The Writer's Block - Your emotional venting thread. I'll explain.

The Writer's Block (http://www.kidpub.com/forum3/index.php)

- Free advice (http://www.kidpub.com/forum3/forumdisplay.php?f=8)

- - Your emotional venting thread. I'll explain. (http://www.kidpub.com/forum3/showthread.php?t=2095)

Quote:

Originally Posted by rebecca (Post 421429)

So wish me luck for tomorrow. I have to survive the bitch-who-should-not-be-a-bitch again. And get to my spot first. And not kill the aforementioned bitch. It's illegal, last I heard. And it would prove all those retards right about me. I have violent impulses, yes. I just want to be left alone without anyone taking my spot in the library to read a book on mythology. Asian cultures here I come.

Good luck.

Quote:

Originally Posted by HeatherB (Post 421448)

We haven't discussed Chinese New Year in my family this year at all, which is really unusual, but I don't want to say anything about it.

mainly because
my gong-gong is kind of sick
ish
i guess
and he doesn't really like cooking anymore
so we just go out to eat
even though
he was the best cook ever
and i miss the meals that he'd make us
and i hope
this isn't his last
chinese new year

I hope your grandfather gets better. My own maternal grandfather needs to have a machine to assist his breathing but he's fine so far.

Quote:

Originally Posted by HeatherB (Post 421606)

any way the wind blows
nothing really matters

dad
please stop asking me if i'm okay
do you think i like lying to you?

parents in general
please stop talking about me behind my back
i do not like crying when i hear what you say
i just had to turn up my music almost full volume
because i couldn't listen any longer

parents in general, again
please stop asking me about my writing
yes it's great that you finally accept that i like writing
and writing is my thing
and i'm apparently quite good at it (?stilldebatable?)
but
when you guys get involved in the contests
it is HELL
having you henpeck me
and lean over my shoulder
i want my f*cking privacy
and some of the things i write (allofthem) are personal
and i don't like you checking up on my 'progress'
it was better when i was a just-for-fun writer
i f*cking hate competitions
but now
everyone expects so much of me
i'm not even gonna enter at this rate
and i really don't care
because
writing isn't something i do so you can critique it
and flaunt it
and brag over me when i win something
"look our daughter isn't a failure after all"
may not be your exact words
but that's what it feels like
and i just hate it
i don't like you guys anymore
it's fine to be supportive
but don't use me
i'm not your f*cking pet
i'm your daughter
i have feelings
and i only write in particular circumstances
checking up on me like you do with my homework does NOT help
because writing is not my homework
writing is my life
and yes, i'm writing now
and you assume i'm working on the contest entry
because i'm not allowed
to work on anything for fun anymore, i guess
and maybe that's not what you mean
but again
it feels like it
and now i'm crying
and you're going off to something at church
and i couldn't give less of a f*ck
and i'm just turning up bohemian rhapsody again
because
i can't deal with you right now
i'm glad you're gone
i don't like you hanging over my shoulder every f*cking minute of my life
you don't trust me
which is fine
you really have no reason to trust me
and i've never given you one
but i've always come through in the end
and i'm reliable
don't you see that i've nearly never let you down?
you just like to highlight my flaws
and only the really big things that i do
like winning some godforsaken contest that i really don't care about at all
and getting over 100% on a math test
i mean
whatever
that's not important to me, really
and it shouldn't be important to you
mom, you once told me
that you like the small things in life
and you appreciate them
but
you don't appreciate the small things about me
at all

so you think you can stop me
and spit in my eye
so you think you can love me
and leave me to die

Yeah, once I heard my relatives mention me, I cranked up the volume and continues reading.

Quote:

Originally Posted by HeatherB (Post 421660)

well
i skipped breakfast
and was thisclose
to not eating dinner
but
i'm eating dinner
and
i hate myself

Continue eating.

Well, my dad thinks his overreaction wasn't enough last night. I'm trying not to take sides, but I'd probably take my mum's. My dad is a total hypocrite, only picking on my mum's every word and acting like he's forgotten what he did last night.
'if you hadn't said that I was a dog (she said he sounded like a dog with his yapping and bickering) I wouldn't have reacted like that. My hands were shaking, you know.'
It's not my mother's fault that you don't have any fucking self-control.
She is NOT responsible for you smashing the sugar jar at breakfast.

Lots o' Embarrassment

*feels awkward about posting something so unimportant when compared to all the other problems everyone else on here is having* x_x

Okay, I admit it: There's a huge downside to online school. You can very easily stop physically writing things down on paper and start to stick to typing. And guess what happens? Yeah. Your handwriting goes berserk.

I'm a writer and I have horrible handwriting. There, I said it. ._. *is ashamed of self*

Also I may have forgotten some basic grammar terms when I have to apply them to other languages.

To myself:
Step one: Look up how to find the object and subject of a sentence.
Step two: IMPROVE ABILITY TO PHYSICALLY WRITE WORDS BY WRITING LOTS OF THINGS REALLY REALLY SLOWLY! ...Also practice cursive. (The cursive "z" is SO HARD to remember for me and I don't know why. x_x)

Quote:

Originally Posted by TheAshWolf (Post 421697)

x_x I have the same problem, y'know.
It's ... terrible.
My "v"'s look like an m. ._.

Pluzzle, you are definitely good enough.

It's surprising how I am the most constant one here.

Quote:

Originally Posted by pluzzle (Post 421700)

ugh

people kept looking at my wrist and asked me what happened and im all oh my cat is a little mental
i don't like lying to them. i hate it. i hate myself. i just hd;heopdr;n compared to you guys i have no problems and that makes me feel guilty ;~; i am lucky, my parents are kind i have good friends and i'm of adequate intelligence but for some reason it's not enough
i'm not good enough, i guess.
how long until i can get help, how long until i'm happy.

Depression isn't always caused by the problems, sometimes, depression just runs in the family or it's caused by chemical imbalances. Don't feel guilty.

My mother sometimes is depressed. Usually in winter.

Not always winter. Just usually. She's incredibly temperamental.

And SAD isn't a proper condition, it's a symptom. Usually of major depressive disorder, which sounds worrying. It doesn't last all winter, just for about a few days or so.

Got harrassed today by two random guys about two years older than me. .... I almost punched a guy in the face.... luckily he ran away before I could... Felt depressed the rest of the day. Am I that scary?

I KNOW HOW YOU FEEL.

Yes, violent impulses happen to me too.
And slight depression because I'm being bullied by a girl two years younger than me.