seeing people's scars is so fucking hard

why will no one take me seriously just bc i am a freaking girl
why is everything so gender biased

NOPE IW AS JUST OVERREACTINGG
fuckinganxietttttttttttty

you alright, love?

i feel really bad when people talk about seeing self harm scars because it's like "you guys have a problem you've overcome or you've had serious issues in the past and i'm sitting here with a bunch of scars from when i was 11 because i have a habit that i can't get out of even though there's no real serious issue causing it"

like, if you've ever cut, you know it's bad and it's a triumph to end it. so i almost feel guilty about having similar issues about covering up scars and talking about my skin because i haven't had an issue like this. and i don't want one either. i'm not trying to romanticize cutting or anything because DAMN that's pretty messed up if something hurt you that bad that you felt the need to do this. like, rude, what the hell, karma. this person didn't deserve this.

as for me, i don't even know if it can be considered dermatillomania or just some habit i haven't been able to get rid of for years and that's only getting worse. so i try to doodle over my scars in pen and last year i pretty much refused to wear shorts because of how many scars i got from mosquito bites. but now that summer's coming up, yeah, it's going to be hard for me to see other people's scars too. for reasons i can't quite explain any more than i just tried. but bless y'all who have scars from the past that you've accepted and gotten over or even just ignored until you loved yourself again; you are some of the strongest people i know, honest

so sorry for throwing off your post, but it reminded me of something and i guess i wanted to rant somewhere. TT^TT sorry

i swear i am never working here again ever bc no one will listen to me at all
like just because im younger, and im female, and im really anxious about everything, and i have like a 15 second attention span and will not hesitate to doodle over everything im given, it doesn't mean im an idiot.
and my sis has this thing where she'll bite her nails and even her actual fingers until they bleed. it's gone so far that you could see her bones at one point, and it was scary. i didn't know what happened to her. i thought she was intentionally harming herself or something. so i was really afraid for her and i was a bit shocked but also weirdly relieved when i found that she was literally just biting her fingers all along. and i have these weird scars all over my thighs and stomach and i don't know how they got there but they're super obvious which is actually one of the reasons i quit swim team and why i don't usually wear shorter skirts. i don't know what happened, one day they weren't there, then they showed up and my mom thought someone got into a fight with me or that i tried to hurt myself.
random tangent: and sometimes i feel bad for being in control of everything like i am now because there are people who are actually suffering and i haven't even heard of what they've been through and i wish i could relate but instead i just don't have feelings most of the time and i want to help but i simply can't relate at all and what the hell am i even talking about anymore

it's 1pm and i haven't eaten today and i'm not having lunch and i don't want to eat all day for some weird reason
why does food suddenly disgust me

EDIT: OMG I REALLY FREAKING NEED TO EAT

Even If It's Like A Piece Of Bread Or Something Sugary Make Sure U Get Some Food In U

Like, Sugary Gum Even. So Long As You Get Some Energy. Eat An Entire Thing Of Tic Tacs If U Have To, But Don't Go Without Food For Too Long D8

aw thanks, but you don't need to worry about me this much <3 i'm home now so i can finally get food! really, i didn't even feel that weak. it's so weird. like, even grandmother of all people seems concerned now, but i feel so strong that i literally just picked up three chairs at once in band and everything, and i don't even feel weird and bloated like i usually do if i eat too much. i think i might need to see a doctor about my weird metabolism o.o
my dad's joking about how the food i'm eating now is technically my breakfast. it's 3:45.

hahahahahha also this girl i lowkey hate is asking me what the homework was and i literally just sent her a link to the school website and said "why don't you find out for yourself?" I LOWKEY HATE TOO MANY PEOPLE IN BIO CLASS IT'S NOT FUNNY ANYMORE
she just replied "ohhh lol thanks~" XD WHEN WILL SHE UNDERSTAND THAT I LOWKEY HATE HER XD

I Just Had A Really Good Day

My Gf And I Went To A Park And Hung Out And Kissed And Stuff

I Love Her So Much