The Writer's Block - Your emotional venting thread. I'll explain.

The Writer's Block (http://www.kidpub.com/forum3/index.php)

- Free advice (http://www.kidpub.com/forum3/forumdisplay.php?f=8)

- - Your emotional venting thread. I'll explain. (http://www.kidpub.com/forum3/showthread.php?t=2095)

Quote:

Originally Posted by maxi (Post 590061)

Instagram pm me i'm a dude i'll understand lmao

okok...see you there

Quote:

Originally Posted by Garrett (Post 590059)

im also guessing that kidpub is not a place where i can speak of pubic hair issues?

LMAO gl dude

Quote:

Originally Posted by meerkat (Post 590063)

on a happier note i had one of those dreams that was so nice i want to go to sleep to finish it up
(it was Very Gay)

that is good and nice and i am happy for u.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Garrett (Post 590059)

im also guessing that kidpub is not a place where i can speak of pubic hair issues?

flashback to when "the guy's thread" got taken over by girls talking about their periods
Yeah no. No it's not. :p

Quote:

Originally Posted by Garrett (Post 590055)

im super self-conscious about my body because im rly skinny and most of the time girls aren't super into really skinny dudes so :') not much I can do about it. I try to eat a lot and do all that gaining weight stuff with the protein but nothing happens. I'm literally 15 and I'm 6ft and I weight 114 pounds.
gah.
why. I have a little bit of muscle on my arms cause I work out. I literally have no fat on my body and I know a lot of people would do anything for that, but it's awful because that's what people see first when they look at me.
that's why I enjoy wearing long sleeve shirts and jeans. BEcause at least I think that they make my skinniness less noticeable.

You're not even that skinny. I weight less than you (though I'm shorter) but I'm also 15 and honestly? No one should be expecting a 15-year-old boy to have abs and a v-cut. Trust me, you're absolutely normal.

So some really crazy emotional stuff happened at school and it's all really weird and idk how to feel or what to do

Quote:

Originally Posted by Garrett (Post 590055)

Don't worry too much about it, bro, we all have those things we're self-conscious about. You'll grow into your body, just give it time :).

Quote:

Originally Posted by Zelda (Post 590074)

Don't worry too much about it, bro, we all have those things we're self-conscious about. You'll grow into your body, just give it time :).

yeah but i've always been taller than all my peers and skinny so it's nothing new.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Frostblaze (Post 590039)

oh, don't cringe - honestly, i was so much worse than you >< kid, i could tell you stories that would make you feel pretty dern good about your noob days, trust me... ah, lemme rephrase that - i've seen you come across all your obsessions, and it's been sososo great to see you get so pASSIONATE about them all, honestly - think of all the things you haven't been obsessed with yet ouo

hey, it's okay. we're all like that, but everyone's is different. i'm usually the happiest, funniest, dorkiest person who loves to make people laugh at my expense and talk about bands - and some kids actually like me, and that always surprises me. the person that absolutely falls in love with everyone who genuinely wants to talk to me, and not through my parents, and not as if they have to. but i think on the inside i'm reliving my worst moments, that time i absolutely crushed this one person, the time i had my worst social encounter. the time i humiliated myself because i could not get my damned anxiety attack under control. some days i literally would rather die than go see my friends and socialize. sometimes i wonder how i would hide cuts just so i could do it or fake a suicide - meaning, kill myself, but make it look like something else happened. i question my faith, damn myself for being a christian. but these sides are valid. they don't make me any realer or faker. that's something I control. and that's all they are: sides. they make up you. and maybe someday these sides will tweak a little.

so you're not alone, stormy

ahh Madie. You have no idea. you have no idea how happy you make me feel. no mater what you say you always make me feel better. I love you so much. I might even be dead already without you.

I'm scared. I'm scared at how much twenty one pilots has become a crutch for me. this morning I almost had a fricking panic attack because my dad said that I couldn't have my phone, therefor I couldn't listen to top.

I wIsH i DiDnt hAVe pRoBLemS

i WiSH i CouLDnT reLAte tO ThEiR MUSIc

i wish i were dead

Quote:

Originally Posted by Graystorm (Post 590023)

Thanks Swallow, although I live in a condo neighbor hood and I don't think smashing ice cubes on the street would be the most socially acceptable thing to do

Who cares about socially acceptable? If it helps you, pleas go smash some ice cubes or something. If you can't though, I completely understand and accept that. Also, you're such a great person tbh and it literally made my day talking to you.

hey guys. just wanna let y'all know something

when i was a freshman in high school, i was a complete n00btastic boob. like, i was the worst of the worst of the newbies. i was the most cringey. i was cringier than the "smexy elmo" tag. it was bad.

my freshman year, i left my homecoming dance in tears and could barely come to school on monday because some asshole ruined my night. freshman year was when i came home from softball in tears every night and eventually had to go to therapy. freshman year was when i really started to feel i was failing.

sophomore year was when i tried hurting myself once. then twice. i was losing weight, but not in a good way. i hated my body. i hated myself. the therapy wasn't helping.

junior year was when i hurt myself more. and more. and more. i cried during tests and panicked in assemblies. i binged and then purged and then starved and then binged. my friend told me she'd almost killed herself. one time, i tried to overdose just to get out of work. it didn't work. i went anyway. it didn't stop. i hated everything about me.

this year, i'm still pretty anxious and depressed. i'm still fat and still struggling with my body. i still have self-image issues and have to fight self-harm. life is still hard. but you know what? this year, i won homecoming princess. somehow, a near majority of the school looked at the four preppy jocks, the three chorus soloists, and me, the fuckin weirdo in marching band who thought no one really liked her, and said, "yeah, she's cool. i'll vote for her." life may not go your way 100000% of the time, and things will sometimes be a struggle, but you are still loved. when the opportunity comes, you'll be surprised to learn how much.