Originally Posted by maxi
(Post 480281)
Well, at times, I muck things up--FEAR NOT, that happens to many people around here on earth and it's just something that I am capable of and I can get used to. BUT I did figure out that sometimes I am crazy meaning I do really stupid things but I learn from them because I care about myself. Today I realised that some of the crazy/insane/weird things I do, I do them because I care about myself and also I know that I can do very weird things if I want to--I also do this because I know that I am crazy and I can be fun with myself sometimes. I need to look at this endless world, endless life, endless earth and know that it's going to be alright if I try different things. Some people say that the things I do are fake, weird, stupid, crazy, insane, terrible, horrifying and even...not worth doing--WELL. I figured out that I can do this. I can do this, do this, I can do whatever it takes to do anything. Being me means that I get to do weird things and everything is fine. I just need to remember that since I am me, I get to do whatever I want. See something in front of me, something dark, something mysterious and even something new or old and I run for it, knowing that I can do whatever I want with myself, with my life. I look at things differently and quite amazingly than other people would think of me. They think I can't do weird stuff because I am not capable of it? No, I can do whatever and I think I can do whatever I like and I think that I can think whatever I want to think and I can take the actions of whatever and I can say the things I want to say (some people think that I can't rant about certain things or even rant at all but I know that I can rant because (or venting) it's good for the human heart and pssstttt psssttt it's not someone on here) and I can do whatever it takes to be me because I know that being me is who I am supposed to be. I can rant, I can vent, I can let my feelings out and let them out whenever I feel like it because I am human and it doesn't mean I can't do it and SOMETIMES I JUST WANT TO SCREAM BECAUSE OF ALL OF THIS. Sometimes I just want to punch something--oh, crap, though, that would be violent. Oh how sad for you and I think that it's fine actually because I think it's fine for me to do whatever I want. I think it's fine for me to do the things that I want to do. Can't humans vent and rant to let out their feelings, kiddo? It's always something to you, isn't it? It's always something that you can't have a go at because you think that you aren't very good at doing so--well, hon, we're not all perfect and I know that I can vent whenever I want to and I think this is the chance for me to vent because I CAN. So I am letting it out. I am letting out my feelings and letting out that I think that the things that look like I can't do would be splendid to try to achieve--I can at least try these things. They're fine to try to do because I know that it's a different thing and you think that just because you're not some emotional freak, you can't cry and you can't fear things and that you can't try crazy things like jumping on a bed or a table or doing whatever the hell you want to do. Well, I can do those things because I want to and maybe it's just a chance for me to do these things, to do the things I want to try out and now I am getting sick (no seriously I have a flu thingy I don't even know) and I'm trying to get rid of it but I know that sometimes I can try things when I am unwell--everything can be achieved at different times. What can I say, though, people? Oblivious memories come whenever they want to and I guess I want to try something different in this world. This earth is full of deadly and dark things and video games and objects that entertain you or amuse you but it doesn't mean that you can keep on telling me that I can't be part of the dangerous, deadly and dark things because it's my chance to tell people what I can be and sometimes you are my friend and sometimes you are not. I just want to tell people that I can do whATEVER. I can do anything that lets me take on the world's adventures in many ways. I can yell, I can shout, I can scream, I can fear many things but there are also those things that don't let me run around and you are one of them so shut up and let me be something. Shut up and let me look around this world because I want to take on the journeys. Sometimes I can't take on the things that i want to love and look at and spin around in flowers at and see rainbows but that doesn't mean I can't be human. I don't want to have broken wings--I want to fly and I want to not be depressed or emotional or lonely. (well sorry I can be emotional I have feelings). Can't I be some human that wants to explore the world? Can't I be someone that can vent? Can't I be some human who wants to write 3000 words of emotional venting and it's fine for me to write down? Thank you for listening. I hope you learned how to be human.
|
