I don't even know what the hell I'm typing anymore, and I don't know even now. I don't feel like me, and I guess that sucks, but you know, I guess that;s totally normal right? Every time I go to school, everything happens, no I take that back, nothing happens. Things just keep piling up, piling higher and higher and heavier and heavier. I should stop coming to this thread, because all I want to do is feel sorry, and the way it goes for me, is I practically absorb the emotions because of my over average EQ that I have. My dad says that's a good thing, that I have such a high, EQ, but WHY? So WHAT. It makes me feel depressed. But you know what I learned? I can't feel bead for myself. I guess it's self esteem. And maybe that is what all this shit is about, self esteem. Cause, sometimes I'll come here, and read everything. When someone reads this rant of mind, I don't want to hear any of the "oh, you'll make it through" shit or the "good for you". Or "sweetie, don't worry". What the hell is that? Strength is in you. We might need support, and yes, hell yes, we need support, but we don't need canes to lean on. We have legs. We can walk and talk, and if we were ducks, we could lay eggs too. Anyway, I don't know if I have a point, but my point is that this isn't you. When I post here? Not me. That isn't Sophia. Sophia is a rebel, an artist, singer, a music maker. All of you, you aren't you when you post this stuff. The grass is more resilient, if we were like the grass, we would be perfect. Stepped on, and spring back up again. Bringing back to the subject of self esteem. This is all about self esteem, and when you let depression rear it's ugly head, it's clogging the self esteem that you need. You know what? The point IS THIS. Depression is showing it's STUPID face, and SELLING you this shit. But you know what? THE CUSTOMER IS ALWAYS RIGHT.

Well, I have the rest of the week off. :D

Me too, I've had ALL week off. :3

The last day of school until it turns into Christmas Holiday is on the end of the world! >:D

They're not bullying me. They are annoying and making me feel depressed just because I have a crush. >->

Okay...bigger rant.

I don't know EXACTLY how to type this out so it can make sense but people know who I like but I shouldn't care but, apparently, I do. ,_, It makes me feel like they are asking:

"Max, Max, Max! You like *insert her name*, don't you?" They ask me this every single time of my days in these last 4 weeks at school and it is bloody annoying. ._. I don't know if it is just me but people should lay off others and give them a bit of spare time to themselves if they want to like someone...it's not like that to those people.


They want to know MORE.

I went through a lot of that in 5th and 6th grade. x_x And let me tell you, those kids had some dirty minds. You can't even imagine the untrue rumors they cooked up about me and this one guy. And then, the moment they got tired with those rumors, they moved on and paired me with ANOTHER guy. It was like I couldn't talk to a boy without everyone saying we were dating or he kissed me or I was kajbkjabfkajdbf--it was horrible. >_< I kind of know how you feel, then.

Truth is, Max, kids can be really sadistic. ._. They take pleasure in watching you get embarrassed. I have no idea why, but it amuses them. The only way to lessen the blow of their rumors is to try to act like you don't care. Also, tell these kids that the rumors they're spreading are so ridiculous, you're not going to waste your breath by addressing them anymore. It takes a while before you totally get used to ignoring stuff like that, but it's possible. It's kind of like harsh sandpaper on rough wood. Eventually the wood gets smoothed out and sandpaper has nothing left to grind down, so there isn't nearly as much stress being put on the wood. ^_^

They're just trying to get your goat. ._. And people do tend to like to snoop in other people's business. I'm sorry you have to put up with this, Max... D:

Oh, they did that to me too.... I could list them all, the things that they did...

They hit me with things, threw stuff at me, told my crush/only friend that I hated him and talked trash about him... Stole my stuff...

Yes, these kids in my school have very dirty minds. There are heaps of people who just think very wrong stuff and there are times when they are so stupid and their annoyance is hatred to me that the teachers need to let them to go to the office or random crap like that. :P The thing is that I think that some of the GIRLS in my school have really dirty mins and they think of stuff like kofkdsjndkejfioejf--I can't say it on KP. It's just that wrong! They all think people can like one another and I like this girl--I really do--but they need to lay off and give me some time to think about it. People say that some other kids are "going out" which apparently means hanging out with each other at snack or lunch break. O___o DX What the heck, dudes? *_* God bless them for their wrong minds.

I have also found out that I strongly believe in God. Which is random on this topic.

Eh. I honestly don't have experience in that area... Kids were downright cruel, and they found anyway to hurt me. It didn't have to do with being curious... I guess I'll go now... *slinks away*

Ash, a question.
 

Ash, sorry if I sound stalker-ish, but do you allow your face to be on the Internet? Just a question.

;w; I'm sorry, Lily...

>_< And it only gets worse as they get older. e_o Their minds are like air filters that get dirtier and dirtier the longer it's used. It's disgusting. It's pathetic. And that's NOT going out! O_O That's just sitting with someone! All these ridiculous kids think they know what dating is, but they don't. They're just that--kids. Yes, crushes that start when you're a kid CAN (but usually don't) lead to a mature relationship that lasts for years. But that's further down the road. (On a slightly off-topic note, I've actually known many couples who have been married for decades that met when they were kids...^_^ 'Tis so sweet...)

You do? That's great, Max! :D I've always believed in God. If you ever have any questions about something, feel free to ask me, okay? The Bible isn't as hard to understand as most churches make it out to be.

You're awesome; helping me! ^_^ You're the best friend!

I do have one question: Is Ares a god or goddess?

You don't sound like a stalker. XD That's a totally normal question, nowadays, what with all these people running around on Facebook and stuff. >_> (I don't have a FB account, by the way, and I don't EVER want to get one.)

Simply put, no. :D Nope. Nonononononooo. x_x I've made it painfully clear to all of my friends and family that if they take a picture of me, they are NOT to put it in any of their online albums. Ever. I don't even post pictures of people I know on those kinds of online albums you have to sign in and get approved to view. I'm THAT cautious about me and my family being up for the Internet to see. XD XD DX DX

I don't even know if I'm going to be able to scrounge up the courage to put a picture of myself on the back of WOT when I publish. ;w; I'm just...*shudders* I'm not much to look at, anyway, but the thought of any random person online knowing what I look like scares the living daylights out of me. ._. *headdesks*

...Why do you ask? XD

Actually, I said I was going, but just want to bring one thing up with Ash... not to create an argument.... But before... a while back.. on the gay marriage thread... you said you were against it... why exactly? If you don't want to answer, I don't care, just want to know...

<:^J Aww, I'm just glad that I could do anything at all to aid you....kids can just be so MEAN...x_x I hope this gets better for you, Max.

o_0 Ares is the Greek god of war, and thus part of Greek mythology, and doesn't actually have much to do with the Bible. :3

Oh, I just wanted to know if you were putting it on WOT. :P
I may put mine on FW but I'm not sure. ._. I feel like making a Tribute to You. :D

I hope so, too! :D

Thanks for that answer, Ashley! :D My mum has the Bible so when I finish a few of my books I am reading now, I will read it for the second time. :3 How is WOT going, anyways?

do you want to go back to AN?

Ash? ^=^ Are you there?

I might. I might not. I REALLY want to. (What author wouldn't want their photo on the back of their first book?! o.o) But I'm scared, kinda. XD XD DX DX

Didn't you put a picture of yourself on Time to Rhyme?

O_O A tribute? XD Whaaaaat? I don't need no tribute. How would you even...? Heh, Max, you're too sweet. :o Really, you don't have to do that. I just hate seeing you so depressed about these things.

There are many different translations of the Bible, you know, and not all of them are totally correct, and pretty much all of them omit God's personal name.

WOT's going well. ^_^ I can't wait for my favorite Amber quote to come into the plot...it's right around the corner...XD I laugh every time I think about it.

<:^J Ash, if they find out your face; what you look like, your dad will know and then, he can help you!

I did but I'm not sure about it now...might, as well. :D

You DO need a tribute, Ash, you do, really. I'm not joking!

I know that some of them are different than one another and there might be different things to come around about God like the consequences of what would happen if you pray. I pray, sometimes, like last night!

When will it come in? Chapter 13? When will it be out?

o_o I don't even know WHY I ever went on that thread...*headdesk* x_x

Simply put, I do not support gay marriage because God does not support gay marriage. Jehovah God put together the entire concept of marriage, and made it perfectly clear that it was to be between a man and a woman, ONLY. (He married Adam and Eve together. Not Adam and Bob. Not Eve and Sally. Yes, I know, there is no Sally and Bob in the Bible, I'm just using that to make a point. <:^J) The Bible tends to group "men who lie with men" and vice versa with thieves, drunkards, idolaters, fornicators, and greedy people when it comes to the degree of how much God is against the idea. So, they're not like murderers or anything in his eyes. Also, just to be perfectly clear, I do NOT believe in Hell (because, contrary to what the churches say, the Bible does NOT talk about something called Hell, or any kind of eternal torment for "bad people"), so I thus do not believe that gay people go to Hell, so please don't get me wrong. ^_^

If you (or anyone else, for that matter) ever has any more questions about my beliefs and why I stick to them, or the logic behind them, feel free to ask me anytime. :D

I know, I don't have much to worry about...as long as I don't go around spouting my address and phone number, I'm perfectly safe, even if people DID know exactly what I look like. >_> But I'm still paranoid. There are a LOT of demented, creepy people out there, and they might not stalk me, but they can do other things with that picture and I just can't kjbdkjbkjbafk. *hides under coffee table* ;w;

XD No, I don't.

You prayed last night? ^_^ That's very good! Did you know that the Bible gives an example of the right way to pray, and whose name you should pray through?

Ch. 13 SHOULD be posted sometime this week. :D *has Thanksgiving break off of school so I have more time YAY*

Ash, (weird random question) : What do you think of NaNoWriMo and would you like to do it?

You do. XD XD DX DX

I did. Really, I should see that!

YAY! :D MORE WOT!

OMG...I can't write this new chapter of FW. >_>

...On a totally random note, did you just put part of Somebody That I Used to Know into your sig, or am I seeing things? o.0

I would LOVE to do NaNoWriMo. It looks really fun. ^_^ I just don't have the time for it. x_x

NO I DON'T. ;w; Stop it, you. XD

Yep. ^_^ There's the model prayer Jesus gave, but that was just meant to be a guideline, not something you're supposed to chant over and over, you know. :3

Having WB again? x_x

I put Somebody That I Used To Know in my sig since I needed a new signature that has some lyrics to the song. ^_^

You and me should do KidPubember (Novel Writing Month but in December!); do you want to do it?

Oh...okay. :D

Yes, I am. x_x

POEM.

http://www.kidpub.com/story/dont-ask...er-p-747131083

That song always brings back so many fond memories for me. ^.^ (I don't know why it seems like a lifetime ago, but it does. o.e) Driving to my adult BBF's work for her bring-your-kid/niece/whatever-to-work-day and watching her listen to it for the first time over the radio......driving to the convention center and wondering why it was so cool outside.....but, now, mostly, it just makes me tear up a little bit. X_x I can relate to every last lyric in Somebody That I Used To Know, ESPECIALLY Kimbra's part. No, obviously, I can't relate to it in its intended sense (a couple breaking up), but in a totally different way...and yet, it all just....fits. O_O "Now and then I think of all the times you screwed me over, but had me believing it was always something that I'd done. I don't want to live that way, reading into every word you say..." kajdkjgjkdgajkdhf Heartbreak, I can feel my heart breaking all over again.... ;w;

...
o_o Sorry for that rant. XD XD DX DX No clue where it came from. ANYWAY.

I've never heard of KidPubember. O.o :3 Is it the same as NaNoWriMo?

Yeah, it's the same as NaNoWriMo except a different month and name! ^_^ Do you want to o it with me in December? The goal is 50,000 words. :D You might need to plan the plot or something. :P

NO worries about rants, at all! ^_^ I had a rant about breathing an it went on for 5,000 words. O________________________O

Ash, you on? ^_^

What can you do when you are a victim, but no-one believes you?

I've been crying for the past hour and a half.
I've had to go home from school.
I was assulted (physically) in school, but I told too late and now the evidence is against me.
Plus, I wrote a letter explaining it to the head of KS3, but my style is too much like a fairy-tale and very elaborate. And everyone thinks I am the attacker, not the victim.
What do I do?

Guys, please help.

Aww, girly! I'm sorry. *hug* I'm sorry you feel that way,we all have bad moments in our lives, and we all have to face them. I know it's hard, but I am here with you :D

Eff eff eff.
Please please please don't start, it won't make things better. Dx Even if it does give you a high, it won't last forever and you'll want more. And it'll get worse. It'll make other things worse.
Drink coffee and scribble on yourself with a pen instead.
I feel kind of useless… I don't know what you can do. :/ Isn't there someone who will believe you?

Nope, no-one.

Not even cheeze? :/
I guess just… don't stop defending yourself, but try to let it drop? :^I