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but i'm just gonna waddle over and hug you until you're uncomfortable or you feel better. because you're loved and cared for and valued, even by strangers who only know you over the internet. But we would still be upset if you died. and whenever i feel suicidal (NOT SUGARCOATING IT) i think about the news reports on people who have commited suicide. I try to imagine my still body in a coffin or my pictures as the only things my family can remember me by or how many terrible people will consume the world if I just give up and stop being uniquely me. If you think about this for a long time, you might be able to scare yourself away from actually doing anything harmful. as for the hate part, imagine a younger version of you sitting nearby. tell them all the terrible things you tell yourself and imagine their reaction, their horror, and their big ugly tears as they wonder why someone would say such mean things to them. This is what you're doing to yourself. and none of us have to do it. Yes, it's hard to stop, but at least thinking about it like this makes it go away a little (or at least replaces those terrible feelings with slight guilt). So keep yourself safe and know that we love you, no matter what |
hey guys i spent the past few days in a mental hospital for suicidal ideations.
it is not pleasant at all. it helps though. it helps in that its so fucking terrible that you realize that yes, you do in fact want to be alive for better shit than that. stay alive kids. stay safe. |
A guy flirted with me today. c:
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COSMO ATY... THANK u.... C:
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i am glad u r feeling better friend :) |
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even though i'm only a native speaker in english lol all of my friends speak 2+ languages fluently and i'm just here like #unilingual XD |
okay so
i had this project due in last monday. on sunday, i asked my teacher for extra time bc of someone in my family going to the hospital and also because i was really overwhelmed bc i chose to do a really complex version of the assignment. she gave me until thursday but she said i could ask for more time if i needed to. the thing is, i really couldn't concentrate. like, i tried so damn hard and it didn't work. usually the pressure kicks in but it didn't work and i was already feeling like shit so yeah nice addition to the week and then the weekend passed, i still didn't do anything about the project bc i had two other academic events that were happening sunday and monday. i literally only did like 14% of this thing. today my teacher talked to me abt not handing it in and then she had to talk to the highschool coordinator and just? that was so stressful in itself but luckily i didn't get in trouble bc when i explained they said that i was obviously v overwhelmed and that maybe i shoudl talk to our school counselor and they were really nice abt it and that was a relief and then when i did go and see the counselor she found out abt how i was cutting ughughugh and idk whether she's told my parents yet but i'm super stressed out and though in school it felt rly good to talk about things at last but ugh i just feel miserable and awful and empty hahaha i reallyreally want to die rn lol <please don't quote? ty> |
i don't know
i don't know how to handle everything that's being thrown at me right now |
I asked my mom if she and dad were getting a divorce.
She said she didn't know. She's never said that. Guys...I'm so scared...I dunno if anyone cares anymore, but please...I'm so scared... |
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