You're not stupid, so the stupid majority doesn't want to ask you

That made me feel a lot better! :)

you know things are going to be great when you're discussing w/ your mom what you should wear to you aunts wedding (which is a gay wedding) and she says "well, just to get all the stereotypes out in the open..."
she then talked for 5 minutes about how most lesbians are fat and dress weird and are ugly "so no matter what you won't stand out that much"
it was great
then she proceeded to talk about me slouching and not standing up straight and told me "I just feel like you're miserable with yourself and I want you to be proud of who you are" hahahhahaaaaa fuck off
every time I think it would be fine if my parents knew I'm gay some shit like this happens

It really pisses me off when ppl say something rude and then compliment you in a weak attempt to make up for insulting you and then they think once they give you a lame compliment everything is perfectly okay. News flash: it is not. One cliche compliment does not make up for you being a jerk.

I should honestly just shoot caffeine into my veins at this point cos all I wanna do is sleep

Smh, I'm mad at myself rn. I made a poetry blog that's supposed to be family friendly and promised to myself that the next poem I'd make will be posted on the blog. It has a trigger warning. *Sigh*.

o hey everyone who posted on this welcome to 1962, all the beatles were alive back then :l

mcr made me cry
 

so I was just singing songs by the beatles with chimbot (look him up) and then after singing a bit of yesterday and then he sang these words I couldn't tell I got confused because that wasn't the lyrics to yesterday and I'm like "that sounds like something my chemical romance would make" (ps I dont listen to mcr) then I looked it up and it was my chemical romance and I clapped to my self to hard and ran around the basement in happiness and I got so emotional. I HAD NO IDEA HOW I PREDICTED THIS?!?!?!?!? IT WAS KIDS FROM YESTERDAY OR WHATEVER IT'S CALLED BY MCR AND I HAVE NO IDEA ABOUT ANY SONGS BY MCR EXCEPT FOR CANCER (ahahahha dont take that the other way) AND THIS LIKE MADE ME SO DKJCKLSUHSHAWAVHNWA

my best friend thinks I'm the one who fights with her friends but they're the ones who fight with me. Every time she's there, she defends me. Every time she has to go, they do it behind her back. Every time I tell her what happened, she loses her friends. I told them I've had enough of gender assuming and I get emotional when people do it on purpose, they kept on doing it. they wouldn't stop. how can I make this stop.

I thought you all should know that I was crying at like, midnight but then my cat came into my room and stepped on me and snuggled up and it took 30 seconds flat for her to calm me down. She's so warm and soft and pure.
Moral of the story; cats r best.

awwww

tenchar

why am i so dumb sometimes

U gotta account for a learning curve.

Except when I'm idiot even tho I know better

Everybody does that though so it's okay, you know? Being an idiot sometimes is normal.

(What happen?)

Thanks. I just beat myself up for stupid things a lot. And it’s nothing just ruined a relationship with one of the people I value most by being reckless instead of shy for once. Ugh I’m such a drama queen omg.

Do you ever have one of those days where you're in a super bad mood for some reason (or for no reason, whatever) and you know you just have to make it through the dayand you'll be okay? But then the people around feel the need to, remind you? Constantly?? That you're mood is awful???

I don't understand that, like I'm not at all irritable most of the time so if I'm acting grouchy then maybe that might be a hint that I'm having a bad day? And you should leave me alone? Maybe?? Am I Not Allowed to be done with the world once in a while? It costs Zero (0) effort for people to just shut up and not point out that I'm not a ray of sunshine so like...why bother.

Rant @ my mom, mostly.

Okay yeah, things like that happen *all* the time and sometimes it sticks, but most of the time it doesn't. Tbh every teenager in the world is a massive drama queen at some point, especially over relationships, so it'll be a big deal now but it'll end up okay. You just have to wait til things are a bit calmer and then try and make things up with the other person.

*Hands u an internet bandage* as long as you don't beat urself up too hard.

Thanks for your advice and support! It really helped! :)
We haven't *quite* talked again because I'm too nervous about it and stuff, but I will try to soon. As far as I can tell, it seems salvageable.

I'll try not to haha.

the amount of deadness of KidPub makes me want to kms

apparently using the apparently kid meme on your online friends over 100 times makes you lose them. cri *no rlly I cried they were such good friends I loved them so much DDX*

Full offense but I hate WriterHub

annoyed -.-
 

so like there's this user on deviantart (not to name any fucking names here but.... her name is Fandom-OC-Queen lmao) that's being so annoying. Like she's nice sometimes but she's so rude and drama-causing and controlling.

She has like five billion OCs, mostly female straight OCs shipped with hot/cute/popular canon males. And mostly, she just has pixel-art icons of each of her canon/OC ships holding hands, and there's not even very much information on each ship or OC. Gives me the impression that she just really wanted to ship with canons.

TBH I don't really see how she earned 1000 followers other than through sheer volume of uploads

She posts passive-aggressive status updates aalalll th e time

She's so, like... Entitled. She's very close-minded to multishipping in general and especially anyone else's OC who is paired with the same beloved canon she/her OC like. SooooooOOoo annoying, God.

And like, I tried very much to be nice or at least civil. Gosh, what a waste of time and space

Is this petty? yea
Do I care? nop

how do you stop feeling things for people who don't feel the same way

I miss everyone :/ I really wanna make KP better

^



EY EY IT's 1964

Me too honestly

i always thought i was high functioning for being mentally ill but then i go and drop college and put off driving and find out i might have ocd on top of everything else

aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa hi

well like, shit ain't easy and I'm bad at helping people but like it's ok if ur not ready to do things yet and don't think of it as "oh great I have another disorder" but like that a problem has been identified that can be treated it's like one step closer to improving ily

I've started to doubt whether things that happened earlier this year even happened at all. Pretty out of it at the moment
Also bummed that this place kind of died before I was able to really engage with the community

hey bein' bummed for a bit is fine but mind you don't stay there! i'm still here and we can interact...slowly...

oh boy I gotchu about the weird memory stuff.
and yes! like grace, i'm still here. we'll bring kp back to life... eventually

Appreciate it guys, thanks
And yeah the memory thing was just totally tripping me out yesterday, lol I'm just trying not to dwell on it

memory is hard sometimes man.

I have a bit of a vent, I guess.
So my family has had bad experiences with dogs. My older sister has wanted a dog for as long as she can remember and so my mother has tried a couple times, always with catastrophic results. Or Dog-astrophic.

Anyhow, we ran into two puppies and took them in a few weeks ago. All was going well for once and I was quite enchanted by the littermates. I've been busy with school so I didn't have much time to play with them, but they were really cute.

Today they got out unattended and one of them got hit by a car. She's dead and her brother's alone.

oh god
that's really awful im sorry. it sucks when pets die tbh its just really really terrible and I'm super bad at empathizing but I hope the brother is ok

Current mood: I’m v pissed and don’t want to be here for one more second but I’m trying to not show it bc I know it won’t do anything

bitchhh
i miss kidpub.
its as much a home to me as the one i've lived in all my life
bitch im crying ugh

same
Me all the time ughhhh

so I'm trying to apply to other schools which is a huge process with applications and essays and recommendations and interviews and crazy shit. and I feel bad because I'm currently at a school I had to apply to but ok. and I have to re-take the SSAT which was hella stressful, and then some schools need incoming juniors to take the SAT as well so now I'm taking both and I have 11 days (including today) to study for the SAT. I'm a fucking sophomore why am I doing this to myself. and I also need to ask my teachers who I love to write recommendations so that I can leave my current school and I just think that sucks so much and I feel awful about it. also I'm just not ready to take the SAT all the seniors are doing a ton of prep for it and I cant join the study groups because I'm a sophomore so I have to do everything all on my own again and its awful

I don't really even know what's up with my emotions anymore? Somedays I'm completely fine and I love where I am, the people around me, what I'm doing... I can even tolerate myself. But then other days it's just this hot, oozing mess of anger and resentment and this need to hurt people and I know the way I act when I feel that way is wrong, and so are the things I want to do, but I just can't stop. I know I'm being a (*ahem* if you are smol cover your ears (or I guess in this case eyes)) fucking bitch, I know I'll regret it later, hell I regret it in the moment but I just can't stop, I hate the way I act, I hate the people around me and myself and every single thing that comes out of their mouths is infuriating and Makes me want to hurt them, I want to hurt everyone, even myself. I want to wreck everything I want to ruin my relationships, I want to hurt the people around me, mentally and physically, and it makes me feel sick and I hate it and even though I despise it I just keep going and I don't know why it just doesn't stop even though I know when it ends all I'll have done for myself is create a big mess and make myself miserable and just ugh. All I want to do is destroy things, break them beyond repair, make people realize that I can and will hurt them. I just feel so angry and gross and I don't know.
And then when it's over, it's just... over. The anger always comes suddenly, with little warning, and it goes the same way. Within minutes I feel either normal or hollow but either way I never really feel bad about it until later, its hard to explain I guess? I don't know.
And then other days I just feel so sad and it happens just like the rage but instead of wanting to stab people all I want to do is curl up and cry about anything and everything. I try to think about happy things but all I can think about are my mistakes and everything I hate about myself and how much other people must hate me and I try to grasp onto any positive thought but it's just a slippery slope of negitivity and tears. And it it lasts for so long, feeling like it's dragging me down forever and when it's gone I feel so exhausted.
And both things always happen so quickly over practically nothing and I just don't really know what to do with myself anymore.
Maybe I'm just emotional, idk. Anyway, sorry for bothering you and wasting your time.