The Writer's Block - Your emotional venting thread. I'll explain.

The Writer's Block (http://www.kidpub.com/forum3/index.php)

- Free advice (http://www.kidpub.com/forum3/forumdisplay.php?f=8)

- - Your emotional venting thread. I'll explain. (http://www.kidpub.com/forum3/showthread.php?t=2095)

Quote:

Originally Posted by cloudwriter (Post 520126)

I guess I just want to be noticed
to know what it's like to have someone notice me
and like me
someone who I actually like back

but i'm afraid to do that i'll have to turn into someone opposite myself
someone I promised myself i'd never become
but damn, I just want to be noticed for once in my life
and i'm aware I sound very whiny and attention-seeking
so yeah disregard this post I just needed to vent somewhere

no you are not whiney or attention seeking. what you're feeling is actually completely normal and don't worry YOU WILL NOT HAVE TO CHANGE YOURSELF TO FIND THE PERSON OF YOUR DREAMS

there is a very special person in my life who notices me and reciprocates my romantic feelings and we do everything together but I never have had to change myself for him because the right person loves you for who you are and there is going to be someone okay *hugs*

last Thursday I got the closest I've ever gotten to killing myself.

I had a bottle of pills in one hand and a suicide note in the other

and then I heard this little beep and it was my soul sister talking to me on google hangouts and she was like "I know you had a rough day and I want you to know that I love you forever and ever"

and then I was okay but I mean what would have happened if she hadn't pressed send at that exact moment

Disappointing people is one of the worst shits ever.

Quote:

Originally Posted by AlgebraAddict (Post 520131)

fuck okay omg *hugs*
can you promise me something? if you ever get that bad/that close again, message me, okay? or email me or send me a message on tumblr or something
even if you think no one cares just do it okay
*hugs you to death*

Quote:

Originally Posted by AlgebraAddict (Post 520131)

if you ever get that close again send me an email (charliisallama@gmail.com)
srsly *tackles you with hugs*

That hurt. My friend made me feel really special. He would always say these kind things that made me feel better about myself. Then I realized he said those things to everyone and that I was nothing special. And then one of my other friends blew me off yesterday to hang out with another friend. Once again supporting the idea that I'm nothing special. I'm someone that no one really needs. That they go to when they need help or to show something off, just like my best friend. She never talks to me anymore. She's even started to put me down to her other friends. And then there's my brother. He already says he hates me and tells me to go kill myself and blah blah blah I've already told you people what he's done. And my parents? Never there. Simple as that.
What I'm getting at is nobody would care if I left. I mean, maybe kidpub, but I don't really have any good good friends on here. I've just been really struggling lately and I came close to ending everything three times. I needed to get it out somewhere, and I know I need to get help, but I can't. I physically and emotionally can't. I just don't know how much longer I can go on. I just keep relapsing and the scars keep building up and I'm so lost. I don't know what to do. I know there's not much you guys can do but just by having someone read this and know what's going on is a small weight off my shoulders. Sorry if you did read this.

Quote:

Originally Posted by lvhamsters (Post 520139)

1. you're v pretty
2. v good singer
3. wow you're cool

three good reasons why you're special :cool:

please stay

Quote:

Originally Posted by AlgebraAddict (Post 520131)

What pluzzle said.
You know we all care about you. You know I love you to pieces. If you did that I'd cry. Me. I would be in tears. We've never even met but you mean a lot to me.
AA.
Please don't do that. I know I'm being selfish but it would break my heart (not to mention the effect upon your family and those around you) and waste your life and immense talent.
You're a genius. Don't let that go to waste. Make something of it.
I'm not overly good at these speeches, but I just wanted to let you know how much I care.

Quote:

Originally Posted by lvhamsters (Post 520139)

hey hey hey hey
*hugs you*
i know we don't talk that much, but honestly i've always thought you're hella cool. you ARE special. you're you and no one else is like you. you're kind and sweet and funny and a good writer and a good artist and you're a hella friend and you're really pretty and you're a gREAT singer
but yo dude okay if you're thinking of killing yourself again, email me or message me on skype or something, okay?? i will literally drop everything, whether i'm at work or in the middle of a test at school or even if i have to stay up all night to make u feel better, to try to help you because you're that fucking important okay
*hugs*
don't kill yourself.

(also yo u should start getting on skype more anyway so we can talk bc you're hella \o/)

Do you ever just feel like crying but nothing is wrong? Like, I'm sitting here, half in tears, FOR NO REASON, when I actually had a pretty good day. whAT THE HELL