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  #19901  
Old 04-17-2019, 03:18 PM
FrostBittenKitten FrostBittenKitten is offline
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Originally Posted by Werty View Post
actually I used to feel like that all the time
it might be an aquarius thing what's your sign
im a virgo actually

i think i have social anxiety which is why i freak out about that kind of thing a lot but i do kind of have a virgo-ish desire to be perfect and my stupid tendency to put pressure on myself doesn't help (that and being a "neat freak"--which i am not--is rly all i even know about my sign)
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  #19902  
Old 04-17-2019, 11:35 PM
Swallowtail Swallowtail is offline
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fuck so apparently my mom got drunk and attacked my dad and brother which tbh i could kinda see coming and they’re ok but my parents are probably going to get divorced? this is all coming from my brother like right now and i’ll call him in a bit but idk
we argue a lot but i really do love him and hope he’s good and i’ve always felt really guilty for leaving him at home and fucking off to boarding school bc often i did have to defend him (not physically though then) from my mother and now i just feel so horrible abt leaving him at home
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  #19903  
Old 04-17-2019, 11:37 PM
Swallowtail Swallowtail is offline
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i’ve always kinda thought and also hoped my parents would get divorced but???im just worried about him. and also i have to go home on friday for easter and i guess it’d be good to have me there for ian but jesus christ
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  #19904  
Old 04-18-2019, 07:37 AM
Werty Werty is offline
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Originally Posted by FrostBittenKitten View Post
im a virgo actually

i think i have social anxiety which is why i freak out about that kind of thing a lot but i do kind of have a virgo-ish desire to be perfect and my stupid tendency to put pressure on myself doesn't help (that and being a "neat freak"--which i am not--is rly all i even know about my sign)
yep okay 100000% virgo right there

if you find yourself pressuring yourself to not be stupid and beating yourself up constantly then you can 1) blame it on being a virgo 2) surround yourself with people that care about you and try to distract yourself
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  #19905  
Old 04-18-2019, 11:11 AM
FrostBittenKitten FrostBittenKitten is offline
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Originally Posted by Werty View Post
yep okay 100000% virgo right there

if you find yourself pressuring yourself to not be stupid and beating yourself up constantly then you can 1) blame it on being a virgo 2) surround yourself with people that care about you and try to distract yourself
Thanks
Iím still working on that second one (and by that I mean actually talking to my friends)
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will i ever be more than i've always been

tap, tap, tapping on the glass

Waving through a window
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  #19906  
Old 04-28-2019, 11:43 AM
Swallowtail Swallowtail is offline
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seniors are making the yearbook rn and had to decide on a dedication and like.... so the obvious choice is owen because who else. but a small but very influential group of them fucking hated him and made his life here terrible and i guess they can’t reflect on the fact that they contributed to a boys death because they decided absolutely no way were they going to dedicate the yearbook to him.
they wanted to dedicate it to the fucking chickens, who also died this year. and yeah, that sucks, ok, any other year it’d be funny and whatever. “the chickens died too this year!!” yeah so did a sixteen year old boy who lived with you for three years shut the fuck up
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  #19907  
Old 05-12-2019, 11:28 AM
Swallowtail Swallowtail is offline
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god what is it with this year and people dying on thursdays
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  #19908  
Old 06-22-2019, 05:40 PM
Steampunk Steampunk is offline
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Alright folks, I need some advice on a very sensitive matter. Quick possible trigger warning for a few of you- this involves a friend who is at risk for possibly committing suicide.
A close friend of mine has been dealing with depression for quite some time, and is struggling with their gender identity on top of that. Theyíve stopped seeing a counselor but do have meds they try to remember to take. Since we go to different schools itís usually difficult to read how theyíre doing at any given time over text. But today we shared a conversation that has me reasonably worried.
In their texts they admitted to me theyíve been feeling increasingly like they donít belong in their body and have been feeling more and more suicidal, but donít yet plan on acting on it. With a bit of prompting from me, they also admitted they have a few possible suicide plans and may potentially have the means to carry them out.
Normally Iíd have no qualms about reporting this to their mother or some kind of school resource, but Iím worried losing their trust now might prove harmful to their future wellbeing.
Their mother is very progressive and already knows about and supports their gender identity. She also knows theyíre depressed and set up counseling for them awhile back.
The problem is that if i tell their mother and she confronts them about it (which Iím pretty sure she will) it could serve to make things tenser at home and not actually do any good. When they first told their mother they were depressed they ended up feeling super guilty about it because their mom started crying and blaming it on fruits and vegetables and etc, so Iím worried their mother might make things worse. They also wonít do any therapy anymore because it makes them uncomfortable, and I believe frequently forget to take their meds.
If i tell their mother now, what if it doesnít help anything? What if I just lose their trust without actually helping them at all and when the time comes that theyíre really considering it in the moment, they wonít trust me enough to call me or someone else?
I feel like I should share the messages with their mother, but they arenít very social and Iím scared that if the time comes and they donít trust me enough to come to me for help, they Just wonít go to anybody at all.
Typing this out, Iím feeling more confident that I still need to show the messages to their mother, but Iíd still appreciate any comments or advice you may have.
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  #19909  
Old 06-22-2019, 07:29 PM
FrostBittenKitten FrostBittenKitten is offline
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Originally Posted by Steampunk View Post
Alright folks, I need some advice on a very sensitive matter. Quick possible trigger warning for a few of you- this involves a friend who is at risk for possibly committing suicide.
A close friend of mine has been dealing with depression for quite some time, and is struggling with their gender identity on top of that. Theyíve stopped seeing a counselor but do have meds they try to remember to take. Since we go to different schools itís usually difficult to read how theyíre doing at any given time over text. But today we shared a conversation that has me reasonably worried.
In their texts they admitted to me theyíve been feeling increasingly like they donít belong in their body and have been feeling more and more suicidal, but donít yet plan on acting on it. With a bit of prompting from me, they also admitted they have a few possible suicide plans and may potentially have the means to carry them out.
Normally Iíd have no qualms about reporting this to their mother or some kind of school resource, but Iím worried losing their trust now might prove harmful to their future wellbeing.
Their mother is very progressive and already knows about and supports their gender identity. She also knows theyíre depressed and set up counseling for them awhile back.
The problem is that if i tell their mother and she confronts them about it (which Iím pretty sure she will) it could serve to make things tenser at home and not actually do any good. When they first told their mother they were depressed they ended up feeling super guilty about it because their mom started crying and blaming it on fruits and vegetables and etc, so Iím worried their mother might make things worse. They also wonít do any therapy anymore because it makes them uncomfortable, and I believe frequently forget to take their meds.
If i tell their mother now, what if it doesnít help anything? What if I just lose their trust without actually helping them at all and when the time comes that theyíre really considering it in the moment, they wonít trust me enough to call me or someone else?
I feel like I should share the messages with their mother, but they arenít very social and Iím scared that if the time comes and they donít trust me enough to come to me for help, they Just wonít go to anybody at all.
Typing this out, Iím feeling more confident that I still need to show the messages to their mother, but Iíd still appreciate any comments or advice you may have.
Wow, that's tough. I think you should probably tell their mother, because even if means that your friend would be mad at you, at least they would be alive. Hopefully they will realize that you only told their mom out of desire for their well-being.

I know not every situation is the same, but a while ago I had a friend who told me and my other friend that she was planning on committing suicide the next day and I called someone who could get in contact with her parents immediately. I do not regret it. It turned out that she probably wasn't going to go through with it but nevertheless I think it's better safe than sorry.
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on the outside always looking in

will i ever be more than i've always been

tap, tap, tapping on the glass

Waving through a window
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  #19910  
Old 06-24-2019, 06:40 AM
Werty Werty is offline
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Join Date: Dec 2015
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Steampunk View Post
Alright folks, I need some advice on a very sensitive matter. Quick possible trigger warning for a few of you- this involves a friend who is at risk for possibly committing suicide.
A close friend of mine has been dealing with depression for quite some time, and is struggling with their gender identity on top of that. They’ve stopped seeing a counselor but do have meds they try to remember to take. Since we go to different schools it’s usually difficult to read how they’re doing at any given time over text. But today we shared a conversation that has me reasonably worried.
In their texts they admitted to me they’ve been feeling increasingly like they don’t belong in their body and have been feeling more and more suicidal, but don’t yet plan on acting on it. With a bit of prompting from me, they also admitted they have a few possible suicide plans and may potentially have the means to carry them out.
Normally I’d have no qualms about reporting this to their mother or some kind of school resource, but I’m worried losing their trust now might prove harmful to their future wellbeing.
Their mother is very progressive and already knows about and supports their gender identity. She also knows they’re depressed and set up counseling for them awhile back.
The problem is that if i tell their mother and she confronts them about it (which I’m pretty sure she will) it could serve to make things tenser at home and not actually do any good. When they first told their mother they were depressed they ended up feeling super guilty about it because their mom started crying and blaming it on fruits and vegetables and etc, so I’m worried their mother might make things worse. They also won’t do any therapy anymore because it makes them uncomfortable, and I believe frequently forget to take their meds.
If i tell their mother now, what if it doesn’t help anything? What if I just lose their trust without actually helping them at all and when the time comes that they’re really considering it in the moment, they won’t trust me enough to call me or someone else?
I feel like I should share the messages with their mother, but they aren’t very social and I’m scared that if the time comes and they don’t trust me enough to come to me for help, they Just won’t go to anybody at all.
Typing this out, I’m feeling more confident that I still need to show the messages to their mother, but I’d still appreciate any comments or advice you may have.
I've had a friend like this recently who isn't suicidal, but is pretty sure she has bipolar one. I was struggling with the same problem, and if she hadn't opened up to her family yesterday, I would have told them anonymously.

I'd recommend the same. Of course, you might want to find out if this friend has told anyone else first, because if you do it anonymously and nobody else knows, then they'd probably be even more angry.

Of course, this friend might be on edge for a while, but if you think this is for the best, then go for it. If you think this might make things worse, don't. Have a long, long talk with them, either way. Don't at all hint at telling their mom.

If they start to suspect other friends, please steer them away so there's no blame on innocent people.
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