Bread Wars (skits by me)

This is a script for Bread Wars. (Adrian)

Peasant: Well the princess has been kidnapped by the evil witch’s evil second cousin twice removed. I should go save her. The king will probably offer a reward to anyone who can save her. So I am going to save the princess... (Holds up loaf of bread)... with this freshly baked loaf of bread. (Opens mouth with wide eyes and shakes head. Walks off stage saying,*) I HOPE THE REWARD IS BREAD.

Peasant: (three hours later she comes to a large door) Oh no looks like I'll have to break this door down. C'mon bread. (Starts hitting door while holding bread).

Stage hand holds up sign that says: TWO HOURS LATER.

Peasant: (Tired and out of breath) Oh look here's a door knob. Maybe If I just... (Turns the Knob.)

Door opens.

Peasant: (Opens mouth) To the princess! AWAY!!!!! Evil Witches Evil Second Cousin

Twice Removed. Aka the Evil

Witch: So princess are you going to give me the bread or not? (holds out hand)

Princess: (Puzzled) What? Evil

Witch: THE BREAD! (Throws hands in air)

Princess: (While Evil Witch’s back is turned she sticks out tongue)

Peasant: Psst!

Princess turns and joins Peasant.

Princess: About time.

Evil Witch: (Turns around) Hey where did you go?!

Peasant: (Throws piece of Bread and hits Evil Witch in the face)

Evil Witch: OWW! Oh no! I broke a nail!

Princess: Nice shot.

Peasant: (Throws another piece of Bread) This time the Bread hits some random kid in the audience.

Kid That Plays No Part In This What So Ever: (Bends over and picks up bread) I HAVE BREAD!!!!

Princess: (Shakes her head in her hand)

Peasant: Oops.

Princess: Let’s just go.

Three hours later the Peasant returns the Princess back to the palace.

King: As a reward for returning my daughter you may have her hand in marriage.

Peasant: Um I’m a girl.

King: (Stands up) Oh really I thought you were a boy. Then you shall have my bread. May it serve you well.

Peasant: (Gets Bread and puts some in her pocket) SWEET!!