Unintended Consequences (Mystery/Romance)
| by
Cream- Puff Cupcake <3 in ecstasy watching AVPM!! |
Penelope was absorbed in her new book. The title of the book told everyone why she was so into it.
Mysteries and Secrets by Wihelm Sjimun.
Calliope was hunched over her computer, writing poetry and researching.
Skylar was hiding behind the couch almost ready to launch a sneak attack on her sisters.
She lept out with a war cry. Calliope spun around in her chair so fast she fell and shrieked. Penelope snorted and tossed a sneaker at Skylar. Calliope was sneaking up behind Skylar and suddenly.... CHAOS!
Wrestling eachother, the red headed, green eyed triplets rolled across the room.
Their mother rushed into the room.
"Girls!" Smokey was steaming. "You could've hurt yourselfs!"
The Triple Terrors untangled and each tried to look sad for upsetting their mother. Some were better then others. Skylar looked as if she were having a slight case of indegistion. Penelope managed to looked tired and hungry. Calliope looked as if she was going to burst into tears. "Just be more careful ok?" Smokey asked.
"Yes mother" they faithfully chorused.
Smokey left the room and Calliope started to giggle." I - I - she thought - I---" she fell into hysteria.
Upstairs, the girls collapsed onto their seperate beds. Calliope started a picture of the tree outside her window and twirled her long dark hair. Penelope hopped up and down on her bed with her auburn hair in braid flying up and down behind her. Skylar was kicking a soccerball against the walls of the room. "Juggling" she called it. To her sisters, it was called "pointlessly bashing a ball repeatedly against the wall." On Calliope's side of the bedroom there was a large window. She stared moodilly out the window and watched Adyn Sinclair walk out of his house and down the road towards the community art studio. She sighed.
"What's wrong Calli?" Penelope asked.
"Nothing, nothing" she replied.
"You aren't still obsessed with Adyn..... are you?" Skylar asked.
" Well..." Calliope started to answer.
"All that happened was when they were taking art classes at the studio, Adyn asked her to go to the Australian Outback Restaurant!" Penelope defended her sister angrily. "Anway don't you have some of you're own problems to deal with?" Skylar stuttered and backed up.
"N-no."
"Whatever" said Calliope. Leaving Skylar and Penelope alone, she stared out the window once more and noticed Adyn returning from the studio. He looked up and saw her in the window. She blushed furiously but he waved at her.
Calliope's heart sang.
Adyn was looking at his latest sketch, a picture of the Noels house. As he looked up, contemplating the clouds as a sketch, he saw Calliope Noel looking down at him. She looked as if she wanted to say something, but as she was going to duck out of the window space Adyn waved at her and it was clearly visible that her cheeks turned a bright, primrose pink.
"What a strange girl" he thought as he hurried up the slope to his house.
Inside, his mother was making brownies. "How was your art class sweetie?" she asked.
"Fine" he mumbled. Then he thumped up the stairs to his bedroom and stared out the window, watching Calli (as he affectionately thought of her) pull her hip length hair in to long pigtails. She does not know.
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MEGA <3 THIS! :D
I love the "juggling"/"randomly bashing ball against the wall" part. ^_^ TRIPLE TERRORS!
My only suggestion, is each time a new person speaks, you should start a new paragraph.
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Elementalist or Sorcerer? That's for YOU to decide...:D.
yea, same as Pokey. I will deff. be following!!!
~These fights and lack of comments are spreading fire throughout KidPub. If we don't stop soon, everyone will be upset and mean to each other. So instead of fighting, let's just write. If KidPub burns, we burn with it.~ Me.
I love how this is laid out! Nice job! I will be following... one thing though.
You can take or leave this critique, but when I was writing in third person the one thing people would tell me to watch out for is repeating my characters names too much in the same paragraph. There were just a few spots that I noticed that the reader already knew who you were talking about without you putting the name in there. Though it may be more neccesary considering you are writing about 3 different people all in one time.
- Kay - Just because I am different, doesn't mean I'm weak. ~~Me~~