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  #8941  
Old 03-30-2013, 08:34 PM
Lily09 Lily09 is offline
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My life is just an entire pile of, "Hm... I'm not sure if this is the right thing to do, but whatever, I'll do it anyway!" And I only end up regretting it later. At the time, I feel like I've done the right thing. However, whenever I look back, I realize that almost every decision I make is an unsure step. It's a step to nowhere clear, it's just a step in hopes it will make my life so much better. I can't say I regret losing you now, but maybe someday I will. And you continue to pop up in my life, so I wonder if you're meant to stay or go.
Confusion.
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  #8942  
Old 03-30-2013, 08:39 PM
L.S.Trendom L.S.Trendom is offline
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Originally Posted by Lily09 View Post
My life is just an entire pile of, "Hm... I'm not sure if this is the right thing to do, but whatever, I'll do it anyway!" And I only end up regretting it later. At the time, I feel like I've done the right thing. However, whenever I look back, I realize that almost every decision I make is an unsure step. It's a step to nowhere clear, it's just a step in hopes it will make my life so much better. I can't say I regret losing you now, but maybe someday I will. And you continue to pop up in my life, so I wonder if you're meant to stay or go.
Confusion.
You can't always know if what you're doing is the right thing, but you tried to do what you thought was right, and that's important too. *hugs*
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  #8943  
Old 03-30-2013, 09:05 PM
L.S.Trendom L.S.Trendom is offline
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It's kind of funny.
The thought, "I am a worthless f***ed up piece of s**t and I deserve to die," even when I mutter it for 20 minutes straight, nonstop, doesn't really worry/scare me at all, I'm incapable of feeling such emotions toward it.
But the thought that I am/might be going to therapy (unless my mom is lying again) really effing terrifies me.
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  #8944  
Old 03-30-2013, 09:10 PM
MaryElizabeth MaryElizabeth is offline
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Originally Posted by L.S.Trendom View Post
It's kind of funny.
The thought, "I am a worthless f***ed up piece of s**t and I deserve to die," even when I mutter it for 20 minutes straight, nonstop, doesn't really worry/scare me at all, I'm incapable of feeling such emotions toward it.
But the thought that I am/might be going to therapy (unless my mom is lying again) really effing terrifies me.
Push those thoughts away. I know things are fucked up. Things are fucked up for me, too. I have to worry about faith, family, my friends, and all of the idiotic motherfuckers around me, but it's amazing people like you who we need to survive, and be the next Gerard Way who saves a kid's life, or the next J.K. Rowling who snaps a teenager's ignorant brain into realizing that it's okay to be different, to be brave, to be gay, to be strange. If the rest of us don't make it, you need to.
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  #8945  
Old 03-30-2013, 09:16 PM
lvhamsters lvhamsters is offline
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Bleh.
I'm ignored.
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  #8946  
Old 03-30-2013, 09:22 PM
L.S.Trendom L.S.Trendom is offline
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Bleh.
I'm ignored.
No you aren't. *smothers you in hugs*
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Originally Posted by MaryElizabeth View Post
Push those thoughts away. I know things are fucked up. Things are fucked up for me, too. I have to worry about faith, family, my friends, and all of the idiotic motherfuckers around me, but it's amazing people like you who we need to survive, and be the next Gerard Way who saves a kid's life, or the next J.K. Rowling who snaps a teenager's ignorant brain into realizing that it's okay to be different, to be brave, to be gay, to be strange. If the rest of us don't make it, you need to.
Thanks…
I'm not amazing, though, and the world will be just fine/probably better for the most part without me.
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  #8947  
Old 03-30-2013, 09:24 PM
Lily09 Lily09 is offline
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"the world will be fine without me"
aha
ahaha
ahahaha
no
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  #8948  
Old 03-30-2013, 09:27 PM
lvhamsters lvhamsters is offline
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Originally Posted by L.S.Trendom View Post
No you aren't. *smothers you in hugs*


Thanks…
I'm not amazing, though, and the world will be just fine/probably better for the most part without me.
Yersh i ish o3o

D: ~le gasps~ LST NOT AMAZING????!?!? ~mind cannot comprehend/explodes~
You are seriously, utterly the most amazing person i've talked to.
THE WORLD WILL DIE.
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You only live forever in the lights you make

When we were young we used to say

That you only hear the music when your hearts begin to break




Now we are the kids from yesterday
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  #8949  
Old 03-30-2013, 09:30 PM
MaryElizabeth MaryElizabeth is offline
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All of this is crashing back at me. How I'm forcing myself to go through with Confirmation, and how I'm going to a Catholic school because it's got a good education only, how Anna has to deal with so much shit just because of her sexuality, and how I should keep in touch, but I don't, how I don't believe that my "friends" care about me, how all I want to do is make a difference with writing, but I can't go to a school to learn to do that because of money, how so many things are fucked up with the idiots around me, how I'm from a long line of assholes, how I'm always going to have to think about how my grandparents are passive aggressive, lazy racists, how I don't seem to be more than a biracial, arrogant, reader to people around me, how I can't manage to talk to people because of my own issues, how things aren't getting better. Things aren't getting better for anyone.
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  #8950  
Old 03-30-2013, 09:34 PM
lvhamsters lvhamsters is offline
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Originally Posted by MaryElizabeth View Post
All of this is crashing back at me. How I'm forcing myself to go through with Confirmation, and how I'm going to a Catholic school because it's got a good education only, how Anna has to deal with so much shit just because of her sexuality, and how I should keep in touch, but I don't, how I don't believe that my "friends" care about me, how all I want to do is make a difference with writing, but I can't go to a school to learn to do that because of money, how so many things are fucked up with the idiots around me, how I'm from a long line of assholes, how I'm always going to have to think about how my grandparents are passive aggressive, lazy racists, how I don't seem to be more than a biracial, arrogant, reader to people around me, how I can't manage to talk to people because of my own issues, how things aren't getting better. Things aren't getting better for anyone.
Aw Just go with the flow. Things will get better eventually. I know, I know, easier said than done, but in every bad situation, it eventually gets better. ^^
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You only live forever in the lights you make

When we were young we used to say

That you only hear the music when your hearts begin to break




Now we are the kids from yesterday
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