| HeatherB |
01-02-2013 02:44 PM |
Quote:
Originally Posted by BlueMi
(Post 397396)
Still wanna do the exercise thing with me? :D I did flying trapeze today, which is a work out haha. But we could write up like five things to do daily, and every couple days we can post a pic and tag each other to check in. :P
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I blogged a lot today! My fingers are sore now. xD
Quote:
Originally Posted by pluzzle
(Post 396751)
F**k it.
I'm deleting my tumblr, Instagram, and all the other accounts I have except for Skype, email and kidpub. I have realised that if I hate people, and people hate me, why not cut ties with the world? And this will sound very strange, but have you ever wondered about being selectively mute? I have. I'm going to try it. It won't last long - I can tell - i just want t get a reaction for once.
Oh, and I am no longer "romantically linked" to this max guy. Basically, he's just going to be my friend and I am going to point it out.
When I told him about deleting my accounts, he said why. I said what I said about people,and he said what's the point of what? It was the perfect time to tell him I'd thought about suicide recently,but I didn't. He then said "having accounts?" And I said 'a little bit.i was leaning to something else but I'll tell you a different time. He said for me to tell him. I told him something subtle.. He caught on pretty quick,
So now I'm writing this in my ipad with my iPod on my stomach waiting for him to reply to what I said (a joke, to lighten my mood. Didn't work). I doubt he will ever say a word to me again... But for some strange reason that's okay.
Because I don't know if I want him to, sometimes.
F**k the world.. I want to be alone. Can't you see that, everyone? Can't you stop tormenting me into further misery for a couple of minutes while I wipe the tears away?
Stop...
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I know what it's like to want to be alone. My parents could never, ever understand just WHY I'm so addicted to the computer and the Internet--it's the only place where I feel safe, and am allowed to be me. I've gone mute a few times, and it's actually kind of nice. You don't have to talk to anyone, you don't even have to be noticed... Sometimes, when I don't like being me, I'll pretend I'm five years old, and rediscovering the world again. I'll pretend I'm someone else entirely. That's why I like acting. You don't have to be yourself, and you don't even have to live in this f---ed up world. And writing, you can create your own worlds, where it's safe, and okay. So that's what I can advise you to do. Write, or even if you're not writing, just imagine the world you'd like to be in, the world you'd like to see. Imagine the corniest, most cliche things--it doesn't matter if they're unicorns pooping rainbows or a haven behind a waterfall, whatever makes you feel safe is okay. Make a little world of your own and give it a name, and anytime someone says or does something to you or the world gives you yet another burden to carry on your back, think of the name of your world. That's what I do sometimes, when things get really rough. Just make yourself a safe place in you and you can go there anytime you want. Stay strong, hon. :')
@LST: *hugs* |
