Originally Posted by pluzzle (Post 479366)

Everyone here needs to look up Emma Blackery on youtube. Warning: A LOT OF SWEARING XD
But seriously, she's funny. She did a thing on depression the other week. You should watch it :3

*hugs everyone*

Originally Posted by Confuzzled (Post 479370)

I don't feel like I fit here. I mean, people are really nice to me and all, but whenever I am talking in a conversation I always just kind of fade out because I don't know what peoples are talking about or I can't look at/do what they can... it's just frustrating. And to add on I feel like I'm acting so, I don't know, desperate and clingy to people because I'm so afraid that I'll lose relationships. And I don't have any best friends in real life either, no one to really feel to. Ya know what I mean? Just forget it.

Originally Posted by SilverMoon (Post 479377)

I haven't used this thread in a while. Sometimes my negativity flares up, and I'm a bit more edgy than usual, and occasionally I just can't take it and let the tears come. However, usually this happens at night, when I am completely alone. But I do have salvation, and I'm pretty much doing fine. The only thing the public notices is my edginess. It is nearly physically impossible for me to cry around others. I honestly have no idea why. But then again, I'm mostly doing fine.

I feel extremely nostalgic sometimes, I really miss the old times and those who were in them with me. Sometimes I feel so alone, but I know I have friends who have my back. My sources of salvation are strong, and I manage to remain content, for the most part.

An extremely true statement right here:
There's no need to change the past. Because of it we are who we are now. Every second, every action from then is linked to us here and now.

Originally Posted by AlgebraAddict (Post 479286)

*too lazy to find post to actually reply to*

Just to let you know, Sandy, I had severe hallucinations during the school year. They got better over the summer, but it still happens. Anyway, I'm here to talk or e-mail if you need. I'm always open.

Originally Posted by lvhamsters (Post 479254)

Originally Posted by Sandy (Post 479414)

Oh my god, thank you so much, AA. I feel so unbelievably insane sometimes and I beat myself down for it, and I feel like I'm on a level that's below human. I'm so glad that you told me. I'll definitely keep that in mind.

Originally Posted by AlgebraAddict (Post 479425)

*hugs* You're not unbelievably insane, and you don't need to beat yourself down. You can talk to me anytime. You might not see things, but if you do it helps a lot to draw them. And using tiger balm in the mornings helps creeping feelings or whatever (I had weird feelings of electricity). The main thing is killing off stress and getting a lot of sleep, even if you think you don't need it.

Originally Posted by Sandy (Post 479434)

I've never tried drawing what I've seen... I have noticed though that my visual hallucinations are a lot more horrific than the auditory ones. Sometimes I'll feel hands on me, and my brain will "recognize" them as belonging to someone I know but that's the only physical thing I've ever felt, although on most occasions it's a precursor to an auditory/visual hallucination. I suppose I could draw what I've seen but I'm not sure what I would do with them, since my family won't react well to this at all, nor do I want to be taken out of school or take medication. But I do agree, it's almost directly related to my stress... Anyways, sorry for rambling. I was crying earlier but talking about this has really calmed me down... Thanks.

Originally Posted by Lily09 (Post 479259)

It took a long time for me to hate myself, and it's going to take a long while back to love myself too.
It's going to be a long journey for everyone to love themselves, once they've been conditioned to hate themselves.
But no, you can't just stop.
You don't just wake up one day saying, "Wow, I'm an amazing person!"
Nope. Doesn't work like that. Just like people can't stop abusing drugs suddenly, just like people can't stop abusing alcohol whenever, just like people can't stop cutting instantly. Just like people can't stop depression. A snap of fingers doesn't make the self-loathing go away. It doesn't, if it did, don't you think we wouldn't be as fucked up here? We tried that already. You don't 'just stop'. It's not something you can whiz away. Why is it so hard for people to understand that?
People are beautiful. Everyone here is beautiful and wonderful and amazing. And people shouldn't hate themselves. But when a person does reach the point to where they truly hate themselves, you don't tell them to 'just stop', because you cannot just stop. Saying that is not helpful. It just shows that you don't understand.

Sorry if this was so blunt, but it needed to be said.

Originally Posted by HeatherB (Post 479442)

thank you for this post so so much i was gonna say something like that but then i deleted it *huggles you*

and speaking of self-loathing, it's never been this bad.