Then you've got to think it's a change for the good.

Just wrote a 3 page letter about Dance. I'm thinking about giving it to them tonight to read....I'm nervous. Last time I gave them a letter, it didn't work and I ended up sobbing into my pillow for three hours....

Go for it. If they still refuse, try a compromise. For example, you could say that if they let you dance, then you'll try and get the best grades that you can.

Things you aren't:
annoying
a piece of shit
not good enough
stupid
idiotic
a bitch

Things you are:
an awesome writer
a great friend
f***ing amazing

The promise helped, didn't it? If it did at all, then it was worth it, I think.

I second everything that Isaac said. You are amazing and awesome, and not even a million stories can change that. You're a human being, you are allowed to make mistakes and break promises, and it doesn't make you any less amazing.

something has changed within me
something is not the same
i'm through with playing by the rules of someone else's game


yes, yes I am. I can handle my own life.

too long i've been afraid of losing love i guess i've lost
well if that's love
it comes at much too high a cost!

Thank you very much, I think I know what I want. Go get your own life. I like mine, and I'm sure as hell not selling.

so if i'm flying solo
at least i'm flying free
to those who'd ground me
take a message back from me

I'm defying gravity.

Is it weird that while "normal" people might fantasize about things that make them happy, I fantasize about me getting hurt—about hurting myself? About everything that'd ever scarred me as a child, everything that gave me nightmares and made me cry to myself just thinking about it happening to someone else?
Is it normal that I think about that every day, and that it's what makes me happy?
I just...
Does anyone else do this?
Is this why I feel odd?

I am annoying, I can just tell by the way Litzy looks at me and the way she speaks to me and everyone else thinks I'm annoying too, I can't blame them. I'm not smart in science or math at all or French and I struggle in English class to write a freaking paragraph. I even struggle to write something original thats not related to school. It's my fault when my friendships never turn out right. It's not their fault they have to be near someone who just drags them down. They never knew they'd have to put up with a clingy, suicidal pessimist. I don't know how you guys can think I'm amazing or awesome because if you knew me in real life, I'd probably be the last person you'd want to be around.

I don't even know if Litzy wants to be my friend anymore. We rarely ever talk in class, and it's hard to have a conversation with her, I have to actually try to have a conversation with her. I have to try hard. Because every time I don't try to make my words and sentences just right, it always ends up with her sounding annoyed or angry.
I don't even know if I want friends anymore. I just want to shut out the world.