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Old 06-07-2020, 01:23 PM
HannahChen2009 HannahChen2009 is offline
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Join Date: Oct 2012
Location: Stalker >:(
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Originally Posted by AlgebraAddict View Post
hey some people will probably be unhappy at me for saying this, but the ever-changing overly-technical labels for hundreds of different gender identities and sexual orientations are not helpful to me and I don't think they are genuinely helpful to anybody... especially if you're, like, twelve.
Respectfully, "if ... are not helpful to me" could be dropped, and just phrase it as "I don't think ... are genuinely helpful to everyone"
That being said, I actually agree with the statement.

When I was younger, I tried too hard to find an identity to 'fit' me because most people were queer here and I felt left out. I ended up going for the really specific and obscure and not-far-off-from-cis-and-straight labels too. (Yes, for real. It was really cringey. I wanted to feel 'special', and that was NOT the way to do it.)
I don't think gender or sexual identity works that way. If you force an identity onto yourself just for cool points or because you feel like you HAVE to have an identity, it invalidates the struggles of people who literally didn't choose to be that way. If you felt like you 'choose' that identity, it might not be authentic.

Invalidating the experiences of actual queer people and realizing how that's kinda a shitty move when I was younger made me really hesitant to label myself as bisexual even when it became somewhat clear that I was attracted to girls.

That being said, experimentation with labels is still good, but try to stay true to yourself. There's nothing wrong with being cis and straight.
And it gets easier,
Even if it never stops being hard.
-Ena, 2017
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