Well, it depends how you are mature. My kids at school act "mature" by punching people and looking cool but they're really not. =___= How is your maturity playing?

By mature, I mean being quiet in class, respecting the teacher and stuff. XP Uh, pretty good.

Oh, that maturity is exquistive and fine. :P Being mature that way is what teachers except you to do or else DETENTION starts. >_> I'm going into high school next year but most of the kids in my school (primary school) think I should already be in Year 10 the way I am acting as mature. I don't muck around too much but only a little bit though I do never get in trouble. Sometimes the teachers loves to play along to--he's like 25--and he is one of those cool teachers that you do't need to worry about until...this one moment where one kid dacked another kid and that resulted in something really bad. x//_//x SORRY FOR LONG RAMBLE.

Or you could get a detention for not doing homework... which is one of the two reasons why I get detentions. The other reason is being late for school, which kind of isn't fair for me since I live ages away from the school. -.- And no matter what you get the detention for, the line you have to write is always the same. x_x You're still in primary school at age 12? o-o Things work a lot differently in Australia. I have some of them teachers too, but they don't go to the extent where they don't teach the lesson at all. XD Nah, it's okay.

I have a question for you about Death Days. How would you feel if I switched from Vincent's perspective of the story, to another persons perspective? Would that be confusing or anything? >.<

Bold 1: I don't know, but I think I never did. It always took me a while to register that I existed.
Bold 2: Hang on to that and work from there. Don't think too badly of that Yourself.
Bold 3: I don't think so. I often do that.

No... no no no NO. I know you're hurting right now. I know how it feels. But if you're going as far as planning your own funeral... you need to get help. Even though I don't know you, I really care about you. STAY STRONG <3

Well the mirror thing, I think, shows that you're not egocentric. And you know how people say that they know their friend better than they know themselves? Talk to your friends in real life, and on KP.
I realize that that's kind of off topic.
But I think it's a part of growing up. Losing sight of who you are a little.

Not really. I do it, sometimes. It doesn't necessarily mean that you subconsciously want to die.

I did at first when everything was simpler but now I can't even think of things about me that are POSITIVE.
....right. but this is the girl who wrote herself a self-hate letter last night and it's the first thing she's written in days and it's not the first self-hate letter she's written herself
Good. Mostly I work on the music. I like the thought of constant music and less boring, sniffly speeches.

No. Like, the music. At my funeral.

...I just really want to have good songs when I'm dead.
It doesn't mean I want to be dead.
I don't know my friends anymore, really. We're so similar but so different and it's the differences that keep pushing us apart when in the first place it was the similarities that pulled us together.
I hope so.

Good. I'm mainly just putting together the soundtrack.

...that's mainly what my funeral's going to be, I think. A soundtrack of my life.

I feel like such an arsloche (sp? It's in German) right now. My problems go about as deep as appearance. You have let yourself fall so deep into this hole you've dug that you're losing sight of everything, and I've let this happen to you accidentally and I am SO sorry. You're my best friend. It's my JOB to protect you, and I'm horrible at it. Since your parents are dicks, I should help take care of you in a noncreepy way and I'm really sorry Heather.
You know what?
Sometime after school this week, you should come to my house. We can walk to a park, and sit by ourselves, and you can freaking talk. Tell me everything. In person, not a stupid email. And I have more to say but I have to go. Email me. <3 you.

I was playing tag and waiting to ambush someone, and she's there interrogating me, giving away my position... "What are you doing?!" "Why are you scared?" "You ARE scared, you're looking around. What did you do?" "I'll tell." (Just to sum some of her phrases...)

YOU'RE A MIRACLE!!! YOUR BRAIN IS PROCESSING THE INFORMATION THAT YOU SEE ON THIS SCREEN, AND INTERPRETING IT IN A FEW MILISECONDS AND IT'S SENDING SIGNALS TO YOUR FINGERS GLIDING ACROSS YOUR FREAKING KEYBOARD! YOU HAVE A STOMACH THAT BREAKS DOWN THE FOOD YOU JUST DIGESTED TO USE THEM AS NUTRIENTS AND YOUR LUNGS ARE TAKING IN OXYGEN TO HELP YOU MOVE! YOU'RE PRACTICALLY AN INTRICATE WORK OF LIVING ART! :p

......just like pretty much everyone else in the world, yes, I am. And unique, too.
(I don't know German don't ask me.) But you let yourself fall, too, honey. 3: I'm sorry too. I didn't know what to think when you were migrating further and further away from me and I'm shit at email confrontations, as I think I've told everyone at least 5 times here, and I just didn't know what to do and so all I did was sit and wait and hope but then I kind of gave up on that and reverted back to thinking that there was something wrong with me. But, apology accepted. How could I not?
We should. But maybe not after school, because my parents don't like that s---. And it's easier for me over email, but... I'll try. We'll see. We'll do something. <3 you too.

I just drew a halfway decent picture. I am currently satisfied.

Well, that's better than no improvement at all, right? <:^) O.0 Inspirational thingy? What do you mean by that and why do you feel like you need to give me one...? I just want you to feel better. ;w;

Aaaagghhhh, hormones just make everything SO MUCH MORE FUN, don't they? x_x I hope your cold goes away soon. (And no seizures, now... XD XD DX DX)

O_0 I didn't think you meant it in a bad way, don't worry. ^_^

Sorry to keep you in the dark like this...I WANT to tell you and bunch of other people about it. I want to scream it from the rooftops that this seemingly angelic person is a monster, but I can't. x_x

You're welcome, buddy. <:^J *bear hug* XD You'll think of HSPs? Why? Because I'm one? XD

No, you're not. :c

I walk down the street
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk
I fall in.
I am lost...I am helpless
It isn't my fault
It takes forever to find a way out

I walk down the street
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk
I pretend that I don't see it
I fall in again.
I can't believe I am in this same place.
But, it isn't my fault
It still takes a long time to get out

I walk down the same street
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk
I see it is there
I still fall in...
It's a habit, but my eyes are open
I know where I am
It is my fault
I get out immediately

I walk down the same street
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk
I walk around it

I walk down another street


^^I love this poem, and thought it kinda related to what you and Heather were talking about. It reeeeallly hits home with me, so that's why I love it so much. :/

(*whispers*)
We're all bad people...

generalized anxiety disorder:
Difficulty concentrating
Fatigue
Irritability
Problems falling or staying asleep, and sleep that is often restless and unsatisfying
Restlessness, and often becoming startled very easily

I have all of these symptoms... ._.

That's me except for 'becoming startled very easily'. I'm kind of unphasable after being in the circus for awhile...

Well, no two flowers are the same are they?

Of course not. They've all been trampled and battered in different ways, and some have closed in on themselves because of it, but the true treasured ones are the ones who have the courage to bloom again.

...I'm the former.

Perhaps I should have used diamonds ._.

There are lots of things you can compare people to. Diamonds and flowers are just two. And sometimes, with the help of the sun, those flowers may one day gain the strength to bloom.

You can compare people and life to so many different things, even those things that don't contain traces of people or life (so much), and I'm still trying to figure out why.

I think of myself as a rock in the bottom of a river. I'm bumped and jostled by all the other rocks that lift away and go with the current, but I'm stubborn, and I like my mucky mud sticking me to the bottom, but I don't know where the other rocks go and if it's better there and I'm caught between realizing that it's time to leave and knowing that I want to stay.

You don't know if you're the former until you try being the latter.
And you are the latter, btw.

Do you ever think back to earlier grades and really REALLY miss your old friends? ;w; Lately, I can't stop thinking about this kid I knew in 6th grade. I miss him a lot...I never knew anyone that could make me laugh so much. I remember, one day, after I had a horrible migraine, I was sitting in the lunch room, holding my head...I was too sick to eat...I felt horrible, and was stressing over something on top of it. After promptly stealing my pumpkin muffin and teasing me about something random, he suddenly realized I still wasn't feeling well. Then he told me what has to be the funniest joke about Americans that I've EVER HEARD. X'D He just kept firing joke after joke at me, and after a while, I actually started to feel better. I remember all the times kids picked on me for being different, and he always went after them like a mad dog.


... *le sigh*
I wonder if he ever thinks about me. :(

;w; Is this the Max guy?

o_0 What? ... Ohhh, no, no, I knew that guy in, like...2nd or 3rd grade. XD Nah. The person I'm talking about I met in 5th grade, but we were mortal enemies until 6th, then just suddenly became best friends. ... Yes, I'm aware it was odd. XD

...I feel that way with this girl that I knew that I was best friends with. She was the only person that was EXTREMELY nice to me and she had so much in common with me! #_# Then, of course, I had to move schools and begin school with a bunch of idiots that I didn't know. And now I am friends with this other reader girl! (Yeah. I ACTUALLY have friends, guise.)

AAAAASH?
/youthere

No :D
*sorry butted in*

KENDRA! GET ON AN! I HAVE SOMETHING TO TELL YOUUUU. :D ^_^
i

When did I say I was going to give you a hug? :^?

Me as well.

I care, Lily. I care.

You wanna talk about it?