It would be after most of the people I know leave, or I feel like it's better if I leave.

But what if the tree is a bloodoak and wants to eat you as you hug it? D: Wait… that would add much excitement.
TIE-DYE BEATS POLKA DOT. :D

Psycho
 

There's a certain person online who, whenever I see them talking, it throws me into a pit of anger... it's not even anger, it's more psychotic. It passed about five minutes ago, but I burst out into a fast-paced humming of Blood by MCR. It was creepy, watching myself laughing and singing and rocking back and forth with my heart jumping around. :( Oh well.

Tye dye shirt and polka dot shorts. ^.^

Miserable
 

Sick sick sick sick sick. Can't move without a pounding headache.

Just... Upset...
I hate being the new girl at school. I'm always moving since my family's military, so it's been a new school every few years. Longest time in a school is homeschooling for about 3-5 years. DX I hate being new, I'M the one who says, "Hi, what's your name?" and "Cute coat! I love that color; BTW, I'm new here!". I'm tired of having to find a niche, or following someone around till I know my own way to class; new locker combos, new kids, everyone's lookin' at me like I'm some kinda intruder. I try to be friendly, I try to make friends, but it's so hard when they don't accept me. I've never really found a "bff" or boy friend. I've got no clique or group or whatever, just me and my dumb drawing and haikus... For once in my Life, I want someone ELSE to come up to me and say something nice. It's always me. I'm always the new girl. It never gets easier, never gets harder, only becomes more tedious. I'm rambling and ranting and I don't care. Not like a teardrop about being "new girl" really makes a difference, but it's a hard thing to keep doing... And, next year or two, I'll be playing New Girl again. I'm so tired of being happy and friendly to unaccpeting people, so I aim to be quiet and stay out of the way. Keep out of trouble and keep to my friends from church. They said they'd support me and I want to stick with them. I just wish I didn't have to be New Girl so often... >_<'

Confused, frustrated
 

Well, the thing's like that:
On Tuesday, I was asking Charmaine, my former school best friend about the routine we have to do in the skipping examination. And she said I was annoying. Then the whole day went on with her being cold and saying spiteful things. Yesterday there was this talk about bullying and she said that she could squeal on me for bullying when I elbowed her, which accidentally hit a nerve (literally) and made her arm vibrate for ages. Sometimes I'm mean to her and she doesn't really mind, but when i asked her about the examination she just went...weird. Today I asked her what's her problem and she said, "I think it's you with the problem. You always say 'Whatever' and 'I don't care' You don't care about the project (we were doing a computer project that time. We were in a same group before when we were friends so we were stuck together. And I do care!) and everything except for yourself!" WHICH IS SO NOT TRUE!
I still don't get what's it with her.

I've been working really hard to get into Show Choir, I've taken vocal lessons and taken previous WAAYYY TO EASY classes to prepare and then taken harder classes to get really good. Now all my friends are gonna audition WITHOUT any prior choir learning. I'm glad they want to so I have friends in the class but I'm a little annoyed that I've worked really hard and they just wanna come in and be good.

I was annoyed when I got told off for the following piece of dialogue between me and a teacher
Mrs S: Are you listening to me?
Me: Vaguely...

Apparently that was rude. No one ever told me.

This kid wrote on a goal sheet he will listen in class more.
Teacher: You don't listen during class??
Kid: No not really

This was at parents evening. Ok, I was bored. I was looking at displays on the wall and thinking about unrelated things, such as Sherlock Holmes.

I hardly pay attention in class (when i was in class) but, as a homeschooler, you have to read to yourself, so it falls on me if i don't pay attention to myself. Eh, it helps, I suppose... its hard to listen in class when one's mind is focusing on awesome new stories and poems to write, instead of algebraic equations of x^2+b*x+c

Tired
 

My dad... thinks he failed me because I don't believe in God, not the way he does. Thinks I'm lost in a cloud of ignorance. That atheists tend to be stupid.

Then HE's ignorant.

A friend of mine who's an atheist is so rude about religion behind my back! It's annoying, because I know he respects me, and he's less full-on in his rudeness too my face, but he wrote a lot of rude answers in response to some religious questions on some sheets everyone was working on, and I saw him googling 'why are christians so annoying?'. I've told myself this is his last chance, and if he does anything like that again, I'll ask him as politely as I can to stop it - or I'll quite possibly kill him :D

I don't know anymore...
 

I just don't know anymore... I'm not sure about anything anymore. I'm not sure if my writing is good, if my parents are just saying it is 'cause they're my family, I'm not sure if my friends are actually my friends considering I tend to be left out a lot... It's just, I don't know. Half the people I thought were my friends ended up abandoning me, and me being the anti-social and self-conscious person I am, am unable to find new friends since I'm constantly worrying about what they might think of me.
Never am I able to get away from my guilt. Guilt at what? At the mistakes I've made, at the judgments people must make when they see me. The errors, the mistakes, they must be thinking about how much of an idiot I am, how clumsy and messed up I am. It drives me crazy. And sometimes, randomly, when I'm not even /doing/ anything worth feeling guilty over, I have an overwhelming sense of guilt and just feel like I can't take it anymore and just don't want to live.
I just don't know...
I don't talk in school, I don't even post any of my stories on here 'cause I'm worried about what people will think.
Which means I can't open up to anyone without me thinking they're thinking 'bout how pathetic I am.
Yep, I'm pathetic, worthless, and all those other adjectives people usually use to describe incompetent people.
But that's the way I am, and there's no escaping from it.

Runes, you are greater than the machine. I know you are.

(The machine is the sense of self victimizing to the point where you feel like you can't get out. The machine seems to have a tight grip of you. Feeling bad all the time is not healthy, at all.)

Oh, and don't say I don't know you. Anyone who goes past the shallow dreams of fame and fortune to true art is a strong person in my eyes. If you want to get better at writing, write. Thats the only way. And even if your words suck, a true author would be strong enough to keep trying until your vision falls into place. Anyone could be a true author.

Before Friday, skating, playing my violin, going outside, ect. was always a way to make myself feel better about myself and just give me time to think.
Now everything hurts too much. I feel like my heart weighs a thousand pounds in my chest and doesn't want to go on.
But I've discovered that if I don't think about my life, it doesn't hurt.
Writing is legitly my whole life now.

To be honest, I'm not sure you can ask him to stop. I mean, he's not offending you directly, you said yourself that he's respectful to you... And really, atheists get a lot of crap from Christians.

I hate when my dad controls all my projects!! I know that me wants me to get in, but I want it to be my work! Not his! I'm doing a poster that explains why I should be in yearbook class next year. Apparently my ideas were unprofessional and my title that said My Submission for Yearbook 2012-2013 was redundant and tacky. Every time I said I didn't like my dad's idea to do bullet points in b&w he got louder and louder until finally I asked "anything else you'd like to add?" then we lost it and started yelling at each other.

Sad? Angry?
 

Well, my mom hates it when I write. She always tells me that I can write in my free time, but do you know when that it??? Ten o'clock! At night!! :mad:

I usually write at school, but she wants me to do extra geometry instead...

I'm just really, really mad.

Grrrr...

Bored, a little worried
 

Well, I'm bored because I've been on the computer since 4 in the morning and now it's six thirty in the morning... >_> I have no life. I want to go upstairs and get all my stuff ready for the day but I can't because everyone's still sleeping and the fuse is out. I also have this weird urge to do something but I don't know what, and I wish there was someone here to talk to or something because this is so boring. >_> Really lonely.
I'm also kind of worried... I rarely have sleep issues, but last night I could barely fall asleep, and even then I woke up every forty minutes until I got sick of it and got up at four. -_-' I think I should stay away from eating red meat or something because I sleep like crap whenever I eat that.
Huh. Well. I'm bored.

My English teacher hates my guts. She says I have "no social skills" and that I'm "rude". Sure, I'm probably an Aspie, but that's not for her to say. Anyone wanna offer some sympathy? :(

Oh dear. I am not the sympathic person at all.

Have you told anyone about this? Like your parents/carer...? Well, apart from us kidpubbers of course. :D

Yeees... if you tell it to a principal or the teacher's superior you could get her fired... (*trollface*)

I considered calling a teacher out for student privacy violation. She blurted out what only the guidance counsellor should know, TWICE, and I was so eager to just raise my hand and be like, "Isn't that student privacy violation?" That teacher's seriously insane... She takes every opportunity she can to yell at me/us. :^I

Heh. I have so much to vent -_- i dunno how to start.
Lets see here, after that stupid mistake with the guy I liked, and then that one incident where everyone thought I was missing and called the police. And then there's some friend issues and a busy life and family issues, not to mention all those high expectations that I have to live up too -_-

Nice, called the police... xP

1: Jealous. 2: Angry.
 

You might want to not read this: im on a rant!

1: Jealous
Why is it my sister that everyone loves? She's got the pretty doll looks, the innocent laugh, the musical ear *grumble* while i have the spots and the annoying laugh, and an OK musical ear... plus she's 4 years younger than me! Everyone always says 'oh welll done Floriane, your test was really good!' or 'oh how pretty you look today!' while if i try to impress, its just 'yes thats nice *moves on*'. Plus what really irritates me is that when no one else is around, she 'accidently' trips and grabs onto me, therefore 'accidently' scarring me with her extra long nails and punching and kicking me, then pinching herself slightly and going 'Mum!!!! Garance hurt me!!!!' then i get into loads of trouble!!!!!

2: Angry
At school, someone whose name i wont mention in case she reads this, is supposed to be my best friend. yet she always says im a posh snob whose spoilt, even though i do almost no after school activities, my parents are paying tons of money to get their messy divorce over, and we're going to have to move into a tiny flat! she says im wierd and a freak, which im used to, but what really gets me is that she always says im spoilt. quick reality check: who goes swimming for 3 hours every single day? who lives in a giant flat with a studio and garden? who goes to swimming galas every weekend? who goes on big expensive holidays? um, HER! and she has he cheek to call me spoilt, a posh snob because i dont speak full street lingo and speak with correct grammar, and a freak because i go on kidpub all the time! then she goes all puppy eyes the next day, saying shes sooooo sorry and will never do it again, and it's in my nature to forgive everyone (with the exception of my sister), and the wheel turns; nothing is ever new (Sherlockians, hope you reconize that phrase from a scandal in belgravia...)!

Grrrrrrrr.....

You're not jealous. You should be frustrated at your sister. Just spill it out to your mum and say all the stuff. Maybe she won't believe you though...then maybe you can say that they just love your sister too much to believe you. No, that's too spoilt-child.
And the next time your friend says that you're all spoilt you just cut her short and say, "Yeah, yeah, I know, can't you change the record?!"

Everyone thinks my sister is an angel, even my mum! No point for me trying to tell her - I've done so tons of times!

Oh, guess what? I'm friends with my friend again... she did her cute puupy eyes that I can't resist... WHY?!?!?!?! I NEED IMMUNITY AGAINST PUPPY DOG EYES!

Anger, despair, utter confusion
 

Oh my god... >_< I spent like the last five minutes crying... honestly, I never cry, but honestly, stomachaches and headaches get me every time...
Well, here's the dill: I can't eat anymore. I don't know how this came about, but I know that it's infuriating, exhausting to try and figure out, and depressing because I can't eat. ANYTHING. So I have to deal with hunger pangs all through the school day and then go home and PRAY, as I pick at my lunch (soon to be my supper... maybe even the only meal I get in one day) that I won't get sick.
I feel so bad right now... like my whole diaphragm is going to explode, like it's jam-packed with hot lint (I know, weird) or something... it hurts so much, and if I go to sleep like this, it will be about a thousand times worse in the morning. (I have an allergy to salmon *my favourite food, too... TT_TT* and this is basically what usually happens if I eat salmon, only salmon... so I don't know what's going on.)
It's so frustrating, and it's confusing because this has never happened before, me not being able to eat anything... Every day I screw something up, trying to figure out my stomach, and I go to bed wanting to throw up and I wake up wanting to throw up, and I have to try AGAIN.
But tomorrow, I swear, I'll get it.
A couple spoonfuls of cold cereal... only about half the bowl... bean sprouts and a carrot for lunch at school... and then half of a sandwich when I get home. Then no more.
Ughhh... -_________________- This sucks... this sucks so bad...

(*a couple minutes later*)


THIS STILL SUCKS, GUYS.

(*needs to vent*)

It's Still Sucking Really Bad~~!!!!!!!

>______< Arhahgghrjghsad!!!

Why on earth?!?

Sandy, that sounds HORRIBLE. D: I'm so sorry. I hope you figure this out...

I was at camp and that happened to me... weird, weird urge to do something...

Try going outside in the freezing air and doing cartwheels. xD That's what helped me...

Nothing... O_o
 

Ever have that feeling where you want to feel something but you just feel well... nothing? Yeah I know, kinda weird...
Also as I'm a teenager my emotions can be all over the place lately. (Hormones)

I know what you mean. Don't ask. It's hard to explain.

When I feel extremely sad, I feel like there's an acid eating away in my stomach. I can't get to it, or claw it out, so it usually results in me banging my head on the wall, slapping myself repeatedly, and other.. stuff.

excited
 

this thread needs some happiness!

anyway. I'm SUPER stoked! I'm 16 yrs old, but I'm probably going to be doing college next year XD nursing school! and I'm starting drivers Ed really soon too, and likely getting braces :D

So...just wanted to say to everybody: I went through a really hard time in my life as well... it's a bit personal, but along with that I was going through some BAD self-esteem issues. I cried all the time, and I had a really hard time enjoying things. I didn't think I was pretty, or that anyone loved me. (middle child issues ;P) So, I just wanted to remind you that things WILL look up. I see myself now and I know I love myself. I don't know any of you personally but I DO know for a fact that you are all AMAZING. It's not a crime to love yourself, okay?

~Bambi!