in
January 30th, 2005
Chapter 10
Runaways
Mr. Morris dropped me off at the trail that led to my home. Even
though it was warm for a November night, I was shivering as I made my way
down the trail. It was well past 10:00, and I still had to talk to them
about what I'd learn. I spat on the ground thinking about my little
speach I had wrote to myself about my mother. At least the lady who called
herself my mother. I spat on the ground for her and Dad. Spitting them
out of my life. Helen's idea of running away seemed better and better
as the minutes ticked by.
As the house that I once called my home came into veiw, I walked even
slower than I did before. The lights seemed to be on in every room. I
knew Dad was beside himself in worry. I could see his shadow in the
window pacing back and fourth. As soon as I stepped onto the porch, the
porch light shinned down on me, and Dad came rushing to the door.
"Where were you?" he shouted jerking me into the house.
I calmly placed my bookbag on the floor, and looked up at him as cold
and hard as my face would allow me.
"Well?" he said in a calmer voice.
Caroline came rushing around. As soon as she saw me, she gathered me up
into a big hug.
"My baby, my baby!" she cooed.
I pushed her away and glared up at the both of them.
"I'm not your baby," I spat in a cold, calm voice. "I'm Londa's
baby."
Everything was quiet. Dad opened his mouth to say something, but
nothing came out.
Suzie came rushing in with two doll babies in her arms. "Red! Red!"
she chatted. I didn't even look down at her. My eyes were fixed on my
father's.
"What are you talking about?" Caroline finally asked.
"You don't know?" I laughed bitterly. "You must have forgotten. Just
like you forgot to tell me that you weren't my mother."
"Where did you hear this craziness?" she commanded. "There is no
Londa Harris!"
"Who mentioned Harris?" I said, my smile growing colder.
Her face turned a bright pink as she turned toward Dad.
"Who told you about Londa?" he asked, his voice low.
"You most certainly didn't tell me," I snapped.
"That wasn't my question, Red," he shot back.
"This," I said unzipping my bookbag and carefully taking the news
clipping out. "the newspaper told me."
He snatched it out of my fingers, and read it over quickly. His face
was a deep red, and it looked like he was trembling. He bawled the paper
up, and threw it at me. "Well, big girl, congratulations. You found out
the truth." He began walking out when I called him back.
"Why didn't you ever tell me?" I cried, the tears I was determined to
keep under my eyelids, slid free. "Why did you keep it such a big
secret? Let me go on believing that she," I pointed an acusing finger at
Caroline, "was my mother. You lied to me. You kept it away for so long.
And now that I have to found out on my own, it breaks my heart more." I
screamed.
"Nooo!" Caroline screamed. She ran over to me and began shaking me.
"None of it's true."
She slapped me across my face so hard, it felt as if my neck had
cracked. "Don't you ever, ever, ever say anything like that again, or
else....." she let her sentance trail off. "You little lair."
I shook my head, a little dizzy over the blow. I slowly picked up the
bawled up news clipping. "What about this?"
Her face was almost purple with fury. She snatched the clipping out of
my trembling fingers, and threw it in the fireplace. I watched the
proof of the mother that I never had, go up in flames.
I woke up the next morning wondering if I had dreamed it all. But as I
felt the whip that remained after the blow Caroline gave me, I knew it
was true. I didn't know I had as much hatred in me as I did when I
thought of her sour smiles. And to know that Suzie and I didn't share the
same mother disgusted me. The way Dad let Caroline slap me across the
face without hesitation. I slowly slid out of bed, making no attempt to
say my usual morning prayer. I didn't want to be mad at God, but how
could he let all of this happen to me? Out of all the billions and
billions of girls in this world, he chose me.
I walked slowly over to my bookbag, and pulled out Helen's number.
She's probly sleep on this Saturday morning, I thought. I looked over at
my watch on my dresser. It was already 11:05!
I found her number, and went over to my phone to dail. I punched in
the numbers slowly, hoping that Ariea wouldn't answer.
"Hello?" I heard the familar voice of Helen's after the third ring. I
sent a silent prayer of thanks to God. Maybe He wasn't all that bad.
"Helen, it's me. Red."
"Oh, Red! How did things turn out last night?"
"Can I come over? I don't feel comfortable talking about it over the
phone." I whispered, in case Caroline or Dad were easedropping.
"Sure! When?"
"Can you come over my house. I don't know how I'll get to your house
without my dad or Caroline having to take me."
"Yeah, I guess. But my mom will have to drop me off."
I panicked. That would only make Caroline more angrey, I thought. Than
I thought of her trying not to believe the truth. Trying not to face
the facts of life. Trying to go on believing a lie.
"That'll be great. Ask her if she'd have time to come in, 'kay?"
"Okay, Red. But are you sure...."
"Nothing to worry about. I have this all figured out. Be here at
12:00"
Caroline leaned on her elbows, over the counter, and looked at me
suspiously.
"What friend is coming over?" she asked.
"A friend I met at school," I snapped.
"Well, why did you invite her over?"
"For fellowship, what else!"
"Um," she said rubbing her finger around the rim of her coffe mug.
I hope her finger falls in, I thought smiling at the idea.
"When is your friend coming over?" she asked.
"At 12:00. Her mom is dropping her off. Her name is Helen."
Dad looked up from his newspaper. "Helen what? What's her last name?"
Helen Morris..... Helen Morgan!
"Helen Morgan. She's lives here in Sandre. Her mom is dropping her
off," I added quickly.
Dad looked over at Caroline who was glaring at me. I knew she didn't
want me to have a friend over. "I'm very dissapointed with your behavior
last night. Why would you think such a thing?" she asked as if she
didn't know. I didn't reply. Instead I looked at Daddy with pleading eyes.
"Just let her come over," he mumbled, pulling his newspaper back up.
"Thanks," I said dryly. I didn't want them to think I was on their
good side. I stood up, and walked out of the room.
DING DONG! I rushed out of my room and into the living room to get the
door. I smoothed my hair down, and opened the door calmly. Helen stood
there in jean supenders, with a tight, brown, cotten shirt under. She
had a brown hat to match the shirt. She wore ruby-red lipstick, gold
loop earrings, and even a little blush. She wore a brown leather coat with
matching brown boots that had fur on the top. She actually looked
pretty.
"Hi," I managed to get out.
"Hello, Red, my dear consin! We had a little trouble finding your
home, but we're here on time," she greeted me back, looking at the gold
watch that hung from her wrist. I turned around to see if anyone heard
Helen's 'cousin' to me. I was safe.
"You're fine. Just come on in, we have the heater on, and we don't
want any of that cold air getting in. Where's your mom?"
"She's coming. She's just making sure her hair is all right," Helen
replied, walking past me into the house. She whistled as she did so.
"Hey, Red! I thought you said it was your room that was messy. When
was the last time you mother, or so called mother, dusted in here?"
Dad walked into the living room. I bit down on my lower lip that was
trembling so bad that I could barely talk.
"Dad this my friend Helen...."
"Cousin!" Just as the words flew out of Helen's mouth, Mrs. Morris,
my Aunt Jenny, walked into the house. Dad looked up at her, his
expression blank. But I could tell by how hard he was starring at her that he
knew who she was.
"Wayne," she hissed. "Wayne, Wayne Wayne. It's been a long time. A
very long time. I was overjoyed when my daughter," she nodded at Helen,
"told me that Red wanted me to come over as well." She smiled a smile so
cold, it sent chills down my spine. "The Red that killed my sister
because of you!" She pointed an acusing finger at him.
Dad yanked me by my arm so hard, I was sure something had cracked,
and slapped me. It as the wrost that he'd ever given me, for I tasted the
saltly blood on my lips.
"You little liar!" he roared. He slapped me again, which sent me to
the ground. I laid there, the pain growing wrost and wrost, as he kicked
me. After the last kick, he began screaming at Aunt Jenny about
something, but I didn't understand. I couldn't undersatnd. I was too dizzy to
understand. Actually, I began to feel light. Everything went black.
I felt something cool on my head, and I heard soft crying. I tried to
open my eyes, but they were so heavey, they seemed to be sealed.
"Red, are you wake?" I heard.
I couldn't figure out who it was, but the voice sounded familair.
"Ohh," I moaned. "My head."
"Don't worry, Red. Let me find a house. I've never been to WesBrige
before. Just wake up, I know you can help me find some place to stay
here."
I slowly opened my eyes, and tried to sit up. She began helping me. As
soon as I was in a sitting position, I tried to make out where I was,
and who was talking to me. As my head cleared more, I reconized Helen's
face. Then Suzie's. Suzie was sleep in the soft grass that we were
sitting in. It was about evening.
"What's going on? Where are we? Why do my head hurt? Why are we
sitting in this grass?" I fired the questions at her with command, as my
head contiued to spin.
"All right, Red." she laughed. "Thank God you're alive. For a moment
there, I thought your dad had killed you."
"Well?" I said, more calmly.
"We're running away!" she squealed. "Now, that shoud explain
everything."
"Where are we?"
"WesBrige. I hichiked this guy as I dragged you along. Actually your
stepmother, Caroline helped me drag you to the car, and," she nodded at
Suzie, "She came out of the house after me. I was afriad your dad would
hurt her.
You see, Mother started yelling at me, saying it was my fault that I
brought you and your family back into our lives. She went on and on
about me being fat, dumb, and how she would have expected something like
this from me. After a while, she and Caroline began fighting. And I know
that Caroline was pregneat, right?"
"Right," I said, nodding.
"Well, I was fed up with it, so I grabbed my mother's wallet, and
nearly dragged you out of the house.
"You didn't tell me you had a little sister."
"That's Suzie."
"Well Suzie ran out behind me, which sent Caroline. She wanted to
know what I was doing. I told her."
"You told her?"
"Yeah, she don't love you anyway. So she helped me hichike a boy who
looked no more than eightteen years old. She didn't realize Suzie had
gotten into the car. This driver asked me where I wanted to go. I told
him, where ever he was going. He said he was going to WesBrige. I told
him that he could drop us off here.
"He was really sweet, though. He said we didn't have to pay him.
Speaking of money, let's see how much we have," she said taking a black,
leather wallet out of her pocket."
I shivered and wrapped my arms around myself. "It's cold," I said
through chattering teeth. "Suzie can catch a cold."
Helen took off her jacket, and wrapped it around Suzie. She began
counting the money.
"So," I said. I was very aware and awake now, "what did that guy say
about me?"
"I told him the turth."
"You WHAT?"
"I explained our situations, and he said he understood. He also said
he would keep it a secret."
"A secret? Ha! Let's go. We have no more time to waste." I stood up,
and felt a little dizzy. I guess I showed it, because Helen grabbed me.
"Whoa! Are you okay?" she asked.
"I'll make it. Now we'd better go on. Caroline knows that we're
running away. She might want Suzie, and come looking for us."
Helen nodded, and as she put the money back in the wallet.
"We have $234.48." she said with a smile of satisfaction. "And I know
her SAFE number. We'll take all of th money out. She can trace us down
if we use it at different places, different times."
I nodded. "Good idea."
I looked down at Suzie, as the realization hit me. We were really
running away. We had money, we had plans, we had eachother. But in reality,
we had nothing. Nothing but a big problem on our hands.
I knocked on Ronda's window as quietly as possible. We heard a little
shuffling. After about ten minutes, the window slid open, and a pistol
was pointing at us. I held back the scream that was on the very edge of
coming out.
"Ronda! It's me, Red!" I hissed.
Midnite, Ronda's older sister peeked out. She gasped, and pointed at
me.
"Your daddy looking for you, gurl! He called and sounded pretty mad."
She looked at Helen. "And you," she shook her head, "your mother said
that she didn't want to ever se you again, and was glad that you were
gone.
But Wayne has already got a search group looking for you, Red. And
they're starting here in WesBrige. If I were you, I'd go head an' turn
myself in, 'cause your Daddy gonna bust you."
Ronda came over. "Red! Where were you. I hope you know you in a lot of
trouble. And...."
"Would everybody stop reminding me how much trouble I'm in," I
whispered, annoyed.
"We're running away," Helen said excitedly.
Midnite and Ronda looked at Helen with blank expressions and than
turned back to me.
"Who's your friend, and why are you running away?" Ronda asked.
After explaining the whole story to them, Ronda shook her head.
"White people," she muttered. "Are y'all hungrey? We can give y'all
some chips for your little trip," she laughed dryly. "Do y'all really
think y'all can get away with this? 'Cause if you do, forget it. Your
daddy have his ways. You will be caught in three days, or less," said
Ronda as she walked off to get us some chips for our little trip, as she
called it.
"So why did y'all come here?" Midnite asked leaning out of the
window. "Y'all thought we were going to take y'all sides and go running away
with y'all?" She threw her head back, her long braids tossing around
her sholders, and laughed. "I really do feel sorry for y'all. Especially
you, Red. Um, um, um." She shook her head and laughed again.
Ronda came walking back in with a bag of sour cream-n-onion chips.
She threw them out the window at us. She looked at us with her lips
sealed tight into a straight line, and shook her head. "What are you trying
to do, Red? Get yourself in more trouble? I think not. I'm not going to
let my friend get beat up by her daddy just because of some stupid
mistake. Now I already called Abby and Jesse. They're on the way, now."
"What about Eshi?" I asked.
"What about Eshi?"
"Ronda."
"I forgot," she said dryly. "She'll only make this meeting later,
anyway."
"Ronda, she's apart of the group, and you know it. Now go call her,"
I said.
"Ronda, she's apart of the group, and you know it. Now go call her,"
she mimicked. "I'm not calling sh-"
"What group?" Helen interupted her.
Ronda looked from me to Helen, and than went walking away, muttering
something about Eshi.
I felt less confident about running away, now. Ronda had spoiled all of
the fun with the naked turth.
"The group is, Nieva Sista. It's a group some friends and I made up,
when I lived down here. If it's okay with Abby, you can join."
"What do you guys do?"
I sighed in frustration. "We're just best friends, and share our
closest secrets with eachother. That's all."
"That's all! Man, it seems like you weren't as lonely as me after
all!"
"I guess not, huh," I said without any interest.
Suzie began waking up, calling on Daddy. "Where am I?" she wailed as
she realized we weren't home.
"We're on vacation," I said so if people were curious, she would just
say we were on vacation.
"Well why ain't Daddy with us, huh?" she said.
"Sush!" I whispered harshly. "Be quiet. Daddy ain't coming with us."
"Why?"
"Because I said so."
"DADDY!" she screamed. "RED TRYING TO ACT LIKE MY MAMA!"
"Shut up," I hissed covering her mouth. "He ain't with us!"
"Oh, shoot!" Midnite said. "My ma commin'! Y'all betta go hiding!"
I lifted Suzie and ran behind some bushes with Helen at my heal. We saw
Mrs. Hankins enter the room, and look out of the window. She closed the
window. We saw shadows of her shaking her head, and walking out.
"Are you gonna keep quiet?" I whispered to Suzie.
She nodded, her blue eyes big. I sowly uncovered her mouth.
She let out an earpiercing scream.
"DADDY! RED IS SCARING ME! HER AND DIS OTHER GIRL HERE IN THE-"
I pulled her down, while covering her mouth. "Now I'm not gonna uncover
your big mouth!" I snapped.
We saw Mrs. Hankins shadow come into Ronda's room again, only this
time, we heard her.
"Are you and Midnite hiding Red, them?" she said really loud. We
didn't hear their reponse.
Mrs. Hankins came to the window and began calling Suzie's name, for she
knew Suzie would answer.
Suzie began squirming in my arms. I tried to hold her with one hand,
and keep her mouth covered with the other. But she was too smart. She
elbowed me in the stomach so hard, that I had to let go of her. Helen
reached for her, but Suzie growled at her in reponse, her little teeth
glittering in the dark.
She ran over to the window as quick as her chubby legs would allow
her.
I cursed under my breath, as I watched Mrs. Hankins pick her up.
"Let's go," Helen said through clenched teeth.
"What about Suzie," I said still holding my stomach.
"Forget her. She isn't your real sister after all. I'm sure that
lady'll get her back to your dad."
I sighed. I knew she was right.
"Look. It'll be more money for us. We can't run around with a baby
with us. It'll make us more obvious."
"Look, we can just wait right here until morning," I pleaded.
"Look, Red. Do you want to get caught?"
I shook my head, the tears foaming under my eyelids. Helen smirked.
"Then don't suggest something so stupid again. Let's go. We've come too
far to turn around."
I nodded, feeling defeated, and followed her quietly out of the bushes,
and into the front yard that led to the streets.
Chapter 11
Empty Souls
"Where are we?" I wondered aloud, as we traveled the cobble stoned
streets, with huge lanterns glittering down over them. We were walking for
nearly two hours. Even though I'd never been to a place like this in
WesBrige before, I knew that it must be some place for the rich. Some of
the richest people in South Carolina lived in WesBrige. Also some of
the poorest.
Helen shook her head as she looked at the huge glamarous houses,
gates, and trees. Statues were everyplace we turned our heads, and the
streets were so clean, I believed you could eat off of them. Even though
winter was edging itself in, flowers still bloomed, and trees were still
full of life.
"I don't know where we are," she admitted.
"What about your map?"
"I left it in the bushes at your friend's home.
I shivered as we walked farther into the streets, the beautiful houses
seemed to have all the lights on. I even caught a sight when two little
girls were playing together in a statue where water was flowing out.
They were dressed in fluffy hunter-green dresses, with matching hats.
Their aurburn hair was in big, fat curls that sprawled down their back. It
made me think of my little sister..... half sister, Suzie. She had a
whole family. A mother and father who had so much love for her in their
hearts, that some day, I think it'll burst. Suzie even has a little
sister on the way.
But me, my own dad, who is still alive, don't even care about me,
thanks to Caroline Winkins. A dad who abused me, thank's to Caroline
Winkins. A dad who would agree for me not to live up to the turth about my
mother, thank's to Caroline Winkins. A dad who didn't even love me,
anymore. Caroline Winkins, I thought bitterly, thanks to her. I hope she
feels bad and guilty.
"Look, a police car!" Helen shirked.
"Turn around and run," I ordered.
Just as we began to run, the police turned his lights on, and began
coming toward us.
"Just stop," Helen said. "My mother doesn't want me, so she might not
have reported me. Let me do all of the talking."
The car pulled up beside us, and a police stepped out.
"What are you two gals doin'?" he asked in a light, throaty, southern
voice.
"We were just going home, sir," Helen smiled.
"So why did ya run?"
"We, uh, thought we might get in trouble for, uh...."
"Our aunt told us that we weren't supose to go outside, and if she
found out that we did, she'd put the police on us. We thought that she
was just kidding." I cut in for Helen.
"Um," he said stroking his small mustach. "Yer aunt was kidding.
Ain't no call fer us ta come out and git ya. Betta git on to ya aunt's
'fore I tell," he said, laughing at his own dumb joke. He looked over us
closely. "Which house is yer aunt's?" he asked.
Helen and I looked at eachother. I nodded at the house where we saw the
two girls playing.
"That house over beside the one with the little girls. We're visiting
for thanksgiving." I added.
He smirked. "Mind if I give ya a ride to ya aunts?"
"No, thank you," Helen said, taking my arm. "Let's go, sis."
As we ran off toward the house, we heard the police howling with
laughter behind us.
"Are we really gonna go there?" Helen asked.
I shrugged. "We really have no choice. That police can still see us.
Let's just go, ring the doorbell, and ask if we can use their phone.
We'll call a taxi, and get the heck outta here."
She nodded, panting, as if she were running for miles. As we approached
the house, rather mansion, our running turned into skipping. When we
were on the side walk, we were walking as slow or slower than turtles.
"Let me do the talking," I said firmly. "You almost got us in trouble
back there."
Helen shook her head. "We might be in bigger trouble now, thanks to
you," she huffed. "These people can call that police right back there,
once they see us. I know how rich people react to people like us."
"What's wrong with us?" I commaned.
"Look at your clothes. They're dirty and stink. Believe me, I come
from a rich family. We do it in a heartbeat."
I bit my lower lip, and shook my head. "Let's just see. You never
know."
I pushed the doorbell, and waited. A tall, skinny man, in a black
tuxedo with a gotte to match his small patch of white hair, peered down at
us. His gentle, gray eyes were warm and inviting.
"Yes," he said, in a rather deep voice, "how can I help you?"
"We were wondering if we could use your phone," I said.
He looked back. "Well..... I don't know. I'm just a butlar, but I'll
ask Madam Velisunssa. I'm sure she wouldn't mind."
He closed the door and went to get the owner of the huge mansion. About
two minutes later, a tall, slim lady came to the door. She was dressed
so elegent, it looked like she was going to a ball. She had white
dimond, tear drop earrings hanging from each ear, and a ring on each finger.
A gold watch, which looked like a braclet, hung from her small wrist.
This also had dimonds in it. Her golden blond hair was pulled up in a
french twist, with candy curls spilling over it. Her blue eyes were warm
and friendly, too. She smiled at us, her white teeth glittering in the
dark.
She looked us over, her bright eyes glemming with excitment.
"Hello," she said. Her voice was youthful and full of song. "You
would like to use our telephone, I hear."
"Yes," I replied, "if you don't mind. We don't mean to waste any
time."
She nodded. "Is it an emerency?"
"Sort of," Helen mumbled. "We're lost, but in no hurry to go home. We
just need a taxi."
"I see," she smiled. "I'll let you use my phone...... only if you
stay for supper. I'm having it late tonight." She looked at us hopefully.
"Sure!" Helen piped up. "For free, right?"
"Right."
I looked at Helen. What was she thinking? This was a complete stranger.
I shook my head slowly.
"I don't think....."
"No, please! I won't hurt you. I need company," her blue eyes were
pleading, and the bag of chips that Ronda had given us, didn't do much on
our journey.
"All right," I agreed.
"By the way, My name is Carla Velisunssa. Just call me Carla," she
laughed lightly as she led us in.
I had never seen anything more beautiful in my life. White italian
marble floors, the high celings with chandilairs hanging, the candles
looking like jewels. Beautiful glass vases of roses were on every table.
Large portaits of beautiful ladies in pink and red were everyplace. Fine,
white leather chairs in the living room, and huge draperies that went
all the way to the floor.
A grand staircase of the same marble with a gold banister led up to
who knows where. A huge plush rug, was in the middle of the living
room. Statues were everyplace I looked. A huge, black grand piano was in
the corner, with a vase of roses on the end. It was threes times bigger
and prettier than Helen's.
I guess Carla saw our suprise, for she laughed.
"It's nothing compared to some of the houses around here," she said.
"Here's the phone. You can use that after supper." She nodded at a
phone that was on a marbled table.
"We..... I have five bathrooms, two restrooms. Right now, you'll need
the restroom." Carla explained.
"What do you mean, right now?" I asked.
She shrugged and laughed that light laugh again, but didn't reply.
She pointed at a white door. "That there is the restroom. Go ahead and
wash your hands. I'll tell Martin to cook his best. He's the best
italian cook in Siver Rose." she said proudly.
"Silver Rose?" I asked.
"Darling, you don't know what Silver Rose is? It's the name of this
countey. It's a small part of WesBrige. Where are you girls from,
anyhow?"
"Uh, Sandre, but Red," Helen nodded at me, "is from WesBrige. She
recently moved to Sandre."
"But you're running away, correct?"
Helen and I gasped, and looked at her with wide eyes. "How did you
know?" Helen asked. I glared at her.
"The news. It's all over. I saw you all's picture on the televison.
I'm surprise that police didn't get you," she said.
"How'd you know we talked with a police," I asked.
"Christina, my maid, saw as she was dusting," she replied. "Don't be
offended in anyway. I'll help you. Just go wash up for supper, and I'll
tell you guys my story."
"First of all, I'm twenty-eight years old, and as you can see, I'm
rich. Rich but lonely. You see I was once married to a very handsome man,
named Neil Charles Gorden Velisunssa. He was so charming, strong, and
heathly." Carla's looked away wistfully, tears sheding in her bright
eyes, making them look glassy. "We met in a privite school, which I was
forced to attend. I didn't want to go to a school where there were just
rich, snobby kids. I didn't want to a school where those kind were there
at all! But Mama made me. Things weren't going so good then. Girls
would tease me, because my clothes weren't as pretty and expensive as
there's, and boys would pull pratical jokes on me, and I'd get in trouble
for them all.
"Than I met Neil. I met him after a group of boys tripped me up and
my books fell everyplace. Neil came and picked them up for me. He held
them for me until we got to my class. I thanked him, and he wanted to
know when he could see me again. That's when a long, blissful love began
between Neil and I. We grauated together, even went to the same
college. We kept all of this away from our parents. You see, Neil came from a
very wealthy family, I, from a middle class, which to them was very
poor.
"So when I became pregneat, we decided to run away. Just like you,"
Carla smiled. "We were living in West Virgina at the time. We planed to
drive here, South Carolina, after eachother. I was suppose to go the
day before him. My parents had both died of cancer, and I was already
packed.
"When I reached here, I was driving through WesBrige, when the time
to have the baby came. I was only eight months pregneat, so you can
imagine my surprise. I had five pound, eight ounces, Sarah Hannah
Velisunssa. Sarah Hannah was beautiful, with my big blue eyes, and Neil's
hazel-nut brown hair. She was so soft and small. I called Neil who said he
was on his way.
"We were married in two weeks, and lived in a small apartment in
Columbia. He was determined to start his own bussiness. So he did, he and
some friends he had started building houses. With all the money Neil
had, their bussiness was rolling in no time. They built houses in Sandre,
Columbia, Mrytle Beach, Connerfeild,Charlston, and WesBrige, where we
decided to move.
"Neil and the guys, brought this property that I now live on, and
began building houses for our families. They called themselves the Silver
Rose. Over fifty men were working with the Silver Rose after a while,
and these houses were built in no time.
"So when the time came to move in, I was twenty-five, and Neil,
twenty-six. We decided to throw a party. Sarah Hannah would stay with her
our maid, Christina, who was also her nanny. We held a big sucessful
party, until the end. The day we moved in the mansion, our home, was the
day Neil lost his life." She shook her head, her fist bawled up. "He went
for a ride in his new sports car and......."
Her sentance trailed off, and she bit her trembling lip, tears spilling
down her cheeks.
"It's okay," I comforted.
"What about your daughter, Sarah Hannah?" Helen asked.
I kicked her under the table, but she ignored me, and looked at Carla
with curious eyes. Carla took a deep breath.
"Her furneal was two days ago. I don't know what happened! She just
wouldn't wake up!" Carla cried, throwing her fist in the air, her tears
coming faster. "I went to her room, and.... and she refused to wake up,
refused! Why? Why!"
Carla stood, and fled from the huge dinning room, her hands covering
her face.
"Carla!" I cried. "Carla, don't worry!" I ran after her, up the
stairs, and into a huge master bedroom. She threw herself on the bed,
sobbing as hard as her little heart allowed.
I sat on the edge of the bed. "Carla," I said softly. "I didn't lose
a daughter, but a mother....... and I just found out."
She turned toward me, her face red and sober. "I know, sweetie. Wayne
Harris," Carla's voice cracked as she said my father's name. "I only
knew him by the rumors I heard of him. He's a very handsome guy, though."
She sat up in her bed, and hugged me. "Could you and Helen stay with me
for a while? I'll disguse you, and make you look like you're related to
me."
I smiled. It couldn't have worked out more perfect. "Sure. We already
told that police that we were visiting you as your niece."
Carla nodded. "Okay. I'll say that you, Red and Helen came to my house
ealier, and my niece answered the door. You explained your sistuation
to her, and she explained who she was, and why she was here. Than she
goes to ask me. I refuse, of course, and you two go down the road, and
meet that police on your way to get to another house. Get it?"
I shook my head in confusion. "But that didn't happen."
"Duh! You two will be my nieces, but Red and Helen also....... in
disguise. We won't tell this to anyone outside of this home. The only
people who will know is Harry, the butlar, Christina, and Martin. The
gardeners, I reckon we'll tell them, too. Maybe not. They come once a
week, and still have yet to come this one. So, we'll tell them you girls
came Sunday."
My confused smile widened into a smile of gratefulness.
"Thank's Carla," I said.
"You're welcome, honey," she said, patting my cheek. "Now lets go
tell Helen, and finish the rest of supper. Martin's a very good cook, and
all of that talking and crying's got me hungrey. How about it?"
I nodded eargerly. Finally, I thought, the real world. The real life.
I'm ready for anything that comes my way.
"So this is where running away leads us," Helen smiled as she sipped
the chocolate milk shake, Christina had brought her. I had a blueberry
soothie. "It couldn't have worked out better. And we're still in South
Carolina!"
"It is great," I admitted. "Even though I do miss Suzie a great
deal."
"Ah, don't worry about her. If we had brought her here with us, it
probably would have caused fresh wounds for Carla. She just buried a
child two days ago, you know." Helen said licking her lips. "And as I said
before, she isn't your real sister."
I nodded, my head down. "She's my half sister, and I love her still. I
was the mother to her that Caroline wasn't. And-"
"Would you just keep those stupid people out of my paridise? Look, if
you wanted to stay with them, you shouldn't have runned away. Look at
what you have now! Stop whinning and enjoy." Helen slumped back on the
chair, and crossed her arms. "This isn't paridise for only me, Red. I
want you to enjoy it. Forget you had any other family than me. Me and
Carla. We're rich now. You said it yourself. No one will know outside
these walls. Actually, Carla is discussing it over with everyone now. So
cheer up!" Tears slipped down Helen's cheek. "I don't mean to sound mean,
but..... but this is my chance to have a mother who really does love
me. A family. I may not have a father, now, but only because he died.
Red," she touched my hand across the table, "we're not doing this for
Carla only. We're doing it for ourselves. So cheer up. We're going to be
the family we never had."
"But Helen, we can't live on dreams and fairytales all our lives. We
have to face the turth. Or the turth will come when we least expect it,
and it'll hurt really bad.
"For example, when clues about my mother, Londa, were flying at me in
my face, I turned my cheek, and hoped it wasn't true. But when the
turth came....."
"You ended up here, in this big, luxurious house," Helen interuppted.
"Red, when you dream, big things happen. It proved itself to you. Don't
you," she pointed her finger in my face, "run away from the turth."
"Helen! You want to use your imaginations. You want to believe that
Carla is your mother. But in the end, it will only cause more pain for
us all. One day, you'll miss your family. You'll miss your home. You'll
live a lie the rest of your life. You can, Helen, but I won't." I stood
up. "We'll stay for one night..."
"We? Red, you'll get discovered before you can get off the street
corner. And who knows what your mad daddy would do to you. Stay, Red.
Please. That, honey, will be best for you..... us."
I didn't want to listen to Helen. To believe her words, but I didn't
want to get caught.
Carla walked in, her hips swaying to her little steps.
"Girls! Are you enjoying everything?" she asked lifting her perfectly
arched eyebrows.
"You don't give us much of a choice," Helen said, her gloom mood
brightening. I wondered if the tears she shed were really real or my
imagination.
"And you, Red?" she turned her eyes toward me. They had a cold glint
in them. I wondered if she overheard our conversation.
"I've never been in anything like it before," I replied without much
enthusiasm.
"But that wasn't my question," her voice dripped with false
sweetness.
"It's....it's rich! It's beautiful! And, uh, I...I-"
"Wouldn't trade it for anything, right?" she interuppted.
"Right."
Helen poked me in the ribs, her fingernails feeling like needles. I
winced, but held my smile. What was going on?
"Well," Carla said, her eyes still on me, "I might as well show you
girls to your rooms. We have so much to do!"
I walked behind Carla to a room that was a bluish white. It was dim,
but the opened window provided light, causing a small, soothing breeze
to flow in.
"Isn't the air condintioner on?" I asked, my hair was whipping softly
around my neck, as the breeze flowed through it. I felt more relaxed.
"Yeah, but I close the vents in this room. Sarah Hannah, this was her
room. She never liked the air to be on, so her vents were always
closed. We always left the window open, leaving the screen down, before she
went to bed. It was just like this...... the day she died."
A chill went down my spine, and I suddered.
"Why'd you bring me here, Carla?" I asked the question so softly,
that even I wondered if the words had slipped out, or if my mouth just
moving. I began to believe that my mouth were just moving, when she grew
silent. She turned to me, her face seeming gray and ghostly.
"I want you to sleep in here. This is your home now, and I am your
mother.
I shook my head, and back up. "Carla you're just a friend who let us
in. We won't stay long if you don't want us to."
"I heard your and Helen's conversation. How can you talk like that.
We're not living on imanginations! We're living the turth. This is the
life every girl like you would want. You should be thankful. You see how
lonely I am, right?"
I only shook my head and took another step back.
"RIGHT!" she screamed, when I didn't reply to her question.
"Carla," I said, "I know you miss Sarah Hannah, but-"
"Mother," she said firmly. "And what do you mean, missed?" she smiled
at me coldly. "You are Sarah Hannah."
I shook my head slowly. "No," I said firmly. "I will never be able to
replace your daughter. She's gone."
"NOOO!" she screamed. "You're not gone. Look!" she pointed to a large
portait of a little girl with sholder-length red hair. The girl's cold
blue eyes seemed to be starring at me. But inside those cold blue eyes,
I saw loniness, frustration, and anger. Her eyes seemed to be peircing
right through me. When I stepped back again, it seemed as if her eyes
followed me. I stepped back again, and tripped over a teddy bear, and
onto a doll baby. The toy began to cry mama.
The words chatting over and over in my mind. "Mama! Mama!"
Carla smiled at me coldly. "Welcome home, baby."
I flew out of the room, and into Helen's.
"Get out!" I screamed. "We're leaving."
"Huh?" she looked like she was in a daze. "What are you talking
about, sister?"
"Helen, come on! Carla isn't who you think she is! She's sick!"
"How DARE you say that about my mother," she demanded, her eyes
blazing.
She picked up a hard covered book, and threw it at me. "We don't have
any sick folks in this family!" she hissed, her eyes into small slits.
"Helen! What's wrong with you? Are you insane? We...."
"Daughters! I will have none of this!" Carla said, as she stepped in
the doorway.
"I'm NOT your daughter," I retorted firmly, as I turned around to
face her. "Now shut-up and smell the coffe. It's beginning to burn."
"Sarah Hannah! Whatever are you talking about?" Helen asked. The both
of them were starring at me with fury and frustration in their eyes.
Carla took a step forward. Her lips were in a tight line, and her
eyes were narrow icicles.
"Go to your room," she ordered, her voice was strangely deep. "And I
will, since you've been a naughty girl today, open the vents of the air
condintioner and close your window. Now go on," she said taking two
steps closer.
"No," I said coldly. I took a step toward her, which sent her a step
back. "You know, I wonder if you were lying about Neil." I rested my
finger on my chin in mock wonder. "Maybe you never had anyone to love,
and you're ashamed. And you want us to be with you. You want us to ruin
our lives with you. Well if you think that, you're imagining that too.
Just like you think that I can be your dead daughter. Well guess what,
I CAN'T!" I screamed.
Her eyes seemed to buldge out, and she took a step toward me. Than
her eyes softened.
"You're right, Red. I'm sorry. Go to bed, now." she whispered.
"We've had enough for one day."
She began to walk out. Just as her hand touched the doorknob, she
turned around. "Oh, and I forgot to mention. Christina will be bringing up
hot chocolate for you girls. Always make you feel better." she added.
Helen and I nodded. As soon as we heard her footsteps echo down the
stairs, we both let out a deep sigh of releif.
"What was up with you?" I asked Helen.
"I saw shadows and I thought it was Carla. No, I know it was Carla.
She made me promise that I'll always take her side. She claimed you were
too self-centered, and you would want to leave her.
"Well, Red, I should have listened to you before. Which is why we're
running away, again. We'll do it after she go to bed. We'll take some
food, too. She's weird and strange. She hurting. But the way she's
feeling and acting is beyond us." Helen said breathlessly. "I'm sorry."
"Me too," I said running my fingers through my hair. "Let's go to bed
now..... pretend to go to bed. I like your plan."
"Wow! Let's look for some bags to put the food in. All this food can't
fit into our hands," Helen exclaimed.
"We ain't gonna take much," I said, opening the frezzer. "We'll eat
something at Abby's."
"Abby?"
"A friend of mine. She'll love our plans, I hope."
"Call her before you get there."
"No! Carla can easily track us down."
"We'll be gone by then, dummy."
I looked away, so she wouldn't see the tears in my eyes. Why did I run
away? Why? The question kept repeating itself in my mind.
"Come on, Red. You're wasting time just standing there with your head
bowed. Look for the bags, I'll get the food.
Chapter 12
Depressed
"All right. I didn't know WesBrige was this big. I didn't think anyone
could get lost here," I said. "We've been walking for three hours, and
I haven't reconized anything! Why don't we just turn ourselves in."
"No! We can't give up, now! After all we've been through, you wanna
give up now? Red, I know you're tired, but it'll be well worth it."
"Well let's just call Abby," I suggested weakly.
"At three o'clock in the morning? Just keep walking. We could use the
excersice."
"We?"
"Shut up. Maybe we can stop at a gas station and ask for directions.
It wouldn't hurt."
"The quicker we do that, the quicker we're caught."
"Right. I guess we should have planned this out more carefully,"
Helen admitted. "This isn't going so well.
"Maybe your daddy do care about you. He sho' is putting up a big
show. I wonder how much money the person who finds us'll get," Helen
wondered aloud."
"$1,000.00!" we heard behind us.
"Uncle Billy! Where are you taking us?" I screamed.
"How much money ya got?" he asked, his ciggerate dangling between his
lips.
"$234.48," Helen replied before thinking.
"Give it to me," he said gripping the streeling wheel, his eyes on
the road.
"I mean, $134.48," Helen said, glancing at me.
"Don't lie to me, gal, hand the money over. I ain't playing with ya."
Helen handed all of the money to him, as he reached out to her
trembling fingers. He snatched it from her, and laughed.
"Now, girls, I'm gonna help ya. You have to pay to keep this mouth
shut." He laughed again. "Well, Red, interdouce me to yer friend, rather
consin."
I looked back at Helen, whose face was pale with fear. I didn't blame
her. Uncle Billy smell like he was dead over a hundred years, and
looked that way too.
He had on torn, dirty jeans, a camoflouge hat, his hair hanging
around his shouders, he looked as if he hadn't shaved in decades, and wore
no shirt. He had on mud covered boots, with no socks, and that made him
smell worst. Plus, he had the windows rolled up, so we couldn't get
fresh air.
He was driving crazy, and he had and had an empty beer bottle beside
him, that I presume he had before meeting us.
I saw flashing blue lights behind us.
"Police!" I screamed.
"Huh?" Uncle Billy said, looking over his sholder.
I heard him curse under his breath, as he stomped on the acelarator.
Helen screamed as we ran through three red lights, and onto a bridge.
"Unlce Billy! Stop!" I screamed.
He only laughed and sped up. I covered my face with my hands, and cried
softly.
The blues lights slowly faded as he drove faster and faster. Finally
we lost him.
Uncle Bill pulled into the woods, and jumped out of the car.
"Run!" He hollared. "And don't ever come back," his eyes were wide,
and furious.
Helen wasted no time getting out of the sation wagon, grabbing his
wallet, and running. I quickly did the same.
"Git back here," he screamed after us. "Give me my money, or I'll..."
We didn't hear the rest of his sentance. As soon as we lost him, we
stopped for breath, both of us leaning on our knees, panting.
"Let's go," I said.
As we ran more and more, the town came into view.
"Yes!" I cried, pumping my fist in the air. "I know where we are."
"I don't feel good," Helen whispered.
I hadn't realize how cold it was. "Let's get some cappochino."
As we walked pass empty store by empty store, I began loseing hope.
"Some stupid gas store has to be open," I said more to myself.
I looked over at Helen. She was trembling and her lips were blue. I
looked down at myself. I didn't even have a coat. And my cold, hard hands
felt numb.
"We should have stayed at Carla's," Helen said wistfully, kicking a
rock.
"Wrong," I replied. "We shouldn't have ran away. We would have been
safely in bed. Warm," I added, softly.
We walked over to a Wal-Mart, and sat on a bench beside the closed
doors.
Memories flooded through my mind, of when I was with Daddy and Suzie.
When I was at Aunt Molly's, baking cookies, and drinking hot chocolate.
Or when I was with Abby and the girls in the Choke's pool. The time I
sanged Amazing Grace with Jesse. I closed my eyes, and began to sing.
Helen joined me.
"......was blind, but now I see."
We singed ourselves to sleep. Together.
Where did running away leave us? Here on a cold November night,
sleeping on a bench.
I was woken up by the sound of harsh bickering. A man and a lady.
"These ain't the girls, Phobe. Those are some homeless scums!"
"Yes, it is! Look! One has red hair, just like the picture! And the
other's got brown, just like the picture! We can get us some extra
money. The newspaper here says, $1,000! I'm gonna go call the police."
"No, let me do it."
"Well I reconized them first, Ramen."
"We'll both go. And halfa go to you, and halfa go to me."
"We'll see about that! Now be quiet. We do want them to still be here
when they come back."
They both giggled to themselve with glee, as they walked off. When I
was sure they were gone. I opened my eyes, and slapped Helen's thigh.
"Get up, girl!" I whispered. "Someone's gonna call the poice on us!"
"What?"
"Just do it!"
Helen and I both jumped up at the same time, and began running. We
heard shouting behind us, but we paid no mind to it.
Soon we were in a neighborhood..... again. But I reconized this one.
"Abby's house is right over there," I pointed to the huge, two storie
house.
"Wow!" Helen exclaimed. "And I thought I was rich! Was your house
that big, too?" she asked.
"No," I replied. "I was, what they'd call down here, dirt poor. We
lived in a two bedroom apartment."
Daylight was slowly setting in, as we made our way across the lawn.
We went around the back. I climbed up the tree that led to her room,
and knocked.
There was no answer. I knocked again.
I heard suffling around, and than Abby opened the window.
"Git in here, now, you crazy fool," she commanded before I could say
anything.
After I was in, I saw the rest of the girls in there, starring at me,
their eyes blazed with anger. Helen scrambled in behind me, after
trying a couple of times.
"What the hamsandwhich was you thinking, running away like that?"
Abby demanded.
"I wasn't thinking," I retorted, "I was knocked out."
All the girls gasped.
"She's right," Helen piped up. "Her daddy knocked her out after
having to face the turth about Red knowing about her mother. Knocking her
down to the ground like that, would have probably killed me. She was just
use to it."
Abby's face softened. "Well, he seemed sorry, enough. Giving all that
money away like that. I'm sorry it happpened and all, but you really
should go back home. He called us to see if you were here. At first he
sounded angrey, but after he losened up, he was really hurt, scared, and
worried about you."
"Yeah," Jesse agreed, "maybe he thought it'd be better if he told you
when you turned eightteen."
I shook my head, and told them the story about the night when I went
and addressed them about it."
"He was confused," Eshi offered.
"Confused? How could he be confused? He knew very well what I was
talking about." I stated.
"Maybe the shock of it all," she went on. "How it happen....."
"Enough, Lewis," Abby said, holding up her hand. "It's too late now,
and it's up to us what to do about it."
"You're not gonna tell, are you?" Helen asked.
Abby smirked. "Depends."
"We've got mon-"
"Nothing but eachother," I broke in.
"How much money?" Abby asked, ignoring me, her eyes on Helen.
Helen glanced at me nervously. "$52.00," she lied.
Abby nooded and reached into her desk. "Well I only have five dollars
left from my allowence, but it's all I have to offer." she smiled at us
with a glint in her eyes. I knew that glint too well, but said nothing.
"We have more than $200.00," Helen revealed. "But thank's anyway."
"I need some...."
"No, Abby," I interrupted. "we came here to say good-bye."
"Good-bye? For what? Your dad is gonna catch you before this week's
over, Red. That's in three more days or less," she whispered, leaning
closer to me, her breath hot and husky.
"How do you know that?" I asked, trying hard to sound even.
"How do we know?" Eshi jumped in. "This is Wayne Harris, we're
talking about. He don't play. He'll find you all right. If I were you..."
"Well you're not me," I snapped. "And you never will be me. You'll
always be the rich Eshianna Lewis, blonde and beautiful. And you," I
pointed at Abby, "you'll always be the popular tomboy. Jesse, you'll always
be the singing queen who'll always be something big in time to come.
Ronda, you'll be Miss. President after you grauate. And me," I laughed
bitterly, the tears streaming down my cheeks. "I thought I'd always be
something big. I thought I'd be someone. Be seen in magizines, in
newspapers, on televisons, heard on radios. But look at me. I have no future.
No love, no happiness, no nothing." I sobbed.
"You have me," Ronda offered softly, reaching out to touch my hand.
"Me too," Jesse and Eshi said at the same time.
"Red," Abby said softly, "you are someone, nomatter what your
background, who your daddy, or what your reputation. Don't have a pity party
over something as stupid as that. It's up to you to be someone. And I
love you. So does your dad."
Even though my sobbing wasn't as bad, tears still raced down my cheeks.
"Y'all wouldn't say that if you were me for two hours. What look
happy on the outside is always hurt on the outside."
"Then don't you think we have problems, too?" Ronda pointed out.
"Yeah, but I'm hurt on the outside and inside," I whimpered.
"The way your daddy abuse you...." Helen started.
"Shut-up, dumbo," Abby spat. "You don't even have a family anymore."
"Neither do she," Helen pointed a finger at me. "At least her daddy
love her, so you say," Helen's voice trembled as she covered her face.
"Here we go again," Ronda mumbled. "What's wrong with you, child?"
she asked Helen.
"It's just that, I'm....I'm...it hurts!" Helen cried, bursting into
tears.
Ronda walked over to Helen, and hugged her.
"I think this is a time we need eachother most," Jesse said, placing
an arm around Eshi. Eshi placed her arm around Ronda, and Ronda Helen.
Abby and I joined the little circle, one of my arms around Jesse the
other around Abby. Abby's around Helen and mine.
"Don't worry, sisters," Abby smiled through her tears. "It's all
gonna be okay."
Then we all cried together. Something we'd never done before.
"What in Christ name are y'all doing in here? Abby, I'm gonna kill
you!"
I wrung the sleep out of my eyes, and looked into Hilary's angrey face.
"Hilary," I managed to get out, as I scrambled off of the floor.
"Wait till Mom hear about this," Hilary huffed. "I can't believe
y'all. Abby do you know how hurt Wayne is? Do you...."
"Shut up, Hil," Abby hissed. "And if you tell Mom about us, I'll...
I'll.."
"You won't do nothing, but get a bad spanking. And you really do
deserve it."
"Please," I wailed, "don't tell my daddy. We're leaving now."
Helen, who was still on the floor, eyes wide with horror, and hair in
different directions, nodded. She slowly stood up and back up toward the
window.
Hilary shook her head, and opened Abby's door. "MOM! COME HERE NOW!
ABBY'S GOT RED AND THAT GIRL HIDING IN HERE!!"
Helen and I began gathering our stuff in a hurry, but it was no use.
Mr. Choke brust into the room just as we opened the window.
"Stay!" he hollared. "And don't move a muscle. As for you," he
pointed at Abby, "go directly to your mother's and my room, now."
"I'm very disappointed in you girls," Mrs. Choke said, her voice deep
and husky. She shook her head in disgust. "Jesse? Eshianna? Ronda? I
expect it from Red, but you all? You girls have well respected families
in WesBrige. Red," she looked at me and shook her head, "nothing can
take Wayne Harris' blood out of her vain. It's in her."
Mrs. Choke's words stabbed me in the heart like an icicle, and made my
warm blood, cold. She looked at me, her eyes stone, and a cold smile
slithered across her beautiful face, before continueing on.
"I don't know who you are," she nodded at Helen, "but I hear you're
from a well respected family in Sandre. But I also hear you're cousins.
It doesn't surprise me something like this has happened. I would give
you all a good spanking if I could. But," she said as the doorbell rung,
"it's out of my hands."
Dad walked in the house with two police at his side. Caroline came
running in.
"Red! Oh, we missed you! Why'd you do such a horrid thing?" she
smiled at me, but her eyes told me that she wasn't happy at all. That she
wanted me to be gone for good.
Dad sqauted down in front of me.
"Red," he said softly. His eyes were moist, but I knew he wouldn't
cry in front of everyone in the room. He and I starred at eachother, my
eyes cold, his wistful. It seemed as if the whole world had stop
spinning. As if we were the only two people in the world.
Aunt Jenny broke the cold silence when she entered the the kitchen.
"Helen Lila Morris!" she roared, her small, fragile body shaking with
rage. "What the hell were you thinking? You cause disgrace upon the
family name! I regret even marrying your father, because of you!"
Helen covered her face and fled from the room, crying. Aunt Jenny
looked around the room with rage, as if she was going to do something.
One of the policemen cleared his throat. "Um, Mr. and Mrs. Harris,
Mr. and Mrs. Choke, and Mrs. Morris, could we see you outside.
Afterward," he looked at me, "we'd like to see you and your friend. We have some
very important questions to ask y'all."
I sat in the truck between Dad and Caroline, who was looking out of
her window, fumming.
"Now," Dad said glacing at me, "we can talk. Why'd you run away."
I remained quiet, looking straight ahead. Daddy sighed. "Hungrey?
Hardees is just a block away."
"No use in talking to her, Wayne," Caroline spat, "she's obviously
isn't gonna reply. She's sick."
"I ain't sick," I retorted. "You're the one who needs to go to the
clinic. You try hard to live on fanisties and make believe. I, I'm the
one who suffers the pain and hurt from reality."
Caroline was about to protest, but Dad interrupted. "Go in and order
something to eat for us all, Caroline," he commanded, as he pulled into
Hardees.
"Soo..... you wanna talk about it personaly?" Dad asked as soon as
Caroline was gone. When I didn't reply, he sighed deeply. "I guess not,
huh? You must be real mad at me. You ain't talkin' to me, smiling at
me, did you even miss me?"
I took one look at him, and my pride shattered. I let the well of tears
break lose, as I hugged him.
"Shh," he soothed, "it's gonna be okay. I owe you an apology. I'm....
I'm sorry," his words were barely above a whisper, "for, number one,
not being the father that I should've been to you an' Suzie. Two," he
took a deep breath, and looked back to see if Caroline was coming, "sorry
for not telling you about Londa. I really was gonna tell you, I.... I
just wasn't ready. I didn't know how you'd handle it." He hugged me
closer to him. "But as soon as I realized that you had ran away, I knew
that it was my fault. I should've told you earlier." A tear slowly made
its way down his cheek. "I didn't know if I were gonna ever see you
again. I'm sorry," he sniffled.
"It's okay, Daddy. I owe you an apology, too. I'm sorry. I knew you
probably wasn't ready for it anyway. But why did you lie about it? Why
did you let me believe that she was my mother?" I asked quietly.
"I don't know.... I'm sorry."
"You got any pictures of her?" I asked.
"Yeah. Gotta bunch of 'em, too."
"You'll show them to me when we get home, right?"
He nodded. "I got some dresses that belonged to her. Scarfs, hats,
gloves, jackets.... all kind of things. You can have 'em if you want."
"What will Caroline think?"
"To hell with Caroline. I don't give a damn of what she think."
I smiled, and wrapped my other arm around him. "Thank's Dad."
He nodded. "Suzie's with Molly, if ya wanted to know. I'm gonna pick
her up after I drop you an' Caroline home."
"I'm staying alone with her?"
"She won't do nothin' to you. She know better than that.
I looked out of the window to see Caroline comeing back with a big bag
of food.
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