I'm going to take a break from kp.
The goodbye thread has more specific things but I feel depressed just on kp.
I'll live on WB tho so you can still talk to me

yeah so i had a shitty day in general. i woke up late, had a hellish math exam, got held late in the class before lunch because people wouldn't shut up, then an incredibly frustrating "debate", i totally choked during choir placements and messed up, then i stayed after school to set up a table for the writer's club and only managed to pass out like ten flyers total.
also i've had killer cramps and headaches all fucking day and that sucks.

what's the point.

Love is the point, so keep going. B)

So I had a great day, yet I still feel like crap.

I'm so proud of my self portrait art piece, and my art teacher even pulled me aside after class to tell me I was doing a really good job with it and she really liked it. We played a game in Math (sort of like wheel of fortune) and I guessed the hardest puzzle right (the teacher said it was the fastest anyone had ever guessed it) plus my team won and got 5 extra credit points. And there was a pep rally and it's Friday.

So why do I still feel like crap?

I know. I honestly can't describe to anyone how I feel right now because I barely even know how to describe the feeling to myself. It's like I'm silently screaming inside but the sound refuses to come out. It's like my heart is slowly ripping in half, like everything's falling apart and I have no power to put it all back together with my bloody hands.

God, why does it hurt so much? I'm trying to tell myself that just because he hasn't texted me back since yesterday doesn't mean he hates me, but I can't help going through all of the dumb and pointless 'what ifs' in my mind. I've tried to tell myself he's busy. But he's always texted me, every day, and now, suddenly after three weeks there's nothing. And besides, he was on Facebook for 20 straight minutes last night from his phone, which means he probably got my text...

I just feel like now he's starting to get accepted into the more popular circles (even though he's more of a loner like me) and I'm going to be thrown away and forgotten about. A lot of people like him, and if I don't do anything else soon, I'm going to have to be ripped in half even more to see him with another girl. And I can't text him too many times in a row without no reply because no one wants to be that annoying person....

And one last thing. It figuratively kills me inside every day to see you. Walking to school. In the hallways. Passing by the math room. At the pep rally. To watch you and know that you have no idea that I'm the girl from Facebook. And every time we have brief eye contact, I have to look away and pretend like you're just another stranger and it's so hard </3

I just feel awful and have no clue what to do.

please don't do this you're worth so much to this world

doesn't feel like it

i know it doesn't and i know that my words probably feel so empty and i'm so sorry for that but you really mean a lot

sorry. thanks.