Posted December 7th, 2012 by rebecca
A Book Review by Rebec
in Rivendell, the only place in Middle Earth that gets Wi-Fi
Being British and a grammar Nazi, one thing I love about this piece is the power of correction. The word 'mommy' is practically non-existant, and instead, the coloquial word for mother is 'mum' or 'mummy', which would of course be the word Nathan would most likely use. Having said that, it would only confuse some more simple minded Americans. Perhaps it ought to be kept as it is.
So far as characters go, the best is perhaps Leon. When one reads his sections, you know he is one of the characters the author really has put a lot of effort into. He is amazing in that I would very much like to maim him with a pickaxe. Otherwise, there appear to be certain miniscule cliches in the three major characters and how they become intertwined. Kaitlyn is irrelevent as she is minor, Allie is not so bad, and neither is Nathan. How Nathan comes to the school and his perfection seem annoying at first, but with the explanation as it is, it is tolerable, besides, he's a sarky so-and-so. That automatically makes him cool in my books. Actually, it isn't the characters that are so cliched, it's the premise, until, of course, Nathan's revelation.
The basis of the story is that the prologue is not understandable but will one day be explained to us properly. After that, we are following the life of a girl named Allie, as she goes to school in a pretty boring manner. Straight away we meet her best friend and the new boy, Nathan, a stranger from 'across the pond', as the insane school teacher likes to put it. Nathan really isn't normal, as we see when he beats the best runner - and biggest idiot - Jake in a race without breaking into a sweat. Some sort of special powers. Oh, and did I forget to mention his parent's murder? That all comes to a head at the annual lock-in, a phrase I have never heard prior to this and cannot imagine where Nathan would have heard it considering it is never used in Antartica, Germany, the United Kingdom or the Bahamas to my knowledge. Jake has been possessed by a psychotic freak named Leon - who is awesome if a little irritating - and Nathan is almost killed. It is revealed he is an awesome magic dude because of a curse, which is a fantastic explanation for his powers. Nathan lives alone but a girl called Alex keeps an eye on him. Alex is pretty cool - she saves them from a supposedly good psychotic magic guy who wants to kill Allie because he can't wipe her memory now. Now there's two groups that Nathan's in trouble with, as the Council remove his powers which is a lovely form of execution. Just as the fragment I have read ends, Nathan and Allie are heading up the mountain the curse came from, and there is definitely someone waiting for them...
Possibly the worst thing about this is the description: it has more one sentence paragraphs than I have ever seen. The writing istelf is of fantastic quality. In fact, forget what I said about cliches, there now are none. This was amazing. I have upmost respect for the writer of this, inventing a hidden world within our own.
For the author:
Detail your paragraphs better and find someone who knows more British English to help with Nathan's vocabulary. Continue writing this. It might not really be my type of fiction, but I recognise talent when I see it.
See more stories by Rebec