It makes me wonder whether you love it, despise it, or it's just the fact that that is the season you are in. Aside from all this, I hope you are okay. I won't try (and probably fail) to soothe you, if that's what you wish. But if you need to say anything, I'm here, 'kay?

 

~evasong

 

"As long as my face is on page one, I don't care what they say about me on page seventeen." ~ Mick Jagger

Posted by The Rambler (ev... on Thu, 03/07/2013 - 04:30
Thank you. Thank you for

Thank you.

Thank you for being there for me :)

I changed the title btw.

Posted by Sunsets (S.E)An... on Thu, 03/07/2013 - 16:49
my.......creativity isn't

my.......creativity isn't appreciated. :/

Posted by Sunsets (S.E)An... on Thu, 03/07/2013 - 16:49
While the title isn't my

While the title isn't my favorite, I really love this piece. It's dark, very descriptive, and emotional. Awesome!  Two thumbs up!

Please read and comment on my KP story, Saving KidPub - http://www.kidpub.com/book-page-or-chapter/saving-kidpub-chapter-1-17341...

Posted by Venus McFlytrap... on Thu, 03/07/2013 - 15:06
Thank you. haha. two thumbs

Thank you.

yesyes

haha.

two thumbs up back to you!

Posted by Sunsets (S.E)An... on Thu, 03/07/2013 - 16:50
Thank you guys for all the

Thank you guys for all the nice /coughonlysomecoughcough/ comments.

Posted by Sunsets (S.E)An... on Thu, 03/07/2013 - 19:22
i now have a new

i now have a new pen-name!

mwahaha!

 

 

Never gonna give you up Never gonna let you down Never gonna run around and desert you Never gonna make you cry Never gonna say goodbye Never gonna tell a lie and hurt you

Posted by Via-del-Dolore ... on Sat, 03/09/2013 - 14:11
i now have a new

i now have a new pen-name!

mwahaha!

 

 

Never gonna give you up Never gonna let you down Never gonna run around and desert you Never gonna make you cry Never gonna say goodbye Never gonna tell a lie and hurt you

Posted by Via-del-Dolore ... on Sat, 03/09/2013 - 14:11
They aren't being mean.

They aren't being mean. Thery are only telling their opinion that they don't like the title.

Do you hear the people sing? Lost in the valley of the night It is the music of a people who are climbing to the light For the wretched of the earth There is a flame that never dies Even the darkest nights will end and the sun will rise -Les Mi

Posted by ConfuzzlingPsyc... on Sat, 03/09/2013 - 14:14

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