60 ways to annoy Voldemort!
in the quest for the next great Prophicy (and back!)
May 22nd, 2010
AN: A better name would be 60 ways to commit suicide.
1. Reenact Teletubbies
2. Follow him around with a taser.
3. Sell his Horocruxes on eBay.
4. Sign him up to guest star on Hannah Montana.
5. Attack him with your Light Saber.
6. Invite me *Bree* to a Death Eater meeting.
7. Send him a cheesy Valentine, in July.
8. Give him a gift card to Claire's or Forever 21.
9. Suggest he needs a haircut.
10. Get him a FaceBook.
11. Throw him a Dora the Explorer birthday party.
12. Make a heart with your hands and look at him through it.
13. Make him a friendship bracelet, and insist that he wears it.
14. Write a song about him, and sing it outside a Death Eater meeting as loud as you can.
15. Give him a portrait of yourself.
16. Start a fanclub, and give out Voldemort shirts, dolls, and bumper stickers.
17. Suggest he gets a new hobby, like knitting.
18. Ask him to be in your YouTube series.
19. Walk in to a Death Eater meeting with a rifle, wetsuit, and a trycicle, then shout "LET'S DO THIS!"
20. Rename him "The Riddler."
21. Every time he says something you don't understand, ask, "Was that a riddle?"
22. Tell him you love doing riddles.
23. Give him a can of spray-on tan.
24. Tell him pink is the new black.
25. Pat him on the head and give him flowers every time his plans are foiled.
26. Send Bellatrix a love letter, sign it as him.
27. Suggest his name's Anakin and Harry's name is Luke.
28. Take him to Disney Land.
29. Video tape him freaking out on It's A Small World.
30. Read Twilight to him.
31. Dye all his robes Pink and Yellow. Then say, "Die? Oooh... I thought you ment dye!"
32. Get him a membership for a Harry Potter fanclub.
33. Bribe people to go on the dark side by using cookies.
34. Two words: Marco Polo!
35. Award him gold stars.
36. Slap him on the arm and say "mosquito" every few seconds.
37. After every Death Eater meeting, get in a huddle and shout, "GOOOOOOOOOOO DEATH EATRS!"
38. Teach him how to fix a light bulb.
39. Take him to a yoga class.
40. Whenever he's going to the annual good vs. evil fight in June, sing "We're Off to See the Wizard!"
41. Buy him a speedo.
42. Put a note that says, "From Bellatrix" on it.
43. Have him judge a Adam Lambert vs. Siobhan Magnus screaming contest.
44. Get him a nose job.
45. Name your pigmy puff Voldemort.
46. Buy him a Darth Vader costume.
47. Put a slideshow together of all the times he was defeated. Force him to watch it.
48. Demand cookies.
49. Dress up as the Grim Reaper. Stand behind him, tapping an hourglass.
50. Get Lady Gaga to make Death Eater masks.
51. Make him watch the movie Bolt. Tell him the dog's Harry in animagus form.
52. Ask him why he doesn't have a scar as cool as Harry's.
53. Force him and Bellatrix to reenact Romeo and Juliet.
54. Put him in the time out chair every time he does anything evil.
55. Ask if he's having his midlife crisis.
56. But him a Firebolt.
57. Ask him to dye Easter eggs with you.
58. At Christmas.
59. Bake him lightning shaped cookies.
60. Lock him in a room with Peeves. Bid on who will come out alive.
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HAHAHA! lol! THIS IS SO FUNNY!
ZOE: What are you going to do the darth Vader theme or something? KAITLIN: you mean imperial march ZOE: I said that! JESUS! KAITLIN: Yeah, he did say some things. -- Eye Spy Vaaren Salvation: Total awesomness (me to dragonwriter. aaaw)
HAHAHA! lol! THIS IS SO FUNNY!
ZOE: What are you going to do the darth Vader theme or something? KAITLIN: you mean imperial march ZOE: I said that! JESUS! KAITLIN: Yeah, he did say some things. -- Eye Spy Vaaren Salvation: Total awesomness (me to dragonwriter. aaaw)
did i just do that?
ZOE: What are you going to do the darth Vader theme or something? KAITLIN: you mean imperial march ZOE: I said that! JESUS! KAITLIN: Yeah, he did say some things. -- Eye Spy Vaaren Salvation: Total awesomness (me to dragonwriter. aaaw)
...THAT WAS HILARIOUS!!! I love #47! Did you make these up? You are so talented at making funny things like these :)
"Patrick! You forgot how to eat again! Come on, I'll get the funnel!" - Spongebob Squarepants
Yep. I found it in my notebook.
If most of your favorite charecters are villans, put this in your sig so you can creep people out.
Save the trees. Start by not doing homework.
These were good :)
It's probably not a wise descision to tell Bella that Edward Cullen's real name is Cedric Diggory~my friend
"I've gotta jar of di-irt, I've gotta jar of di-irt!"-Jack Sparrow ;) gotta love it, savvy
I found a list of 101 ways to annoy voldemort and none of these were on there! This is hilareous. One of my faves from the other list is do a finger puppet show of all of his battles with Harry and give them both high squeeky voices.
Don't judge a man until you've walked two moons in his moccasins. In the course of a lifetime what does it matter. You'll never know the worth of water until the well is dry.--Walk Two Moons
I like #43!:D Adam Lambert would probably win though.XP
<~*Savanna/GermanNinjaToast*~>
"Conquest is made from the ashes of one's enemies."~Starscream
"You either die as a hero; or live long enough to see yourself as a villian."~The Dark Knight
ha ha ha he he he he lol lol lol lol!!!
If you're a serial killer, GET AWAY FROM ME! If you're a cereal killer, GET AWAY FROM MY FRUIT LOOPS!
me: grandmother, you do know lol means laugh out loud, right Grandma: what do you mean? I thought it meant lots of love. me: ooh! thats why you always end your txts and emails with lol.
LOLZ LOVE IT! FAVING .... 51 and 60 are my favorites
“You're only given a little spark of madness. You mustn't lose it.” - Robin Williams
"Guess who made WAFFLES?" ~ GIR
You ares so funny! I've read a lot of your stuff and you are great! You have a future in comedy writing!! My fave is number 50.
H-I-L-A-R-I-O-U-S! Bree, you are...amazing! Soooooooooooooooooooooooooo indescribably funny! I like 54, 51, 36, 30, 2, 5, 12, and 21! wow, that's a lot of things I really liked! Get this...........call me crazy (cuz I am!) but I have never read harry Potter. and I still found it hilarious!
*{I keep trying to kidnap Jasper, but every time, Alice is at the window with a baseball bat, waiting for me. How does she kn--ohh, right.}*
that was so funny i love it but u should add 'tell him that his hiding places were wimpy and that the media is coming or something like that
Omg i looooove this! Especially the harry potter fan club one!
"Oh, when you said "psycho freak" I got a picture of this old woman running across your lawn and stealing lawn ornaments and smashing windows... >_< " Sandy on KidPub
Are you ALWAYS this funny?
Ahhhhh, you made my day! I actually laughed out loud - well, I do that a lot but I laughed seriously loud. I swear the roof moved I was laughing so hard!!! Great job, do something else like this PLEASE IM BEGGING YOU!!!!
x-_-_Emma_-_-x
I like number 19. xD You're hilarious!!
I don't have any favorites. This is just too funny. I laughed out loud! 'Cause when you actually picture yourself and Voldemort doing this stuff, it's hilarious!
Well, one problem. If you even suggested any of these, he'd probably point his wand at you and say "Avada Kadavra"
How did you come up with these?
Genius!!!!!!!!!
Looking for an epic fantasy story to read? Read my story, The Chosen. http://www.kidpub.com/book-page-or-chapter/chosen-chapter-one-1815109727
I like the begining ones. THEY ARE HILARIOUS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I LOVE THEM!! SO FUNNY, Im laughing while I write this. 1 through 17 are the best I think, o and 38,39, 40 and 60. Plus the Yoga class one, Im laughing soo loud right now, even though its not in caps lock. Keep writing funny lists.
Maria
I kept imagining Voldemort's face whenever you did something on the list!!!!!! HA HA HA!!!! I am still laughing! GREAT idea!!! :) :) :) :)
