lvhamsters |
05-11-2014 01:30 AM |
Hai c: Sorry for what your about to read. If you don't want to, please don't. It's most likely going to be annoying and boring and I'm probably gonna sound really self conceited. But...erm....I just need to let it all out. I tried keeping a journal but I'm terrified someone's going to find it and read it. That wouldn't end well. Anyways....sorry again. If I don't let it out I might explode. Anyways.....so lately I've been really angry and really sad and it's getting difficult to hide. I went through a period of multiple days where people kept asking me what was wrong but I didn't reply. It was one of those things where they ask what's wrong just as a courtesy, not because they really care. And then there's the friend I'm closest with. She was one of the one's who asked me what's wrong. Then a couple days later she saw my scars. Big mistake on my part .-. She asked me what they were and how I got them. I wasn't expecting it so my....lying.. wasn't as great as normal. Usually I can just make an excuse super quickly, but I stuttered and eventually replied with 'i don't know'. She didn't really press on the subject and hasn't brought it up again. I guess I should've told her. I've been wanting someone to find out, truthfully. I don't want to tell them directly, but I do want them to know. I need someone to talk to. I know I have you guys but you won't always be here v.v I just. Bleh. She hasn't been a good friend lately. She hurt my other friend by leading him on and then telling him to go away and I still haven't forgiven her for that yet. aS:DFJAS:DF. WHY DOES THIS HAVE TO BE DIFFICULT. Narrowing this down because I'm tired of typing.....I hate life. I hate myself. I'm letting out my anger and sadness on my friends and family. I need to find new friends or just push everyone away and be on my own, which I might be fine with because I've been hating people lately, and I'm sick of everything. Sorry that was so annoying and drama filled and long .-. If none of you respond I don't mind, just as long as I get it out and just as long as someone at least see's it. I don't know why that's a comfort. eh. So how's everyone?
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