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  #21  
Old 04-03-2015, 07:02 PM
mysterygirl mysterygirl is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Alaska View Post
yeah you might want to discuss that with someone. if you can, try to accept and acknowledge the fact that this voice is there, but not give in to it.
so if it says something like 'you're ugly' say to yourself, "okay, i'm being told this, but this voice isn't real. when i look in the mirror i am not ugly and i am not fat. i like ___ and ____ about me, and i can think of several things that make me beautiful. i will not let this voice control me if it isn't real."
imagine the voice is like end movie credits. just watch it leave. let it escape from your mind
I have. Many people. Some take it as 'im going to help you', others take it as 'you're mad!' Ive had both. I even talked to my family about it. They barely remember (I believe) and I told them about a month ago.
And trust me, it's hard not to give in after two years of blind listening to her. Two years i didn't understand her because I never knew she exsisted. Two years too late.
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  #22  
Old 04-03-2015, 11:15 PM
BearWithAStrawberry BearWithAStrawberry is offline
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some of my close friends smoke and i don't want them to get hurt but I'm afraid if i try and help them ill come off as overbearing and harsh (
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  #23  
Old 04-05-2015, 06:28 PM
lvhamsters lvhamsters is offline
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Friend ditched our plans to hang out so she could go bowling with her crush. I would be supportive but she should be honest and not cancel our plans with a false reason .-.
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  #24  
Old 04-05-2015, 08:12 PM
meerkat meerkat is offline
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so you know what i hate?
when people just lowkey avoid me and don't just tell me they hate me. like, say it to my face. i won't get offended bc i can be a huge asshole. just don't keep me in suspense like this okay i'll be less stressed if you straight up said "you're a bad friend and i don't want to be around you anymore." then i'll know i don't have to talk to you, and if you keep me hanging, i'll still try to initiate conversations with you because i'll keep hoping you don't hate me.
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  #25  
Old 04-09-2015, 11:51 AM
Alaska Alaska is offline
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Originally Posted by BearWithAStrawberry View Post
some of my close friends smoke and i don't want them to get hurt but I'm afraid if i try and help them ill come off as overbearing and harsh (
just let them know that you care about them and that they should remember the negative side affects of smoking, so if you're gentle about it, it won't be harsh
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  #26  
Old 04-09-2015, 11:53 AM
Alaska Alaska is offline
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Originally Posted by lvhamsters View Post
Friend ditched our plans to hang out so she could go bowling with her crush. I would be supportive but she should be honest and not cancel our plans with a false reason .-.
oh man crushes. have you told her that this annoys you?? maybe she thinks you're ok with it and doesn't realize?? if you gently let her know or send her a text explaining why that upset you, you could avoid similar situations in the future??
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  #27  
Old 12-30-2015, 02:21 PM
Steampunk Steampunk is offline
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Unhappy Help :(

Hey um I don't know if anyone really ever checks this anymore but I thought that I might as well try it since I've got nothing to lose. I have this friend and she's my best friend and I love her so much and care about her alot (as a best friend) and we both came from the same school but when we moved to our new school I met a bunch of new friends and I really liked THEM too. So I hung out with them a lot in the first few weeks of school and she started looking depressed and lonely. And I realized I needed to spend more time with her so I did my best to only hang out with her some to but to do that I had to ignore all my other friends whenever they came up to me. So I did that for a couple of days but now whenever I try to hang out with my other friends for even a couple of minutes she gets upset. I think she's learned that as long as she looks depressed and walks away after I mention talking to them I'll feel guilty and follow her around asking for forgiveness and then if I don't then she gets angry and silently glares at me for the rest of the day. And I don't know what to do because I like spending time with her and we go to each others houses and drive each other home 4 days out of the week but I also like my other friends alot and I've had to ignore them and be kind of rude in order to keep them away and I feel like I'm drifting out the group but I don't want to st o p being friends with them or my best friend so I don't know what to do!
Also, sorry this was so long.
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  #28  
Old 12-30-2015, 03:46 PM
Ember Ember is offline
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Originally Posted by Steampunk View Post
Hey um I don't know if anyone really ever checks this anymore but I thought that I might as well try it since I've got nothing to lose. I have this friend and she's my best friend and I love her so much and care about her alot (as a best friend) and we both came from the same school but when we moved to our new school I met a bunch of new friends and I really liked THEM too. So I hung out with them a lot in the first few weeks of school and she started looking depressed and lonely. And I realized I needed to spend more time with her so I did my best to only hang out with her some to but to do that I had to ignore all my other friends whenever they came up to me. So I did that for a couple of days but now whenever I try to hang out with my other friends for even a couple of minutes she gets upset. I think she's learned that as long as she looks depressed and walks away after I mention talking to them I'll feel guilty and follow her around asking for forgiveness and then if I don't then she gets angry and silently glares at me for the rest of the day. And I don't know what to do because I like spending time with her and we go to each others houses and drive each other home 4 days out of the week but I also like my other friends alot and I've had to ignore them and be kind of rude in order to keep them away and I feel like I'm drifting out the group but I don't want to st o p being friends with them or my best friend so I don't know what to do!
Also, sorry this was so long.
I would just have an honest discussion with your friend and tell her that you still care about her and love her and you want to hang out with her but you also need to make time for your other friends bc you care about them too. Also, I would make sure she starts getting into the conversations with your other friends so maybe she can feel like she can join in wih you guys too. Just like take her over and start talking and make sure you talk to her too about the same subject you're talking about with them and maybe that'll make her feel less excluded. This probably didn't make sense sorry. Good luck that's tough mate.
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  #29  
Old 12-30-2015, 03:51 PM
FrostBittenKitten FrostBittenKitten is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Steampunk View Post
Hey um I don't know if anyone really ever checks this anymore but I thought that I might as well try it since I've got nothing to lose. I have this friend and she's my best friend and I love her so much and care about her alot (as a best friend) and we both came from the same school but when we moved to our new school I met a bunch of new friends and I really liked THEM too. So I hung out with them a lot in the first few weeks of school and she started looking depressed and lonely. And I realized I needed to spend more time with her so I did my best to only hang out with her some to but to do that I had to ignore all my other friends whenever they came up to me. So I did that for a couple of days but now whenever I try to hang out with my other friends for even a couple of minutes she gets upset. I think she's learned that as long as she looks depressed and walks away after I mention talking to them I'll feel guilty and follow her around asking for forgiveness and then if I don't then she gets angry and silently glares at me for the rest of the day. And I don't know what to do because I like spending time with her and we go to each others houses and drive each other home 4 days out of the week but I also like my other friends alot and I've had to ignore them and be kind of rude in order to keep them away and I feel like I'm drifting out the group but I don't want to st o p being friends with them or my best friend so I don't know what to do!
Also, sorry this was so long.
I'll try to help, but I'm not the best advice giver. What I think you should do is apologize to your other friends that your best friend is making you ditch. Tell them why you're ditching them so much and ask if they can help. Maybe your best friend is going through some tough times and needs your support. Maybe something is wrong. Maybe she's just being a drama queen. You could ask her if she's okay.
I once had a friend who was the opposite of this. She was one of my two best friends, and me and my other bff hung out with her every day but she claimed that we wouldn't let her spend time with anyone else. We ended up not being friends.
I think that you may be able to save all of your friendships. If she is being rude and all then maybe take a break from hanging out with her. A few questions that I'd ask myself in your place would be: Is this friendship making either of us happy? Is this friendship giving me more stress than happiness? What would I do if our roles are reversed?
Anyway I hope that helped but you do not in any way have to follow up on this advice. I'm just trying to help, so I apologize if this doesn't help since advice is not my strong suit.
P.S. Embers advice is probably better than mine.
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  #30  
Old 01-03-2016, 11:29 PM
Steampunk Steampunk is offline
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Thank you! I'll try both of your advice. And I hope you have a great day
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