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  #1291  
Old 04-20-2016, 11:28 PM
Lena Lena is offline
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this notebook is kind of the only thing keeping me sane right now.
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i wonder what keeps us so high up
could there be love beneath these wings?

((death, white lies))
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  #1292  
Old 05-11-2016, 10:47 PM
AlgebraAddict AlgebraAddict is offline
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DO YOU KNOW SOMETHING I LITERALLY DO NOT CARE WHAT YOU THINK ANYMORE. I AM SO FUCKING DONE.

YES, YOU ARE MY FRIEND. SO IS HE. BUT YOU ARE FUCKING UNRELIABLE AND YOU GO FROM ZERO TO INFINITY REAL FAST AND YOU JUST FLIP FLOP BETWEEN BEING MY BEST FRIEND IN THE WHOLE WORLD TO ACTING LIKE YOU FUCKING HATE ME AND I DON'T GET IT. BUT YOU KNOW WHAT? WHATEVER.

YES, YOU ARE MY FRIEND. BUT SO IS HE. HE IS ALWAYS THERE FOR ME AND HE DOESN'T PRETEND THAT HES MY FRIEND AND THEN DUMP ME ON THE GROUND LIKE HE NEVER EVEN KNEW ME. DESPITE WHAT YOU MAY THINK, YOUR EX BOYFRIEND IS A GOOD PERSON.

oh yeah you dump him like "omg hes so fuckin stupid idk why I even liked him idc what he thinks"

and then he says he can't be friends and you flip the fuck out like "oh my god he doesn't even care about me and now he wants space what the fuck"

DO YOU KNOW HOW MANY TIMES YOU HAVE ASKED FOR SPACE FROM HIM? A LOT... and then the ONE TIME he ends things you freak out. why? because you always have to have the last word. you didn't seem to care about his feelings when you dumped him time after time. now he's saying you can't be friends, with good fucking reason, and you are upset.

and now you won't even talk to me, like you never knew me and swore you would be my best friend forever.

im so done with you.
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w a r n i n g
s i g n
that if you talk enough sense, then you'll lose your mind



- I Found, by Amber Run
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  #1293  
Old 05-26-2016, 10:14 PM
AlgebraAddict AlgebraAddict is offline
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Default oh dear here we go again

alright /deep breath/ here we go


GO TO HELL YOU FUCKED UP PERSON WHO FEELS THE NEED TO RUIN PEOPLES LIVES AND THAT'S BASICALLY WHY i DON'T TALK TO YOU ANYMORE BECAUSE YOU'RE kiINDA A /HORRIBL/ PERSON SO IDK MAN MAYBE THATS WHY
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and I'll use you as a
w a r n i n g
s i g n
that if you talk enough sense, then you'll lose your mind



- I Found, by Amber Run
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  #1294  
Old 08-21-2016, 12:32 AM
AlgebraAddict AlgebraAddict is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by AlgebraAddict View Post
DO YOU KNOW SOMETHING I LITERALLY DO NOT CARE WHAT YOU THINK ANYMORE. I AM SO FUCKING DONE.

YES, YOU ARE MY FRIEND. SO IS HE. BUT YOU ARE FUCKING UNRELIABLE AND YOU GO FROM ZERO TO INFINITY REAL FAST AND YOU JUST FLIP FLOP BETWEEN BEING MY BEST FRIEND IN THE WHOLE WORLD TO ACTING LIKE YOU FUCKING HATE ME AND I DON'T GET IT. BUT YOU KNOW WHAT? WHATEVER.

YES, YOU ARE MY FRIEND. BUT SO IS HE. HE IS ALWAYS THERE FOR ME AND HE DOESN'T PRETEND THAT HES MY FRIEND AND THEN DUMP ME ON THE GROUND LIKE HE NEVER EVEN KNEW ME. DESPITE WHAT YOU MAY THINK, YOUR EX BOYFRIEND IS A GOOD PERSON.

oh yeah you dump him like "omg hes so fuckin stupid idk why I even liked him idc what he thinks"

and then he says he can't be friends and you flip the fuck out like "oh my god he doesn't even care about me and now he wants space what the fuck"

DO YOU KNOW HOW MANY TIMES YOU HAVE ASKED FOR SPACE FROM HIM? A LOT... and then the ONE TIME he ends things you freak out. why? because you always have to have the last word. you didn't seem to care about his feelings when you dumped him time after time. now he's saying you can't be friends, with good fucking reason, and you are upset.

and now you won't even talk to me, like you never knew me and swore you would be my best friend forever.

im so done with you.
Quote:
Originally Posted by AlgebraAddict View Post
alright /deep breath/ here we go


GO TO HELL YOU FUCKED UP PERSON WHO FEELS THE NEED TO RUIN PEOPLES LIVES AND THAT'S BASICALLY WHY i DON'T TALK TO YOU ANYMORE BECAUSE YOU'RE kiINDA A /HORRIBL/ PERSON SO IDK MAN MAYBE THATS WHY


fuck you
fuck you and all the times you made me think i could trust you
all the time you fooled me
into believing you'd take care of my friend's heart
and mine
and mine
and mine?

what was wrong with me?

you're back at it again.
I heard what you're doing
flirting with him
just to mess with him
because you "don't actually like him"
oh, I know he has a selective memory

he doesn't remember all the times you screwed him over
and told him that you never liked him
and you only thought he was attractive and he never meant anything to you
when you put him on speakerphone while he cried
and I sat by ("awkwardly" would be an understatement)
I mean, who the fuck even does that??
like what actual fuck?? i don't even understand you
why would you hurt someone like that
on purpose
idk
maybe i'm just stupid but i can't comprehend that level of horrible-ness
like honestly you are so fucking pathetic
honestly.

okay but whatever
the point is
you can fool him
you can fuck with him like your little toy over and over again
because he'll just kindly forget everything you ever did to him

but I won't. not anymore

I will never be your friend again
I will never let you in my life
in my heart
DO YOU KNOW HOW MANY SCARS I'VE GOT JUST FROM ALL THE SHIT YOU'VE SAID TO ME?
spoiler alert: a whole fuckin lot

oh and don't even get me started on me and my fucked up mind
the way you tell me to get over myself
and deal with my problems like a grown up
and just be happy
like it's that. fucking. easy
well it's not, goddammit.
and you have a convenient self-diagnosis but that doesn't change that you will never, ever understand what i've gone through
what I'm GOING THROUGH
BECAUSE FUCK YOU, YOU ARE NOT MY THERAPIST
YOU ARE NOT MY BEST FRIEND
YOU ARE NOT EVEN MY GODDAMN FRIEND
BECAUSE YOU ARE A HORRIBLE FUCKING PERSON AND YOU DO NOTHING BUT HURT AND HURT AND HURT MORE AND MORE PEOPLE
AND THEY ALWAYS FUCKING FORGIVE YOU FOR IT
and im so sick of it
im so sick of pretending we're fine

i guess i've always forgiven you because you're pretty and you make me feel good about myself for a few brief moments when you shower me with shallow flattery
(and then of course you drop the bomb and make me feel like complete shit. ha)
i always admired you for your looks and your talent and the fact that you seem to have it together

but that's not worth admiring anyone for?
from now on
i will admire people for how much love they've got in their system
to see just how kind they can be
because that's what fucking matters
not you
you
don't
fucking
matter
at
all

because you know what?
lemme tell u a secret
you're just a bad person

and you know what I say to bad people?
"fuck you"
have a nice life
i hope you one day get what you deserve
__________________



and I'll use you as a
w a r n i n g
s i g n
that if you talk enough sense, then you'll lose your mind



- I Found, by Amber Run

Last edited by AlgebraAddict; 08-21-2016 at 12:35 AM.
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  #1295  
Old 08-21-2016, 03:15 PM
Garrett Garrett is offline
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im so overwhelmed. and im really insecure. and i dont even know myself or my sexulaity and i dont feel like identifying as straight or gay or bisexual, like can I just be me? if I want to be with a girl can i be with a girl and if i want to sleep with a guy can i sleep with a guy? The thing is that i'm sexually attracted to guys and a little less sexually attracted to girls. Though I've never had a crush on a guy or thought about being with a guy, and I have had tons of crushes on girls...emotionally. And I find girls attractive but they don't get me...excited?...like guys do.
like i wanna just know if im gonna get a boner when i make out with a girl. but its gotta be someone i like.
oh and ive never kissed anyone so there's that.
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you don't need anyone else to be happy

Last edited by Garrett; 08-21-2016 at 03:18 PM.
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  #1296  
Old 08-21-2016, 03:54 PM
AlgebraAddict AlgebraAddict is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Garrett View Post
im so overwhelmed. and im really insecure. and i dont even know myself or my sexulaity and i dont feel like identifying as straight or gay or bisexual, like can I just be me? if I want to be with a girl can i be with a girl and if i want to sleep with a guy can i sleep with a guy? The thing is that i'm sexually attracted to guys and a little less sexually attracted to girls. Though I've never had a crush on a guy or thought about being with a guy, and I have had tons of crushes on girls...emotionally. And I find girls attractive but they don't get me...excited?...like guys do.
like i wanna just know if im gonna get a boner when i make out with a girl. but its gotta be someone i like.
oh and ive never kissed anyone so there's that.
duude /no first kiss club high five/

idk if u were really looking fir advice on this, but like it's not a big deal whatever you want to do and honestly it sounds awful but you can like experiment? like if you want to make out with someone and they're all for it, go for it dude and see how it is. anyways i hope u find luv <3
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and I'll use you as a
w a r n i n g
s i g n
that if you talk enough sense, then you'll lose your mind



- I Found, by Amber Run
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  #1297  
Old 08-21-2016, 04:21 PM
Garrett Garrett is offline
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Location: high by the beach
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Quote:
Originally Posted by AlgebraAddict View Post
duude /no first kiss club high five/

idk if u were really looking fir advice on this, but like it's not a big deal whatever you want to do and honestly it sounds awful but you can like experiment? like if you want to make out with someone and they're all for it, go for it dude and see how it is. anyways i hope u find luv <3
thanks i hope i do too. it's just that i live in the "bible belt" of the US and so there's literally three people I know personally who would be ok with me having relations with a guy.
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  #1298  
Old 08-21-2016, 05:30 PM
SilverMoon SilverMoon is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Garrett View Post
thanks i hope i do too. it's just that i live in the "bible belt" of the US and so there's literally three people I know personally who would be ok with me having relations with a guy.
so I looked up the "Bible Belt" cos I was like what the fuck is the Bible Belt why the fuck does autocorrect capitalize that but not alma karma jfc bitch why

and I found out that being Texan means I'm in the supposed bb area
but I live a little north of Dallas and like, it is not a White Southern Christian area. I live closer to a mosque than a church. There's a Hindu temple as close to me as there is a church. There are lots of ethnically Chinese, Indian, Pakistani-- those are the three non-white groups there are a LOT of in my immediate area. In my elementary school I don't even know if whites were the majority; if they were, they were the majority but not as big as the combination of all the minorities. I'm not sure about adults, but like all of the kids I know are pretty progressive. It's never been that huge of an issue among the demographic of kids I know-- but then again, most of my acquaintances are fairly high-functioning, Asian, non-Christian, and often queer but not always. So while I may not have an accurate grasp of my area as a whole I was kind of surprised to find I live in the Bible Belt lol.
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this and this and this
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  #1299  
Old 08-21-2016, 05:59 PM
maxi maxi is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Garrett View Post
im so overwhelmed. and im really insecure. and i dont even know myself or my sexulaity and i dont feel like identifying as straight or gay or bisexual, like can I just be me? if I want to be with a girl can i be with a girl and if i want to sleep with a guy can i sleep with a guy? The thing is that i'm sexually attracted to guys and a little less sexually attracted to girls. Though I've never had a crush on a guy or thought about being with a guy, and I have had tons of crushes on girls...emotionally. And I find girls attractive but they don't get me...excited?...like guys do.
like i wanna just know if im gonna get a boner when i make out with a girl. but its gotta be someone i like.
oh and ive never kissed anyone so there's that.
You don't even have to label yourself. I identify myself as bisexual, but I tend to lean towards guys. I've had my first kiss with a guy, so I know that it's definitely guys I'm attracted to. I've had crushes on girls, never done anything with them. I don't mind. I don't want to label myself because it just feels like you're putting a brand on your skin and it hurts.
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What a wonderful caricature of intimacy
Raindrops on roses and
Girls in white dresses and
Sleeping with roaches and
Taking best guesses
At the shade of the sheets and
Before all the stains
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  #1300  
Old 08-21-2016, 07:46 PM
Garrett Garrett is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by SilverMoon View Post
so I looked up the "Bible Belt" cos I was like what the fuck is the Bible Belt why the fuck does autocorrect capitalize that but not alma karma jfc bitch why

and I found out that being Texan means I'm in the supposed bb area
but I live a little north of Dallas and like, it is not a White Southern Christian area. I live closer to a mosque than a church. There's a Hindu temple as close to me as there is a church. There are lots of ethnically Chinese, Indian, Pakistani-- those are the three non-white groups there are a LOT of in my immediate area. In my elementary school I don't even know if whites were the majority; if they were, they were the majority but not as big as the combination of all the minorities. I'm not sure about adults, but like all of the kids I know are pretty progressive. It's never been that huge of an issue among the demographic of kids I know-- but then again, most of my acquaintances are fairly high-functioning, Asian, non-Christian, and often queer but not always. So while I may not have an accurate grasp of my area as a whole I was kind of surprised to find I live in the Bible Belt lol.
Well I live in Georgia, close to Alabama, so it's probably more evident here.
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