Tired
 

I haven't been sleeping well. IDK why!

If you just recently started school, that might be the issue. Since I would stay up so late in the summer, I would go to bed at nine and randomly wake up at three in the morning for most of the first week.

Just try to relax your mind. Let your thoughts ramble for awhile and keep your eyes closed. Don't re-hash that day.
Let starbucks handle the rest.

...
:I


I must live in a different part of Canada than her.

Thanks a lot, LST... For some reason, hearing (or reading, whatever) that from a guy seems a lot more legitimate than from a girl, because girls tend to just blurt out "ERMEGERD YOUR BEAUTIFUL&DA SMEXX, DONT FEEL BAD!" and flail it around like it's nothing.

(The pics that were on dA suck though... ;_;)

Yeah... I guess. It's just... I hate that this other part of me is forcing me through this. It's so... aghhh, it's so complex... I can't even explain it. =_=
Thanks for that bit of rationality, there... I needed it.

... Wow... o_o I'm not even very good... but thank you so, so much. You know that I feel the exact same way about your poetry, right? x_x

Again... thank you for taking the time to talk to me. <:^/ You really helped.

Awww, thank you. <:^J I've got some things I've been trying to work on (... like eyelids... >_>) and I wish that I had better stuff on there to show you, but thank you. <:^j

So... you're in a public school now? o_o How are you finding it (like, besides this)?
Ahhh... I remember the times when you would post about wanting to go to a public school and I would reply being like, "NO, NO, DON'T DO IT! WORST MISTAKE EVER!" XD XD DX DX
The fact that you find school slow isn't really a surprise to me--chances are you're probably the most dedicated and intelligent student there, right? I know how that goes... x_x
Wait... they don't have advanced classes where you are? You're in high school, right? Don't they have the Locally Developed-Applied-Academic thing, with at least some AP (advanced placement) classes?
I mean, I'm in IB and I find it so easy, I feel like I'm going to steal the diploma--then again, the Catholic school board took me in, pounded me into the ground, pummeled my face into the dirt, devoured me, chewed me up and spat me out until any complaints I had had been beaten out of me, so I guess ANYTHING would seem easy. OTL
How come you're concerned with how much you would fail if you DID have difficult homework? O_O I would relish every moment of not having crazy home assignments. XD Even if your homework WAS difficult, I'm pretty confident that you could tackle any task that the teachers flung your way. X^3
owo I'm actually really psyched for time to start picking up--I need this curriculum to really take flight! I'm sick of reviewing BEDMAS and integers--where's the mathematic relationship of the pattern of the hair on a man's head and lessons of divine proportion and physics I was promised? 8I

Yeah, it's more awkward, so… :P

"Not even very good"?
/rollsonthefloorlaughing

Helping at all is great. :^J


Yeah. :P It seems pretty cool for the most part, other than the slowness. And my not really being good at making friends/failing at being talkative.
So public school didn't go well for you? :/
I… dunno. Quite a few people seem to not really care about grades, and I don't think I've heard anyone say anything about caring a lot about their grades. /shrugs Whereas I find a 98% per cent infuriatingly disappointing. xD
Yeah to both, pretty much. There are, like, only two Honours classes and they're for seniors/people in twelfth grade. :^/ Which really really really p**ses me off. Though in junior and senior year you can do dual enrolment at a local college…
Wait, Catholic school board? I thought you'd went to public school? Was it really difficult or just… meh?
Because I tend to procrastinate and be slow about doing homework. :/
The end of the last sentence of your post is… xD

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FLkMA3wn70Q
*Death stares* You're awesome enough that even people on the internet who have never met you would miss you.

I'll sum this up in three words.
I. Am. Insecure.

I am in war with Owen.

I feel like Hermione in Math so far...move on to algebra already!

Mreh.


I want to vent.

But I don't.

But I do.

But I don't.

I really don't.

And then there's my sister.

It's messed up.

It sounds like some kind of great novel.

It's not.

Gah.

disappointed/I don't know what to call it.:(:confused:

The other day I found this place near my house. A willow tree shrouded it and it was beautiful. I went through the leaves, and there was this big willow tree, with a sloping trunk that was quite thick. There weren't branches until about three metros up, and at the start of the branches there was a natural hole in the tree, big enough for someone small like me to squeeze into. Today I went again, with some ropes. My parents wouldn't let me go by myself, so my sister came along. I tried and tried to climb up, but I kept slipping. My sister, instead of helping, discouraged me and told me I'd never make it up. As soon as I got a bit up the tree, the wind picked up and I slipped again. I gave up. I ran home and ran to my room and cried. And cried.
My sister told my mum what happened, and mum rudely asked me why I ever thought I could get up the tree. I shrugged and then she told me I shouldn't get so worked up about the tree.
It took me an hour, but now I know why it upset me.
The tree was like something from my stories. Climbing it and getting up to the hole was like something my characters would do. The mystery, and utter fantasy-ness of it was magical. I felt like climbing up it would be entering my story world, and getting away from reality. The branches would cover me from the storm of reality. And when my sister told me to give up, it was a slap in the face.
I'm acting like a five year old. But I can't help it.

I sometimes wish that every day I could curl up on a chair by a window, snow falling slightly as I read peacefully, without a worry.

I want to be able to get a good education and become an author, but I miss the days when I didn't have many worries. I'm almost afraid of progress.

Delighted :D
 

YAY THE CHIEF EXECUTIVE HAS TAKEN BACK NATIONAL EDUCATION!
At least, we wouldn't have National Education in these three years.
YAY SCHOLARISM!
Thank you for your hunger strikes!
Keep your blood sugar up!
(Sorry, I'm really hyper now. I got the news last night but was too sleepy to do anything but postpone this posting until afternoon xD)
/throws black ribbons around.

Just thought I'd let everyone know, that September 10th is Suicide Awareness Day. Wear yellow, and write 'LOVE' on your wrist to show support for those who have tried, considered, or succeeded in taking their own lives.

I don't have yellow clothes...

Nor do I. I'm probably going to wear yellow accessories like pluzzle. (or colour my other accessories with highlighters because I don't think I even have yellow accessories)

Maybe I'll colour the hair band around my wrist with highlighter too, but I've got to whip it off the moment the Deputy Headmistress (or whoever she is) comes around, since it's forbidden to do that.
-_-

Blargh. Could you colour the ends of your hair with highlighter? You can wash it off quite easily.

Got school. The school has a problem with that.

http://24.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m7...c527o1_500.gif

Sorry, couldn't resist.

*u mad directioners?*

Thanks Cheeze for telling us that. I'll make sure to wear it during school.

Six teenagers are going to kill themselves on that day.


._.


The suicide rate for teens is six per day...

(*stays quiet*)

Mary Elizabeth:Yeah, I started school, but I mean I went to bed at 10 in the summer, and now I'm going to bet at 9. not a huge difference. But now I'm waking up at midnight, and can't fall asleep
Pears: Thanks for your help, but how would Starbucks help me? Isn't it coffee? But yeah, I do try to relax.

the.last.time.i.posted.on.here.for.advice.was.an.e xperiment..that's.why.you're.reading.this.like.thi s.i'm.almost.completely.certain.
Rant time:that.i.have.depression.i.don't.cut.but.i.do.scratc h.my.arms.and.the.inside.of.my.knees.alot..the.red ness.goes.away after.about.twenty. minutes.and.comes.on.the.arms.back.when.i.scratch. it.again.or.the.other.side.i.can.even.do.it.in.pub lic.without.anyone noticing..my.leg.has.been.bleeding.constantly.for. about.three.years.and.i.tell.people.that.it's.ecze ma.which.it.used.to.be..i'm.doing.this.for.you
I am so angry right now. Me and my brother were talking whilst he was playing piano, and he said: 'I'm sight-reading a piece that you couldn't even play if you worked on it.' So we started talking about how he's so much better than me at piano, and what the hell happened at my exam. We go to have dinner, and my dad's asleep on the couch.so.you.can.pretend you.didn't.see.it.but.if.you.quote.this.i'll.know. you.did.
My mum joins in the conversation, and she says that even though my brother is better than me at some things, I can't compare the thing that he's not as good at to the best people a that thing. This was about when I told him that I had seen four year old write better stuff than his essay, then proceeded to help him with it. I told her that my brother is the best at piano and maths, and he compares himself to me, so I should be allowed to compare him to the best, too. After a while, my brother leaves, and my mum is telling me that some people are better than things, and other people are better at others. She says that I am better at English and Art. (I completely suck at Art, but she's never seen any of my work, and the last time she did it was okay, plus I'm a girl)I say that I may be better than my brother at these things, but I'm not the best, while he is. My dad wakes up, and since he gets really angry for no reason when I say certain things, which I now know never to say in front of him, I don't say that while Maths, and piano in our 'community', is useful, writing and Art are not, because my dad would yell. My dad asks what I'm typing, and I tell him that I'm not writing. He asks about my NaNo, which my brother just had to tell him about, and I tell him that I gave up half way through because I couldn't write when I was in Ipswich. The two of them proceed to give me a lecture about how I should have predicted that, and set a lower target. (they told me that I wasn't going to go anywhere all month) They end the lecture by telling my, and I quote: 'You're never going to get bloody anywhere in life.' Cheery, yes? He then tells me to go and play the piano, which he always tells me to do even when I quit. (Mum simply refused to accept it, and whahey, I'm going back to lessons now.) if.you.think.i'm.being .melodramatic.and hormonal.then.go.ahead.and.pretend..i.won't.hate.y ou.for.it..when.i.was.playing.piano.i.scratched.my .arms
At this point I am very nearly crying, which I haven't done for any reason other than my dad for three years , but I go to play piano. It's luckily in the other room. I am really upset and angry at this point, but I have to pretend that I'm perfectly happy because he yells at me when I cry. So I choose the happiest piece I can find, and start to play it. I am aware that I can never play this piece again without being reminded of this incident, which is the same for my NaNo novel, which I now can't continue.
if.you're.reading.this.please.give.me.advice.if.yo u.don't.want.to.pretend
I don't expect any of you to give me advice, this is literally just a rant.

I am so sorry about your dad. Just talk to your mom, and see if she can help you with your dad. That's my suggestion. :eek:

'Tis actually World Suicide Prevention Day, I think. :P I heard about it the other day… Not about the writing love on your wrist or wearing yellow part. Seeing as I don't have any yellow clothes, I'll do the first.

Don't let it get any worse. Please. Advice about the part in white, or the rest…? I don't think you're being melodramatic.
:/ Your dad is wrong. You're an epik person and epik people get somewhere in life.

Maybe your brother is better at piano and math than you. But you're nice and a good writer and a good person. Whereas your brother sounds… not so nice.
*Hugs*

Thanks, it's okay, he's really nice a lot of the time, and when he is I just feel really guilty about complaining. I know it's not really healthy, but still. Besides, I doubt she would listen, really.

Thanks, I guess I really needed to hear that. I think I'm going to just have to accept that I'll never be quite as good as my brother, at least on these kind of things, but I'll do my best, and if all else fails I'm going to move to America. .-. . I think my brother's kind of nice to every one else though... *hugs back*

I really doubt that that will happen, but yay for writing!We should stop, shouldn't we? My leg's going to scar so much when I stop. Which I will.

._.

That awkward moment when you come home from having the best weekend you've spent in well over a year, and then log onto KP and see all your friends are doing bad.

...

*doesn't know how to respond to ANY of the venting posts*
;_; I'm sorry, guys. *runs away, ashamed*

This is from an article that XX posted a while ago:

"I knew a guy who was the shortest kid in his school - just five feet, two inches tall - and he never got taller. He was a black kid in a white town. And to top it all off, he had this very high, womanly voice and these effeminate gestures that just screamed "gay" every time he walked into a room, blared it like an air raid siren. And he wasn't even gay.

When I point out that he lived in the frozen wasteland of rural Minnesota, you can picture how often this guy got the crap kicked out of him by the racists and the homophobes and pretty much everybody else.

Should he have considered suicide? After all, he was already at an age when he knew he wasn't going to get any taller or whiter and his voice wasn't going to get any manlier. The kid wound up buying a guitar and, after some practice, recorded an album called Ode To My Pecker, which the record company insisted be changed to...

Purple Rain.


Life is a tricky thing to predict, that's the problem. Even if you don't have any kind of special talent, you don't know where the ride will to take you."

Prince!

^this

Thank you so much. This is such an inspiring story.

Frustrated.

The other day, before I went to school, I woke up late because I slept through my alarm clock, and I was late through the whole morning-routine thing. My dad drives me to school, and that morning he yelled at me with quite a few choice words. Then I was dropped off at school and my friend told me here were no guitars in Jazz Ensemble when I asked her, so we politely began to debate. My other friend got involved, and then she got mad at me for some reason and ignored me the entire day. Now, all of my friends besides her are in other classes and I'm too shy to meet anyone new in life outside the internet, so I went through that day, the weekend, and today alone. THen we started talking again and I felt better, but then she told me she was still mad at me. Apparently, she went to my other friends and complained about me and I don't even know WHY she's so ticked off at me. Until this morning, when I asked my third friend if she knew why she was ticked off at me and she said that my friend told her that she was mad at me because "I was giving her attitude". And I didn't.

*headdesk* She's given me drama for the last two years on and off, but she's really nice when she's not being dramatic. I've apologized to her and stuff, and I don't know what else she wants from me! :P

What I just said probably made NO sense, and if anyone could understand, you probably didn't think it's that big a deal. But outside the computer, I am very shy and blush way too easily and... stuff like that. Anyone know what to do?

blossom: Tell your friend that "You need to just let it go. If you have a problem with me. Tell me as soon as it happens, so I can try not to make you mad again." If stuff like that persists, (not the quote) you need to stop being friends with her if she keeps acting that way. And if it still doesn't stop, don't hang out with her anymore. Hope this helps! (Oh, and if you can't tell her, write her a note, explaining that you thought it would be better if you wrote her a note)

https://i.chzbgr.com/completestore/1...2jqXE8J1w2.jpg

*couldn't resist*

I feel so stupid saying this, since it's just eighth grade, but it's been hard trying to keep up with all the schoolwork. Math is at the very end of the day, so we never have any time to do the work at school, Spanish is pretty much all new to me, because we didn't do too much at my old school, and Science is just as bad.

I mean, I guess this'll prepare me for high school, but....I don't know.

You do realize that you were just complaining about someone not liking your drawing a few months ago, right? :rolleyes:

I was just playing Slender. I feel fantastic.