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My Life....................IS like a RAINBOW

My Life....................IS like a RAINBOW

Posted January 5th, 2017 by waverunner

by l-/ TheLastPilot (Sally)
in a March to The Sea

January 5th, 2017

Red Is for the harder times, when you wanted to run and hide.

                                                                             Orange Is For the laughter you shared with someone who cared.

Yellow is for the days you lived, Anger and fear had been rid.

                                                                                                Green is for the special moments, Like the time that you stood in silence.

Blue is for the tears that you cried, especially when a loved one died.                

                                                                                                                         Indigo is for the Magical nights, the amazing still moon and maybe some frights.

Violet is for the dreams you had, and the ones that you achieved were the opposite of bad.

                                                                        MY LIFE .................................................................................................................................Is like a RAINBOW

 


See more stories by l-/ TheLastPilot (Sally)
I think you meant to put the

I think you meant to put the red in the color red. It's written in black for me.

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<(QuartzMaster A.K.A. Osaid)> Read my books!!!! :D

"Uuuuuuuuurr Ahhhhhhhhhrrrrrr Uhhrrrrr Ahhhrrrr Aaaaarrrggghhh..." - Chewbacca

Posted by QuartzMaster on Thu, 01/05/2017 - 19:20
Really? Sorry about that, i

Really? Sorry about that, i don't know what went wrong.

Posted by Matemap Tarazet... on Thu, 01/05/2017 - 19:27
this is a really interesting

this is a really interesting concept for a poem.

Posted by infinte darknes... on Thu, 01/05/2017 - 23:54
My two main problems were

My two main problems were the title and the rhyming. If I were you, I'd go for "my life is a rainbow" not "my life is LIKE a rainbow". That's just a matter of preference but I think it would be a lot more emphatic that way. Also some of your rhymes seemed veery forced. Generally you should never use the word "bad" in writing since there are so many more descriptive words. The fact that you used it basically just for a rhyme and you said "opposite of bad" made it really hard to take seriously. That's just one example that stood out to me, but it's definitely a recurring issue throughout the poem. If you really can't find better words to rhyme, maybe consider a non rhyming poem??? I don't know. It is an interesting idea for a poem though.

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love life and peace out <3

Posted by la la land {esther} on Fri, 01/06/2017 - 15:44
ya, i know what you mean. I

ya, i know what you mean. I was tiered, and hungry, and angry, so..........ya....it wasn't my best work.

Posted by Matemap Tarazet... on Fri, 01/06/2017 - 17:31

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