i am a gay and i support u

thanks i support u too
no wonder this thread is named the GSRM (Gays Supporting Really gay Many other gays) Community

h E l P .

discurse if u wish

i feel like saying "if you're heteroromantic ace or aro heterosexual you're basically a straight get out of the lgbtq community!!" means you're discounting the "ace" and "aro" part which basically means you're invalidating the identity

I'm not heteroromantic ace nor aro heterosexual but as an aroace-spec this argument feels like it's invalidating the identity

then again there's a difference between "this identity isn't valid" and "this community isn't for this identity"

I tend to be inclusive rather than exclusive like aRE YOU IN ANY WAY NOT HETEROROMANTIC HETEROSEXUAL CISGENDER (ALL OF THE ABOVE)? YOURE IN!!!! but also I don't like the LGBT term bc to be "inclusive" you have to go LGBTQIA+ so if LGBT is a community within the GSRM community and het aces or aro hets fit into the GSRM community but not the LGBT community then that's fine.

just don't invalidate aromanticism and asexuality by saying that het aces are the same thing as The Straights TM. 1: this isn't the Oppression Olympics. 2: considering we live in a hypersexualized society with the expectation that a romantic AND sexual relationship is a) the only type of relationship and b) will always occur eventually, anyone on the aroace spectrum including het aces doesn't "fit in" and is called unnatural or diseased because they don't want to engage in romance and/or sex. Idk, to me saying "het aces aren't queer enough for the community" is like saying "white-passing biracials don't count as poc and aren't allowed to enjoy poc cultures". like white-passing girls wearing cheongsam because it's a part of their life and culture and then getting called out for appropriation. I'm not saying appropriation isn't a thing because it definitely is, but white-passing and/or "part white" isn't the same thing as white.

I'd love to hear others' opinions on the matter.

also allies trying to be part of the LGBT community like: I get that you're showing support, but allies shouldn't have to be a thing. being an ally of the LGBT community is called being a decent human being. If you're an ally you shouldn't get recognition, you're not a marginalized group you're the expectation.

the only opinions im gonna share are:
1) if u dont experience same gender attraction or youre not trans you shouldnt use the word queer. queer was a slur used against same gender couples and trans people.

2) i used to be a shitty aro and talk about how gross pda was in front of my gay friends who displayed pda and then orlando happened and then i shut up and apologized. gay romantic love and gay sexuality and displays of it will always be an act of defiance against homophobia.

My thinking is that since asexual people don't face institutionalized discrimination, they shouldn't be treated as a marginalized group. Also, as Elliot said, "queer" was meant to describe gay/bi/trans people, and there's no history of oppression against asexuals.

And since the LGBT movement is about the advancement of marginalized groups, and asexuals aren't marginalized, they can't possibly benefit from such a movement.

And as a side note, being aromantic does not make you part of the LGBT movement either. Being different doesn't mean you're discriminated.

Also I agree with what you said:
"there's a difference between 'this identity isn't valid' and 'this community isn't for this identity'"

im queer in that im nb and ive been in approximately 1 relationship, which was same-sex. (we both identified as girls when we entered the relationship, although I think both of us now identify as nb). I understand that queer is a reclaimed slur. I would, however, also like to know more about the word "queer" and its history. Time to do more research lol, after I actually do this math hw I'm supposed to be doing rn lamo.

i agree on 2. I mean. I'm probably a shitty ace. But I believe you're right. I'm not concerned with being "right", though.