Thank goodness.
I love animals, and if that happened to me, I'd just take the dog.

Loved it.
Thank you so much.

Ugh. I feel like my "group of friends" keep casting me out and trying to get me to find other friends. People think I'm weird. I've only had them. Well now I don't. They feel like they have to "hire" people to be friendly with me. Ugh.

I'm upset.
Lately my dog has been peeing on things when we leave the house (some of it might be one of my cats-- she used to pee on things a lot). Every time my mom is so angry and she threatens to get rid of the dog and I just don't know how to handle it. I've offered to clean it up, and she always says no and that she would never make me do that, but honestly, I would clean it up every single time if it meant keeping my dog safe. We're not even completely sure it's her! Like I said before, my one cat had a problem that's kind of on and off now, where she'd pee in laundry baskets, rugs, pretty much anything but the litter box.
If it is my dog, I think that it's because she's loosing control of it. Because she used to go on newspaper that we left down in my basement for her when we were gone. It's only now that it's some where different.
I'm sorry this post is really weird. I'm just really upset and don't know what to do. I doubt anything similar has happened to any of you, because this story is just a little odd, but advice on what to do or say to my mom would help me out.

thats how i feel too like im switching meds possibly soonish and i really dont want to because some of the side effects of the ones i might switch to include WEIGHT GAIN and ive just gotten myself down to a goodish number and i really dont want to gain weight oh god even if the meds help my brain that side effect will NOT if anything i could stand to lose five more pounds so i really cant afford to gain anymore at this point (the reason i like my old meds is cuz right after i started taking them ive dropped like three-four pounds and that made me happier than the actual medication ever did and so far i think ive been keeping off the weight ((my parents took away my scale so now i cant know for sure but at my doctor's appointments i think im doing ok)) and i cant gain it back i can't)

i wish u weren't on meds tbh but i hope they're working i really do i want/need you to get better plz mhm
what

anyway im kinda happy bc for the first time (in forever) my parents are letting me go SHOPPING with a friend without an adult with us. so that's cool, im excited, first time for her too. then we're seeing a movie. yeaaaaa

I hear you.
:(
My friends are acting really familiar with me, now, since I just moved there for about five months.
I kinda like it that they're acting so nice and arrogant with me at the same time, that's what friends are about, fights, fights, and more fights.

i don't want to be on meds, either. i take them for the same reason hazel goes to support group: to keep my parents happy. much like hazel's support group (until gus shows up, of course), the meds are insufficient and ineffective. there are no isaacs in my meds. no guses there either. no perks of being on medication, except the aforementioned reason.
but honestly (and i have known this now for a very long time), fighting my depression is absolutely pointless. it's pointless to go to therapy. i just exercise my tear ducts while my therapist tries to pinpoint Why I Am The Way I Am and not, say, What Do To About The Way I Am Since It's Not Changing Any Time Soon Since My Meds Are Useless. and the psychiatrist doesn't help with all of his "how's your mood been this week?" well, ups and downs. it's always ups and downs with me. i know that when i am up, i will eventually come down. and when i am down, it is a constant fight between actively trying to go up and just laying there basking in contented misery. my mood shifts frequently, violently, and depends largely on the people whom i am with. a laugh makes me laugh. anger makes me mad. ignorance also makes me mad. sadness makes me downcast. i feed off of others. i am a leech. i only suck your poison to share it with you, not to lessen the pain. i am useless, and so is this fight. i know that no matter how many times i am suicidal, i have no method with which i can actually kill myself, nor the gall and ability to actually do so. i am still not allowed at home for extended periods of time, so i literally don't have the time to kill myself. and anyway, when it gets that bad, i rather enjoy it. at least i know i'm deserving of the bad emotions.
saying that to my ex-therapist is what almost got me hospitalized. but i'm not giving up, really. i'm just accepting my inevitable fate, which is that i will always be distressed and stressed and depressed. once i move out of this stifling household things will be better. i live for the day i am freed from the toxic environment my parents have nourished me with, because without the poison i will die, and be reborn to wherever my life takes me. i'm adaptable. i'm adjustable. put me on and i will fit to however you need me to be. i'll be okay. and i'm sorry, because this got incredibly long again and is generally a waste of your time in terms of reading material. i'll silence myself now and go do something. probably not homework. no, definitely not.

ok your therapist is very useless if they're not doing anything about how to change it, they're dwelling in the past
all i can say is i love you and i hope you get better

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and i 100% get you with the leech emotion thing i do that too okay ive made this bout me i feel bad goodbye

no it's fine i always do the same thing. don't worry about it, honestly. i love you too (: