i'm one of those people who drives myself to suicide by working and you know what? i deserve it. i need to work harder. it's never enough.

I mean I definitely need to start working harder...I hardly put any effort behind anything. Even my crippling fear of becoming nothing and being a disappointment isn't enough to motivate me. Personally I think I'd be better off putting self-care after being harder on myself.

tru, i need to work so much harder than i do really, self care isn't even part of it atm, i've just developed so many bad work habits and my priorities are all screwed to hell.

ugh

why do i have to make comments that sound pervy because i think i'm funny but everyone thinks that

a) i'm a weird perv

b) i'm a weird pervy lesbian (and don't get me wrong the last thing isn't bad but as i might actually be bi i just don't want to like be a PERVY girl who likes girls, yaknow? like....)

sidenote: how do you do that? like be bi/lesbian and then do the normal girl things like change in front of each other or whatever without everyone thinking i'm evil?

godsimsuchabitchandabadpersonandidiservetobehungin mymothersplace

Listen you are NOT a bad person. nothing that happened to your mom is your fault and I know that from listening to you. you deserve to live a long happy life, and you hanging yourself will not fix anything I can promise you that. In fact it would most likely make more people feel awful and scared and sad and I know you don't want that. Please, so many people care about you so much and you do not deserve to die.

hey not exactly sure how to help a ton with this because I'm super unsure with sexuality and stuff myself. but at my school there are a lot (like a lot a lot) of gay/bi girls. and from what I know they just don't worry about it much and change and all that the same as the straight girls. a lot of them had problems with that for a bit but most of them are perfectly comfortable now, and it also helps that a lot of people here are super body positive. but like really as long as you are respectful and don't mean anything bad or try to make anyone uncomfortable you should be fine!! and if you slip up it's ok, apologize to them and make sure that they know you're not trying to make advances and if they're a good person you'll be fine :)

question: when should one realize they need to see a therapist?

as a ""weird lesbian"" myself, i honestly don't care at all about changing in front of other girls.... probably bc i'm not out of the closet yet so no one really knows/cares and i'm not really creepy about it (like i don't just stand around watching people change or try to get them to take off more clothes than necessary)

like idk why there's this stereotype that we can't handle ourselves around other girls in those settings, tbh i literally do not care even if there's a girl i'm attracted to (i still politely look away bc privacy is a good thing to have)

thx both of you a lot 'cause like my school is tiny and no one is openly not cis or straight and like everyone would be cool with it but like i don't think anyone actually knows an lgbtq very well so it's just weird. bleh anyway thanks