Wednesday is going to suck.

A test.

A surgery.

And (possibly/probably) a death.

I feel so, so sick.

D: *hugs*
if you want to vent in more detail, it's fine to do it here, or you can email me if you want…
I hope things are at least okayish.

What happened? I just joined. Was there like someone who hacked in and messed it up or something? Because I think right now its fine. :D Also, is there a way to favorite threads?

Dog has cancer. On Wednesday, they've having the surgery to determine if he'll live or not. If he won't, they'll put him to sleep. And I want to puke.

(I know, the last part was TMI...)

:eek: Noooooo!!! Don't die!!!

that's terrible… D: I hope he'll live… I know how bad it is to lose a pet.

I didn't make it. And I feel horrible and useless and upset. But you know what? I will be amazing wherever I go. I'm only thirteen. I still have a next time.

Didn't make what?
You're not horrible and useless. D: YOU WILL BE AMAZING. YOU ARE AMAZING.
A little something is waiting for you in your inbox to make you feel better.

hello i am blasting defying gravity (chris colfer's version) on repeat until it burns out my f---ing eardrums
i am very happy right now
but
i'm not happy at all
do you see what i f---ing mean
it's like
i should be happy right now
i should totally be happy
there is no f---ing reason in the whole damned world why i should not be happy right now
hahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhaahhahaah hahahahaha
WHY AM I NOT HAPPY
GODDAMMIT
HAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAH
YOU CNA"t FBIRNG ME THE FUcOK DOWN BITCH
ODSIHFHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAA:LFH
please kill me

The effect was slightly impaired because my iPod bounced back to the home page for no reason, but it was nince.
Instagram...

You're not complaining. You can always try and relieve your stress here. And good luck on everything!

I hope the surgery works. Good luck!
Very optimistic of you. Everyone has a choice to have a next time. Stay strong, Soph.

I get what you mean. And no, I won't kill you.

This text is small and white/invisible because it's a
 

I really hope that it goes well.

hahahahaha no. it's more of a measure of how emotionally messed up and unstable and alsdkfjaslfdjasdlfjk I am. but it's definitely not in comparison to society.
*massive hugs* you shouldn't. ever.
watch TV, listen to music, read a book, anything that will get your mind off it.

AHHHH THE SURGERY WAS TODAY

It's still a fifty-fifty chance

AHHH

Today was surprisingly...
good?

I'm so sorry, Jesse!!! D: Just try not to worry too much. If it can't be cured, then it's better to just put your dog to sleep...it will be less painful for both of you. I know it's hard...I've lost my fair share of beloved pets... T_T

Just don't hold yourself back if you want to cry. That will only make you feel worse. And your dog wouldn't want you to feel worse.

Good! ^_^ Don't question it, just try to enjoy it.

Yes he is.
which means his insults are also stupid.
Which further means you are awesome.

*virtually punches him*
I had 'friends' like that. You are better off without them.
As LST said, 'his insults are also stupid, which further means you are awesome'.

I am so DONE.

*walks away*

D: What happened?

im fucking talented and you are not so please shut up about being superior to me

Nothing. I'm just done. I'm not upset. Just done.

I'm so worried. I don't know if I should be, but I am. So I made a really good friend as of entering high school and today my brother gave me a note from her saying that she was really glad that we'd became friends. It was a really nice note and all, but I'm just worried.... I happen to know that she does cut and from what she's said she doesn't have the best life ..... I'm just worried that . . ..you know, she'd commit suicide. I haven't been to school for the last couple of days due to being sick so I haven't been able to talk to her or see how she's doing what with family and friend life. I really don't know what to do. GAH. So freaking worried....

Call her and leave a voice message, or e-mail her. Either way, something random about how you want to make cookies with her or something, or how envious you are of whatever she's good at, or how much you're glad you're friends. Don't mention the suicide thing.

It would be a good idea if she weren't grounded. Her parents put a lock on her phone and she's not allowed on the internet >.< I hate how these things just don't work out. Stupid road blocks.....

ohhhhhhh dear god last night was BAD
my mom took away my music
i'm not allowed to listen to it anymore
and i seirously don't know why
like
what?
it's not a distraction
it helps me focus
ughhhhhhhh


as;ldghasd;g music is kind of the only thing i've been living off of i reallyreallyreally don't wnat to not listn to it i need it

YouTube, then?

I WISH I DIDN'T LIVE SO FAR AWAY CAUSE I'D SING TO YOU
but i do so i can't
D:

I love everything and hate everything at the same time.

Meep.

No no no no Pluzzle, PLEASE don't. You are a brilliant person and you are worth so much and please don't. It's all okay, you deserve to live, you just have to get through these rough patches. The good things that you've done on KP alone outweigh anything you could have done. And it wouldn't matter if you had actually done something truly terrible, because no-one has enough faults that they should stop existing rather than carrying on, and fixing things. You are completely amazing and epyk and screw them for being insensitive.

Too scared to do anything incase someone thinks it's wrong. Missing out on opportunities that probably won't come up again. Dammit. That's it.

And you'll make through many other nights. Be optimistic and eat chocolate.

I have a gigantic zit on my face.

CURSE YOU HORMONES.....

I'm not sure whether to laugh at my dad's very straight-forward screaming "I WILL NOT DISCUSS IT WITH YOU!" or to shove him out of the window.

Well, this is not a vent because I am feeling absolutely fine emotionally, but it's a kind of observation again, but this one could quite possibly be upsetting. I guess I'll put it in white in case anyone doesn't want to read it. I am so going to regret posting this. I don't mean to offend or disrespect anyone.

It kind of seems like society is trying to make us unhappy and misfortunate. There's this idea that richer, luckier, happier people are not as good people as the poor, unhappy and unlucky.
In primary school, my headteacher gave an assemblies about praying, and the Bible, and God. She told us a story about two men who were praying in the same church. One man was very fortunate. He was wealthy, and had a loving family, and he was thanking God for his kindness and generosity. The second man was an ex-criminal of some kind, and he was apologising to God, and praying for forgiveness and asking for a better life. Our headteacher told us that God favoured the second man over the first, despite telling us less than a week ago that God loved everyone equally. But I digress. She told us that God preferred him because he was unhappy, but still prayed.
People using guilt trips heavily imply that less fortunate people are better and more morally right. While this is often true, because of the emotional and physical strength and endurance needed to go through the suffering, they are not better people because they are less fortunate. People react to situations differently. There are people who would be amazing and strong through hard times, and there are people who would get angry and hateful and horrible if presented with the exact same situation. In the same way, lucky people can be positive and help others, or mock the less fortunate and abuse their supposed superiority.
When people die, especially in tragic circumstances such as random murders and suicide, everyone is suddenly praising them, and saying that they were wonderful, and the best. Even the kids who were bullied by everyone, and thought of as useless and stupid, thus forcing them into taking their own lives, are remembered by the very people who abused them as brilliant and whatnot. Why couldn't you have told them that when it could have saved them? Maybe because they feel guilty for being alive, maybe they feel sorry for the one who died, maybe they're showing respect to the dead, or maybe they do actually think that in dying, the deceased has risen above and beyond the living, that they are automatically better than everyone else. It's almost as if they think that dying in tragedy makes you a better person.
But it doesn't. You are still the same person as you were when you were alive. So to everyone reading this: You are wonderful, brilliant, intelligent, amazing, and so many other things, and you don't need to suffer for people to think that. No-one who is sentient is faultless. But no-one deserves suffering, and feeling sorry for them won't help them either.