I HATE DAYLIGHT SAVINGS.
I'm already falling asleep at my desk as is and know I get less sleep than before.
What the hell is the point of daylight savings except to screw with everyone?

I would help, but you know this isn't my area.

i'm sorry i know i shouldn't feel bad there's no reason for me to be upset i'm just stupid
it's fine you don't need to help me
my therapist is just...... whatever
i'm scared she's going to hate me if she digs too deep
but she'll hate me if i don't let her try to find what she thinks is my 'problem'
at this point why should i even care about the cause of my depression?
the fact is that i have it
and taking three pills a day isn't helping me not feel like shit
so let's ignore the cause
and try to find a better solution
which everyone thinks is hidden in the cause
well
fuck them
i know myself better than anyone
and i'm not letting myself let go of my self hate
it's the only thing that's keeping me sane

*whispers* yo if the anti-depressants aren't helping i think you're supposed to switch to a diff med?
*hugs u* well i'm never gonna hate you

if those anti depressants aren't helping revise them, switch or whatever, you need to tell your psychiatrist ( i assume a psychiatrist not a psychologist gives you the scripts idk that's what happens here ) that it's not working and yeah

<3

The thing about depression is that a lot of the time, it's caused by a chemical imbalance in your brain. NOT something that happened to you years ago, NOT something someone did to you, NOT something that's hidden in your life. It's a physical health problem that effects your mood and mindset.

Heather? If the meds you're taking aren't helping, you need to make your doctor give you something else. Even if it takes longer to get them to stop digging into your past and stuff, AT LEAST get them to write you a new prescription. That should be really easy.

Yeah I know with what we're capable of we'd probably make a bigger mess.
But hey thanks ^-^

so i told the school counselor. She attacked and blackmailed me with brain scanning and kept me in for a million sessions and made me tell her everything under pain of telling my parents, and then she told me that I was a shitty friend and being a bitch by burdening my friends with all my shit. And then she told me that my mind is screwed up.

And so then I told my mother who filed a complaint against her and idk it's better now but seriously I am sitll pissed off because i tell myself that stuff enough i don't need other people confirming my hypothesis that i am worthless

It's okay, I'm used to it
I'm virtually invisible? Fine, be that way, I'm used to it.
Listing everyone but me? It's fine, I'm used to it.
Having a little place where the rest of you hang out? You know, that one you never even thought to invite me to? Ha! It's fine, I'm used to it by now.
I'm so goddamn tired of being a bitch because I'm envious.
I'm goddamn envious, okay?
I feel like such a goddamn attention whore.
I have friends, don't I? So what's the goddamn problem?
I'm tired of caring about shit like this.
I'm tired of, on one hand, having bonds,
But on the other, not thinking they're good enough.
Why the fuck do I care if those two are better friends than them and I?
I'm such a goddamn controversial bitch, and I'm fucking tired of it.
I'm tired of referring to them as goddamn stupid bastards
When I'm actually fucking envious.
I'm an ungrateful bitch, okay?
And I feel like a fucking attention whore for even posting this.
I'm jealous. I hate to admit it, but I am.
I feel like your average goddamn teenage bitch right now.
You know, that one possessive bitch that gets jealous every time you make a new friend that she doesn't have.
What the hell am I jealous of, anyway?
And it's so hard to fucking admit it, because I'm so goddamn proud (and NOT in a good way) that I want to fucking cry.
I won't accept any help, because I have too much fucking pride.
The line between my hatred and my envy is blurred, and my pride denies everything.
I feel like I fade, day by day. The original me. My humanity.
I'm barely a fucking teenager and I don't feel like a child at all anymore,
But on the other hand, I feel that that's all this is. Me being childish.
I write this shit off as hormones.
I have no right to feel this way.
I'm such a fucking child.
I don't even understand myself.
So how should I know squat about the world?
I barely live in it.
What the hell is wrong with me?
I'm inconsiderate, I'm controversial, and I'm slowly going deeper.
What the hell, me?
This is stupid, anyway. It's not like my goddamn feelings matter.
I'm so fucking controversial.
I just keep rambling on about my worthless crap.
I don't even know how to end this shitty post.
I'm such a fucking moron.
I don't even know.