sat in a pool on the bathroom floor - a short story (TW)
Posted May 19th, 2023 by Not_Jello
in Inverclyde
May 19th, 2023
She had to move on.
She had to.
He was dead, and there was nothing she could do about it. Nothing she could have done. She grabbed a sharp blade, thinking about how he would do this sometimes. No, she couldn't end up like him. However, it was so tempting.
She slowly slid the blade up her left arm, unfazed when the dark blood began pouring out. She could almost see the fat through the river pouring from her forearm. It hurt. It hurt so much, but thinking about him hurt more.
She stared at the cut dragging up her arm
(oh how it hurts no no stop stop no he is dead no no he is not dead is this a dream)
and stopped, then eyed the medicine cabinet.
(yes medication take ibuprofen die die die die)
She opened the cabinet with the arm that wasn't bleeding out. Her blood fell to the floor in trickles, like a broken tap. Drip, drip, drip.
There was lots of medicines, some Tylenol, some Ibuprofen... Tylenol could work. Yes. She grabbed it and attempted to open the bottle.
(tug tug tug tug tug)
It popped open and she took them one by one. No sips of water. She looked back at her wrist.
(oh no oh no i'm going to die yes i will i will die)
It was still bleeding. She took in a deep breath and sat down on the bathroom floor. There was no point. She was going to die and someone was going to find her. She wouldn't even have a suicide note. No, they would find her journal. That would be enough.
ENTRY 1 - SEPTEMBER 26TH 2021
My therapist made me keep a journal, so here I am. My best friend died just before the summer holidays started, and I've felt horrible ever since. I've flaked on all my plans with friends. I don't deserve to live, I couldn't save him.
She'd felt that way for years. It would all be over soon, so she just sat on the bathroom floor. In a pool of her own blood.
Oh, no.
She didn't want to die.
(no no no no please let me li)
She passed out, and died 2 hours later.
Alone.
There were many more deaths to come, is what nobody knew.
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So good, is all that I can say.
"You should never argue with a crazy mi-mi-mi-mi-mind," Moving Out (Anthony's Song) by Billy Joel "Reflections in the waves spark my memories, some happy, some sad... I think of childhood friends, and the dreams we had" Come Sail Away by Styx