The Writer's Block

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-   -   Your emotional venting thread. I'll explain. (http://www.kidpub.com/forum3/showthread.php?t=2095)

maxi 01-22-2013 04:09 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by TheAshWolf (Post 412689)
Warning: This is long. Also a bit obvious. Just needed to speak the unspoken, y'know?




Thanks, Tredom. <:^) I know.

It's just....goodness gracious, everyone. x__x (I'm not trying to single out anyone or anything, and I hope what I'm about to say doesn't offend anyone, because that's the absolute LAST thing I'd want to do. O_O)

When exactly did this thread turn into the Let's Cuss About Our Parents and Talk About How Much We Hate Them thread? When did this also turn into the Let's Write in Tiny White Type thread?

I understand why people feel better typing in font that's harder to read, since it's more like talking softly or being discreet. I understand why everyone's so angry--everyone gets mad at their parents from time to time, some more often than others.

But sometimes, you have to stand back and realize what's going on.

Parents are still people. They're imperfect, just like us. As cliche as it sounds, children are not born with manuals. All those How To Raise a Child books are merely opinions written by imperfect people that aren't much different than the parents reading them. Also, parents were kids once. Some have gone through a lot of hardship in their life. That can make people bitter. That can make raising a child differently from how they were raised difficult. And then there are others who haven't gone through many hardships that still get on their children's nerves and make them feel badly. Parents are still people. People are prone to depression, anxiety, anger issues, aggressive tenancies, addictions (including drugs, and yes, alcohol is a drug) and can sometimes just be plain old stubborn. Not to mention life is getting harder with the economies crashing--parents have to work longer and harder to get less money than they did before. Some parents don't have jobs because there simply aren't any available. That puts a lot of stress on people.

And then you have to remember the biggest thing in all this--no matter what, your parents are your parents. You're not going to get another biological mother and father. If you're adopted, or one of your parents aren't biologically related to you, the same still applies. They are your parents. No one can replace them, even if you think someone can. You should love them for just being your parents, regardless of what they do. Everyone on Earth eventually becomes an orphan. Parents grow old. Parents die. Things are left unspoken, grudges are kept until the bitter end. But when the person is dead and gone, you realize how much time you've wasted. You know why?

Deep down, even the most bitter of people with all the problems in the world still love their children. When they pressure you about school and the future, they're not trying to scare you or make things tougher or stress you out. They're concerned about your future. They want you to have a secure life, a good job, and sometimes they get a little irritable when you don't see things their way. Practicality outweighs dreams, sometimes, in their minds. It's not because they see your dreams as stupid, even though they may say that. They had dreams once. They were kids once. More than likely, their dreams might have died the hard way: reality crept on them slowly, or they found themselves in the middle of the cold, harsh real world without a moment to put away their desires safely. They may just be trying to bring you down to earth in the least painless way possible--by telling you it's not practical. (Key word: least. Not totally painless, least.) Or, heck, maybe they just don't know any other way to do it than to be a little blunt about it. I don't know. I'm not them. My point is, parents RARELY actually want to make their child's life a living nightmare. Unless they're psychopaths or sadists or selfish or something, at the end of the day, they just want what's best for their children. Love can seem tough sometimes. But it's still love, even if it's wrong or seems harsh. Truth is, age does tend to bring wisdom. Is it possible for parents to be wrong? Yes. But is it a crazy idea that they might be right? No. Most often, they ARE right. You just need to trust them, sometimes, even if you don't fully understand.

And you know what helps? As corny as it sounds, talking helps. Tell them how you feel. Avoid placing the blame on them, though, like saying, "You always make me feel ___," or "Every time I ____, you ___, which is mean and unfair to me." No one wants to hear that they're hurting someone they love. That makes people feel guilty, and guilt can turn into misguided anger. They can feel like they're being critiqued. That can make the situation worse. You need to tell them how you feel about the situation. You need to ask them to not do certain things. You need to tell them that you don't understand, but you want to understand.

And, you know what? Every now and again, you really just have to put yourself in their shoes. Honestly take a look at things through their eyes. And if you still don't understand...maybe you just don't have all the facts. Parents sometimes keep things from their children because they don't feel the need to worry them. Maybe there's some issue in the family you're not aware of. Maybe the parent is having a hard time at work. (Jerks are everywhere, not just in school. Contrary to what you might think, most of those jerks don't grow up, they just turn into adults. They go on to get jobs and pick on other people just like they did in school.)

And you know what else? Sometimes, you just have to admit to yourself that you don't understand, and you might not ever understand. There are things you just have to learn to live with. <:^/ Life isn't fair, but don't let that get to you. Picture this: You're on a walk. The wind is blowing relentlessly hard, tangling up your hair. Leaves and other junk hit you in the face as you go along. It's freezing; the wind chill factor is up. Do you yell at the wind for blowing so hard, hate the leaves for getting in your face, curse at the air for being so cold? You could either be upset about the whole thing, go on struggling, being angry, and freezing....or, you could do something about it. You go back inside, get a sweater, maybe tie your hair back, go back outside, and try to walk with the wind instead of against it. It's still cold, stuff is still hitting you in the face, but you're a bit warmer with the sweater, and it's much easier to walk with the wind. And, to top it all off, maybe you decide to make the best of it and fly a kite. (So what if the string breaks and the kite flies away? It was only 99 cents...haha.) In reality, accepting the situation you're in, trying to learn to work with it, and preparing yourself for letdowns and fights to come along now and again is so much healthier than always feeling bad for yourself and fighting to change things that just won't.



In conclusion:
"Might as well share, might as well smile; life goes on for a little bitty while." -Alan Jackson
It's okay to feel depressed about things. It's okay to wish it were different. Just don't let all that depression and wishing prevent you from living your life and having a relationship with your parents.
It's one thing if you post about being angry with your parents every now and again. But if that's all you post about...then...you might want to take a step back and think for a little while. <:^/ It's not good to be angry all the time. Stress is physically damaging to your body.

I'm tired of everybody on here wandering around, all angry and depressed about their relationships, and not seeming to have any solutions. Sometimes the best solution is to accept that there is no total solution. Sometimes, there are partial solutions, and what's left over just needs to be lived with. But, see, I know that sounds hard. Maybe even impossible. But...that's not impossible. It's perfectly possible to live with something you don't like. It's possible to be happy even if things aren't perfect.

Ash... (I feel ridicilous (sp?)) saying this but...
you are a BEAUTFIUL person... <:^)

maxi 01-22-2013 04:53 AM

I seriously want to post a rant/ramble relevant to writing but I am not sure. <:^/

TheAshWolf 01-22-2013 04:55 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by maxi (Post 412691)
Ash... (I feel ridicilous (sp?)) saying this but...
you are a BEAUTFIUL person... <:^)

O_o No I'm not. What in the world makes you think that? XD

But, seriously, now, I'm not. ._.

TheAshWolf 01-22-2013 04:56 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by maxi (Post 412717)
I seriously want to post a rant/ramble relevant to writing but I am not sure. <:^/

Go ahead! ^_^ If I can, you should be able to, also. XD

x_x *sincerely hopes I didn't offend/irritate anyone with my ramble*

maxi 01-22-2013 04:58 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by TheAshWolf (Post 412718)
O_o No I'm not. What in the world makes you think that? XD

But, seriously, now, I'm not. ._.

Ash. Seriously. Stahp it. You're amazing. Don't just go "AAAWWW thank you. X3" but accept it because I know everyone is not perfect but you are just a beautiful person, helping everyone with who needs who and what needs what. Just. Please. You are an amazing person. I think almost everyone on KidPub.com would agree with me. *le huggles* We all love you so much SO VERY MUCH. You are amazing, okay? Don't say you aren't because it is true. Now think for a moment of all the amazing things you have left me. You're...truly inspirational.

Sorry. I had to let that out. >w<

maxi 01-22-2013 04:59 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by TheAshWolf (Post 412719)
Go ahead! ^_^ If I can, you should be able to, also. XD

x_x *sincerely hopes I didn't offend/irritate anyone with my ramble*

Thanks. I may be off writing it but replying to stuff on here too. ^_^

o.e *what? NO.*

maxi 01-22-2013 05:21 AM

Just Like a Editing Ramble Thing of a Boy Who Should Get Away. XD
 
WRITING HAS got something to do with reality that most things usually donít--love is that one certain thing that most people donít take into consideration as they rush their masterpieces (or rushed writings, trying to get a long rambling chapter out). They think it is not used for any circumstance at all in English, Maths or just practically anything in writing. But really... love is what we all need and sometimes we just need to take a step back and take a little look at this giant mess that we have created. Writing is not a thing you rush--writing is not a thing that you just finish and share--and sometimes people just need to edit because that is the best part yet boringest of writing. <:^/ I donít like how sometimes people on KidPub (and just plain anywhere from Figment to NaNoWriMo) donít edit and itís just not a good thing to me as I hate it when they donít edit and make their book look... not good.

I thought people these days wanted to make their writing look good and not scrappy like you just got it out of that trash can over there. I thought people loved to write but still loved to edit--well, to me, this is the case in writing. YOU NEED CC. And sometimes people just donít agree with that and just love it their way when--hey, thatís fine if they donít wanna be good at writing.

To me, I donít really enjoy my writing, to be honest. Donít say it is amazing or anything. Be honest. Take a single and individual moment to take a look at my writing--I despise. No descriptions, every ramble, everything is just talking dialogue blah blah blah and it really does pick me off. And people just think it is ďFREAKING AMAZING! ^_^Ē or ďSUPER AWESOME!Ē and they donít even get to think these questions: Why do you think it was good? Can you please tell me some improvements that couldíve been made and if so, go into detail about them. I love detailed comments on why people liked them, why they didnít, what can be improved on and I just really adore constructive criticism. I want more of it but people just think that isnít true--they just want more of the plot and not more of the ďgoodĒ writing.

So, if you really want to be a good writer, for goodness sake, please edit. I donít like seeing 3 paragraphs or a few sentences for a prologue or a chapter because itís not good enough and please just really really donít rush your writing and make sure that you are satisfied with your work--one day, you could be walking down the streets, all older around the age of 30 and you will think to yourself: ďWhy was my writing so bad then? I must write better.Ē Itís an amazing thing to take a look at your writing and pick the great things and the terrible things. Sometimes, I have to be honest, the stuff on here isnít that good--sorry if that upset you but some stuff are amazing and some are just clichť and bad and need work. So edit.

I do believe in all of you.

You can be amazing.

Now edit.

Please.

Just edit.

bookworm1999 01-22-2013 05:46 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by TheAshWolf (Post 412689)
Warning: This is long. Also a bit obvious. Just needed to speak the unspoken, y'know?




Thanks, Tredom. <:^) I know.

It's just....goodness gracious, everyone. x__x (I'm not trying to single out anyone or anything, and I hope what I'm about to say doesn't offend anyone, because that's the absolute LAST thing I'd want to do. O_O)

When exactly did this thread turn into the Let's Cuss About Our Parents and Talk About How Much We Hate Them thread? When did this also turn into the Let's Write in Tiny White Type thread?

I understand why people feel better typing in font that's harder to read, since it's more like talking softly or being discreet. I understand why everyone's so angry--everyone gets mad at their parents from time to time, some more often than others.

But sometimes, you have to stand back and realize what's going on.

Parents are still people. They're imperfect, just like us. As cliche as it sounds, children are not born with manuals. All those How To Raise a Child books are merely opinions written by imperfect people that aren't much different than the parents reading them. Also, parents were kids once. Some have gone through a lot of hardship in their life. That can make people bitter. That can make raising a child differently from how they were raised difficult. And then there are others who haven't gone through many hardships that still get on their children's nerves and make them feel badly. Parents are still people. People are prone to depression, anxiety, anger issues, aggressive tenancies, addictions (including drugs, and yes, alcohol is a drug) and can sometimes just be plain old stubborn. Not to mention life is getting harder with the economies crashing--parents have to work longer and harder to get less money than they did before. Some parents don't have jobs because there simply aren't any available. That puts a lot of stress on people.

And then you have to remember the biggest thing in all this--no matter what, your parents are your parents. You're not going to get another biological mother and father. If you're adopted, or one of your parents aren't biologically related to you, the same still applies. They are your parents. No one can replace them, even if you think someone can. You should love them for just being your parents, regardless of what they do. Everyone on Earth eventually becomes an orphan. Parents grow old. Parents die. Things are left unspoken, grudges are kept until the bitter end. But when the person is dead and gone, you realize how much time you've wasted. You know why?

Deep down, even the most bitter of people with all the problems in the world still love their children. When they pressure you about school and the future, they're not trying to scare you or make things tougher or stress you out. They're concerned about your future. They want you to have a secure life, a good job, and sometimes they get a little irritable when you don't see things their way. Practicality outweighs dreams, sometimes, in their minds. It's not because they see your dreams as stupid, even though they may say that. They had dreams once. They were kids once. More than likely, their dreams might have died the hard way: reality crept on them slowly, or they found themselves in the middle of the cold, harsh real world without a moment to put away their desires safely. They may just be trying to bring you down to earth in the least painless way possible--by telling you it's not practical. (Key word: least. Not totally painless, least.) Or, heck, maybe they just don't know any other way to do it than to be a little blunt about it. I don't know. I'm not them. My point is, parents RARELY actually want to make their child's life a living nightmare. Unless they're psychopaths or sadists or selfish or something, at the end of the day, they just want what's best for their children. Love can seem tough sometimes. But it's still love, even if it's wrong or seems harsh. Truth is, age does tend to bring wisdom. Is it possible for parents to be wrong? Yes. But is it a crazy idea that they might be right? No. Most often, they ARE right. You just need to trust them, sometimes, even if you don't fully understand.

And you know what helps? As corny as it sounds, talking helps. Tell them how you feel. Avoid placing the blame on them, though, like saying, "You always make me feel ___," or "Every time I ____, you ___, which is mean and unfair to me." No one wants to hear that they're hurting someone they love. That makes people feel guilty, and guilt can turn into misguided anger. They can feel like they're being critiqued. That can make the situation worse. You need to tell them how you feel about the situation. You need to ask them to not do certain things. You need to tell them that you don't understand, but you want to understand.

And, you know what? Every now and again, you really just have to put yourself in their shoes. Honestly take a look at things through their eyes. And if you still don't understand...maybe you just don't have all the facts. Parents sometimes keep things from their children because they don't feel the need to worry them. Maybe there's some issue in the family you're not aware of. Maybe the parent is having a hard time at work. (Jerks are everywhere, not just in school. Contrary to what you might think, most of those jerks don't grow up, they just turn into adults. They go on to get jobs and pick on other people just like they did in school.)

And you know what else? Sometimes, you just have to admit to yourself that you don't understand, and you might not ever understand. There are things you just have to learn to live with. <:^/ Life isn't fair, but don't let that get to you. Picture this: You're on a walk. The wind is blowing relentlessly hard, tangling up your hair. Leaves and other junk hit you in the face as you go along. It's freezing; the wind chill factor is up. Do you yell at the wind for blowing so hard, hate the leaves for getting in your face, curse at the air for being so cold? You could either be upset about the whole thing, go on struggling, being angry, and freezing....or, you could do something about it. You go back inside, get a sweater, maybe tie your hair back, go back outside, and try to walk with the wind instead of against it. It's still cold, stuff is still hitting you in the face, but you're a bit warmer with the sweater, and it's much easier to walk with the wind. And, to top it all off, maybe you decide to make the best of it and fly a kite. (So what if the string breaks and the kite flies away? It was only 99 cents...haha.) In reality, accepting the situation you're in, trying to learn to work with it, and preparing yourself for letdowns and fights to come along now and again is so much healthier than always feeling bad for yourself and fighting to change things that just won't.



In conclusion:
"Might as well share, might as well smile; life goes on for a little bitty while." -Alan Jackson
It's okay to feel depressed about things. It's okay to wish it were different. Just don't let all that depression and wishing prevent you from living your life and having a relationship with your parents.
It's one thing if you post about being angry with your parents every now and again. But if that's all you post about...then...you might want to take a step back and think for a little while. <:^/ It's not good to be angry all the time. Stress is physically damaging to your body.

I'm tired of everybody on here wandering around, all angry and depressed about their relationships, and not seeming to have any solutions. Sometimes the best solution is to accept that there is no total solution. Sometimes, there are partial solutions, and what's left over just needs to be lived with. But, see, I know that sounds hard. Maybe even impossible. But...that's not impossible. It's perfectly possible to live with something you don't like. It's possible to be happy even if things aren't perfect.

Oh my gosh, thank you XD You saved me and a lot of people. I'm ashamed to say I anever had the guts to explain this *pokes your huge post* Shame on me. Ash you are really amazing XD

bookworm1999 01-22-2013 05:48 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by maxi (Post 412723)
WRITING HAS got something to do with reality that most things usually donít--love is that one certain thing that most people donít take into consideration as they rush their masterpieces (or rushed writings, trying to get a long rambling chapter out). They think it is not used for any circumstance at all in English, Maths or just practically anything in writing. But really... love is what we all need and sometimes we just need to take a step back and take a little look at this giant mess that we have created. Writing is not a thing you rush--writing is not a thing that you just finish and share--and sometimes people just need to edit because that is the best part yet boringest of writing. <:^/ I donít like how sometimes people on KidPub (and just plain anywhere from Figment to NaNoWriMo) donít edit and itís just not a good thing to me as I hate it when they donít edit and make their book look... not good.

I thought people these days wanted to make their writing look good and not scrappy like you just got it out of that trash can over there. I thought people loved to write but still loved to edit--well, to me, this is the case in writing. YOU NEED CC. And sometimes people just donít agree with that and just love it their way when--hey, thatís fine if they donít wanna be good at writing.

To me, I donít really enjoy my writing, to be honest. Donít say it is amazing or anything. Be honest. Take a single and individual moment to take a look at my writing--I despise. No descriptions, every ramble, everything is just talking dialogue blah blah blah and it really does pick me off. And people just think it is ďFREAKING AMAZING! ^_^Ē or ďSUPER AWESOME!Ē and they donít even get to think these questions: Why do you think it was good? Can you please tell me some improvements that couldíve been made and if so, go into detail about them. I love detailed comments on why people liked them, why they didnít, what can be improved on and I just really adore constructive criticism. I want more of it but people just think that isnít true--they just want more of the plot and not more of the ďgoodĒ writing.

So, if you really want to be a good writer, for goodness sake, please edit. I donít like seeing 3 paragraphs or a few sentences for a prologue or a chapter because itís not good enough and please just really really donít rush your writing and make sure that you are satisfied with your work--one day, you could be walking down the streets, all older around the age of 30 and you will think to yourself: ďWhy was my writing so bad then? I must write better.Ē Itís an amazing thing to take a look at your writing and pick the great things and the terrible things. Sometimes, I have to be honest, the stuff on here isnít that good--sorry if that upset you but some stuff are amazing and some are just clichť and bad and need work. So edit.

I do believe in all of you.

You can be amazing.

Now edit.

Please.

Just edit.

Haha, this made me smile XD

maxi 01-22-2013 05:55 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by bookworm1999 (Post 412729)
Haha, this made me smile XD

I am glad--


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