apologies for the terrible "advice" TT-TT
 

hey, this is totally okay. it's okay to feel sad every now and then, but sometimes it turns into more than sadness, doesn't it?

i know the "real issues" and the big problems are hard to address, and avoiding them is the easiest and hardest thing in the world to do. i don't have much to say about that because i'm still working through things like that myself. but one bit of advice: be open to change. even if you can't fix those things, be open to at least trying whatever changes have been forced upon you because of a situation.

And be you. I know the world will say "oh, yeah, be yourself (but only if you're the ideal human being who is a size -2 but totally healthy and who only thinks of pleasing men and looking hot and also being super smart and clever and just overall perfection)" but screw that. because you can love the little things about you. Hey, maybe I'm not the smartest person in the world and maybe i do get my dumb moments every now and then, but that doesn't mean I should hate myself for it and that doesn't mean i don't have the potential. Or maybe it does mean that i should stop focusing on being smart and that this is just another stepping stone towards my true personality. because, honestly, you don't just get bad days because that's what happens.

I think we get bad days and terrible situations and hard problems because they will help us grow and become who we were meant to be. life isn't hating us, it's trying to guide us. and sometimes that guidance becomes really forceful and it will hurt. but just keep pointing yourself towards that goal of a better, future you. and keep in mind that YOU SHOULD KNOW NOTHING ABOUT THIS PERSON. i know it sounds weird, but in order to get to your goal, you can't have a goal. you have to work towards whatever traits and personality you think you want to be, but the possibilities of who you will be and what life events will shape your characteristics are literally endless. so there's almost no way to say "yeah, i'm gonna be that person" because, really, you're gonna be You and that You is someone mysterious and amazing and you're just going to have to get to know them as slowly as the rest of us do.

I know this probably doesn't help or make sense. Sorry. ;_; but just keep pushing on towards that invisible goal because someday you'll get there and you'll be that amazing person you were truly meant to be. just keep moving forward (and screw life for forcing such terrible things onto you because life is so hard and there are so many things that everyone has had to deal with. so kudos to humans for going through with this tragedy called life, and screw the world for helping influence the issues we face in life)

its 5:30pm, im tired, i hate myself (suicide, alcohol, meds tw) dont quote :)
 

it wouldnt let me delete my bullshit letter so have this

i just want to never feel an emotion again

emotions are fun though like falling in love and stuff

although maybe that was kind of a bad example

i need to tell someone but i cant sometimes venting isnt enough sometimes i need more im insatiable ill never ever get what im looking for idk idk idk idk what im saying anymore i just need to but i have no one i dont know i just dont know why am i even doing this what is my purpose even maybe tomorrow will distract me maybe maybe idkkkk
ok bye this was a waste ofspace

i dont want to trigger anything ever ill just shut up and keep these pent up feelings of idk what to myself what am i even feeling i dont know why am i doing this why do i keep doing this

i AM AROMANTIC
andcoldandbroken

why the hell am i on this thread anyways

nonononono i do not feel emotions why do i try to help people with theirs

think about this:
everything you have ever felt is literally a communication between two neurons in your brain. your emotions are all electrical signals.
just think about that for a moment.
isn't it fascinating?